


Killing Me Slowly

by happyevraftr



Category: Sookie Stackhouse/Southern Vampire Mysteries
Genre: Drama, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2010-02-15
Updated: 2010-02-15
Packaged: 2017-10-26 09:35:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 96,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/281490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/happyevraftr/pseuds/happyevraftr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With Hallow dead and Mark on the loose, Eric's memory loss threatens his position and his area. With old threats and new, has Sookie become powerful enough on her own to save herself and her vampire? **ON HIATUS</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> _I have reworked this chapter and it's much more to my liking-and hopefully yours!_

_I have reworked this chapter and it's much more to my liking-and hopefully yours!_

 _This story is set immediately following the witch war. While all characters are going to be from the cannon, I purposely made this story in order to make something different. There will be lots of twists and hopefully ideas that you haven't seen in any other fan fiction before. Please read and review- encouragment is the lifeforce of this story! I've used several suggestions already to enhance this story and take it in new and exciting directions._

 _Huge thanks to my beta, YoungBoho, she's the reason my writing has really improved and therefore made this story a million times better._

 _I don't own any of the characters; Harris gets that privileged. Enjoy!_

* * *

Emptiness; the kind of loss that leaves you so empty all you want to do is find the switch to your heart and make the pain go away. It's like the pieces of who you used to be have been torn apart and scattered everywhere for you to try and find and put back together.

Regret; longing so desperately that you had the foresight to prevent yourself from making stupid choices. Never having a moment of peace because your mind replays how things could have been different over and over again.

Anger; deep, in-the-pit of your stomach abhorrence for how life can be so cruel. Anger at your choices and the hand life dealt out to you.

All those emotions reverberated in me as I sat at my old kitchen table. I had just witnessed some of the most gruesome violence first hand and lived through it. The idea of going back to just being a freaky small-town barmaid was out of the question. The witch war was over, but it changed something in me. Getting involved with Vampires had been a mistake; caring for Eric was even worse. He would be back to his usual self by morning and I would return to my normal life until they needed my telepathic abilities.

But how was I supposed to forget everything that happened between Eric and me? I had left my heart unguarded with Eric here because I thought it was him who needed protection; but I had been wrong. Through his own vulnerability he had opened up parts of me that I never thought I would get to share with a man. Without abandon I had given him the keys to my heart and the power to break it. His touch was soothing, his smell intoxicating, and he was painfully beautiful. Just his presence was enough to give me peace while simultaneously lighting a fire of passion I didn't know I could contain.

My heart felt like it was being torn in two. I knew Area 5 needed their sheriff back and while I loved my Eric, I honestly did miss the ferocity and danger that used to always be present in his eyes. However, I knew once he took on that role he would no longer want me. Once he didn't depend on me to keep him safe I would become just an asset to him again. Not to mention the fact I wouldn't want to be with him either. From the moment I met Bill I started getting drawn into Vampire politics more and more and I didn't want it. There was too much hatred and violence in the supernatural world for me to ever want to be a part of. The war had already changed me and I didn't want to go through something like that again. I'd rather be considered a freak among humans than have to be part of a group that was so cruel.

While logically I knew all of that, the number one emotion I was feeling was heartbreak over the thought of losing the friend and lover I'd only recently gained. Eric was passionate, sweet, loving, amazing, strong, protective, and exactly what I wanted. I would give anything just to try and make things work between us, but the person I knew wasn't really him. Of all things, I had fallen in love with someone that didn't exist, now that's crazy!

Feeling stupid and overwhelmed I closed my eyes and tried to block out the torrent of emotions threatening to drown my heart. After a couple minutes of slow steady deep breaths I felt the numbness start to grow in my chest and the pain start to ease.

"Lover, why are you so upset? Please don't cry."

His voice startled me and I yelped as I fell off my chair. I was so deep in thought I didn't even hear Eric come in the room, much less realize I had been silently crying. Fortunately he caught me before I met the floor. I placed my hands on his stony chest and looked up into his icy blue eyes. Just one look at him and the box I had shoved my emotions into was breaking open and setting the pain free.

"I'm sorry, I just…." I sighed dropping my head to stare at my feet, trying to shut my emotions back up. "I was thinking that I'm going to miss this." I said trying to relay all the feelings for him in that simple sentence. For the sake of my dignity and Eric's comfort level I tried to contain the tears that were still slipping down my cheeks, but I couldn't help but cry for the loss I was still already feeling.

Eric pulled me into his embrace and nuzzled my hair inhaling deeply. "Lover, I will never leave you. Even after I remember who I am I will come to you. You know I'll leave everything for you if you want."

His words were twisting the knife that was already lodged so deeply in my heart. How could he not understand? If he was his normal self he would have never said those words. "I know you say that now but trust me, you would never sacrifice everything you've worked for and the safety of your area for a human. As much as I want to believe you, I know you better than you do right now."

He pulled back and lifted my chin to peer deep in my eyes. The intensity and sincerity in them scared me. I saw so much love, pain, and longing in them. "Then I am an utter fool."

I gave him a weak smile, "No Eric, you are vampire. A thousand year-old Viking vampire who got that way by being ruthless and cunning. You don't allow yourself to have any weakness and that's exactly what I am to you; a liability."

Eric's brow crinkled into a frown. "All of that is in the past, my only concern now is you. Being with you as all I need to survive." I started to protest again but his mouth was on mine before I could react. His tongue gently traced over my lips making me want to part them for him, but I held firm not responding to it. Being with him is what my body wanted, but I knew it would only cause my heart more pain in the morning if I bonded with him further before he left.

Sensing my resistance, he wound one arm around me pulling my body close to his while cupping my cheek in his other hand. He held me tight while kissing me with the passion and understanding that can only be shared between two people who have shared a secret part of themselves with each other. I'm proud to say I still didn't give into him though. Besides the scent of my arousal I kept my body from reacting to him. Eric pulled back and gave me his trademark smirk.

"Lover, must I make you yield to me again? Perhaps another warm," he started kissing my neck and I couldn't help the shivers that crossed my skin. My will started to waver and I was unsure how long I could actually resist him.

"steamy," a kiss on the vein I'd just love for him to sink his fangs into. I tried to block out the visions of the last time he bit me there, but it was to late; I could already feel my panties starting to get wet.

"tantalizing" a nibble to my ear and I felt myself melting into him and coming undone, completely forgetting why it was such a bad idea to be with him.

"shower is in order." He presses the obvious sign of his excitement into me and I got lost in the sensations he created in me.

"Stop thinking about tomorrow, I want to enjoy my goddess for tonight."

With that he swept me up into his arms and carried me to the shower where this whole thing started. While the water was heating up we took our time slowly undressing each other. I had already crossed a line I couldn't go back over so if I was going to cause myself extra heartache I figured I might as well go all out. If tonight was going to be my last time to have Eric like this I wanted to make it count.

Neither of us felt the need to rush as we got in the shower and took turns washing the other. With each stroke I tried to memorize every curve and detail of his body.

"This isn't goodbye." He turned around and whispered in my ear. I couldn't hold back a moan as he gently stroked my bottom lip with his tongue, coaxing me to let him in. This time I responded without reservation; anxious to taste him and feel close to him again. His hands were roaming my body in a gentle, yet demanding way; like he couldn't get enough of me. The combination of his icy hands gliding over my water-slick body and the warm water cascading over me made me dizzy with desire. He started worshiping my nipples, biting and sucking one until I could barely stand it, then he started on the other.

 _'How could I ever deny this man?'_ I felt like I was coming undone after just five minutes under his skilled hand. I knew then that as long as he wanted me, I would never be able to deny him my love

"You are so beautiful; my very own goddess. I will worship your body for eternity." He pulled me in for another passionate kiss while his fingers reached down to tease my sensitive nub. My body reacted of its own accord and arched into his hand, begging for more of him. Passion and lust clouded my thoughts causing my knees to buckle.

"Bed, now." I choked out, surprised by how husky and desperate my voice sounded. The next thing I know we're laying on my bed too caught up in the moment to worry about the fact we're still dripping wet.

Eric pauses to look in my eyes. I'm sure he can see the desperation and the lust which is mirrored in his own.

"What lover? Tell me what you want."

I hold his gaze as best I can while his thumb is still circling my sweet spot making me quiver. I feel a warmth beginning to spread through me and I feel like I'm going to lose my mind if I don't get the release I need so badly at this point.

"I want you. Please, please don't stop."

Apparently that's all he was looking before because he started kissing my inner thighs before placing light fluttery kisses on my sex while he massaged my breast in his large capable hand.

"Watch me lover, watch me while I make you scream my name." he said before driving his tongue into my center. He kept his eyes locked with mine as he skillfully brought my body up and down waves of ecstasy.

"More, please more." At that point I was beyond being shy and just wanted him to take me where only he could.

He smiled at me before pushing two fingers in, hitting that special place deep inside me. I felt myself losing control, so close to that blissful edge. I kept my eyes locked on Eric's while he continued to pump furiously inside of me. He reached up and tweaked my nipple in his hand which made me lose the few strands of self control I had left.

"Please Eric, please bite me!"

He sunk his fangs into my thigh and I simply came undone. It felt like shocks were coming out every pour of my body and my heart was on fire. My walls tightened around his fingers as I came all over them.

"Erriic, ohhh Eriiic"

I collapsed down on the bed and tried to relax while the aftershocks of the orgasm coursed through my body.

"You are simply extraordinary my love. Watching the look on your face when you come is my own personal Valhalla."

He slowly removed his fingers from my core and licked them clean.

"You taste so delectable. So sweet and pure"

Watching something so sensual I was suddenly no longer satisfied and longed for a different part of my Viking. Eric must have seen the dark passion in my eyes because he was on me in an instant, kissing me for all I was worth.

It was at that particular moment that Eric's cell phone started to ring from the pocket of his pants somewhere on my bathroom floor. Any other ring tone, any other, and I wouldn't have cared but…

"Eric it's Pam. You need to make sure everything went well with obtaining Mark and the cleanup." Eric didn't seem to care about Hallow's brother or ensuring his cure from the curse. He kept kissing my neck and suckling my nipples.

"Oooh Eric, really you need to talk to her" He looked up and furrowed his brow at me trying to decided if I was serious or not.

"Go."

"Fine, but we will continue this."

"I'm going to hold you to that." I smiled at him and gently stroked his cheek with my finger. "Now hurry and call Pam back." It took all my willpower to let him get out of bed before feeling him inside me. A few seconds later his voice drifted into the room from the bathroom. I could only hear Eric's side of the conversation, but it didn't sound good. The longer he and Pam talked the quieter his voice became. I was starting to feel extremely anxious. I was tired of vampire drama bullshit, this was probably going to be exactly the kind of thing I shouldn't be letting myself get involved in.

 _'Please, please don't let anything be wrong.'_

"Come here, now. We will discuss this in further detail." Eric said before hanging up the phone and coming back to bed.

"What's wrong? What's going on? Is everyone ok?" Eric looked up at me and the concern and confusion in his eyes scared the beejeesus out of me.

"What is it?"

"The witches' brother managed to escape. He used some spell to cover his scent so we couldn't track him. As you know we killed Hallow as she was too dangerous to keep alive, so my only hope of regaining my memory is gone. It's gone!"

At that moment I didn't know whether to burst into tears or be ridiculously happy for a little more time with my Eric. Vaguely I knew this could only be disastrous for my emotional well being, and deep in the pit of my stomach I had a feeling that my world was about to be turned upside down by vampires, again. My heavens….

* * *

 _Sadly I know if you've already reviewed this chapter you won't be able to do so again. However, for those of you rereading this you could still send me a message letting me know what you think of the changes :K_

 _For those of you who just started reading my story please do hit that little blue button...then keep reading!_


	2. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  _Well, I got 1 review so far and it was positive lol. wootwoot! I'm still looking for a beta so bear with me until that happens. My spelling is ok and my sentences are readable, but my punctuation can be a bit off. I'm quite proud of myself for getting this chapter up to 2,000 words! My goal is to someday write 4,000 word chapters with ease...someday._

_Well, I got 1 review so far and it was positive lol. wootwoot! I'm still looking for a beta so bear with me until that happens. My spelling is ok and my sentences are readable, but my punctuation can be a bit off. I'm quite proud of myself for getting this chapter up to 2,000 words! My goal is to someday write 4,000 word chapters with ease...someday._

 _Please review! Thank you to racecz5 for pointing out my obvious confusion in the time line- got it fixed :)_

 _Disclaimer: While I would love it if Eric was MINE, he's not...I just dream! (the other characters aren't mine either)_

* * *

Deciding the mood was absolutely ruined I threw on my fuzzy pink bathrobe and left Eric sitting on my bed. He looked so shocked and deep in thought I decided he needed some time to himself. I puttered into the kitchen to make some coffee while I thought about what this could mean for me, for us. As the coffee started dripping I slumped down into a chair at the table. Honestly, I felt utterly shell shocked. I was sitting in this very chair not an hour ago crying over the loss of my Eric and now I had my wish. I couldn't help but think of the old phrase 'be careful what you wish for'. 'What would happen to Area 5? What if the Queen decides to punish Eric? What if she takes him away from here, from me?' I felt my heart grow cold at that possibility. Not only did the thought of Eric leaving me scare me to death- the fact that it frightened me so much scared me to death! After what Bill put me through I knew better than to let my heart go so easily, but here I was leaving my heart and soul to Eric's mercy.

The sound of the coffee pot beeping brought me out of my pity party. I put two bottles of true blood in the microwave before pouring myself a cup of coffee. I leaned against the counter trying to understand what was happening. Eric walked in wearing only his jeans and gave me a weak smile. It really upset me seeing him so lost. I was ready for the calm, confident, arrogant Eric that has 1,000 of experience and would know just what to do to come back.

"Pam should be here soon Lover. I'm sorry I didn't keep my promise to you, we will make up for it later" He winked at me and gave me his trademark smirk.

"Eric Northman how can you be thinking about sex at a time like this?" Though seeing him in just his jeans did do wonders to my libido regardless of what was going on around us. I was suddenly very sad and grumpy Pam had to pick that moment to deliver the horrible news.

"I think about sex with you all the time Sookie. " I rolled my eyes at his ridiculous statement, mainly because I knew he was probably telling the truth. We both sat down at my table and stared at each other. I was hoping that at any second he would come up with a brilliant plan and everything would be ok again. But, it would seem like he was once again at a loss.

"Don't worry Eric, Pam will know what to do." A low growl rumbled through his chest.

"I'm tired of relying on my child. I'm her master! I'm the Sheriff of Area 5. I'm willing to leave it for you of course, but while I'm in a position of power I should be acting like I know what I'm doing." He let out a huge sigh of frustration and pounded his fist down on the table. I felt a twinge of pain again at the mention of him leaving everything for me. If he only knew how unlikely that was.

I covered his large hand with my small one. "Eric, we're going to find Hallow's brother. We'll get you back to normal and then you can go back to all your duties as Sheriff. We'll put all of this behind us."

Eric was kneeling in front of me before I finished my last sentence "We will never put this behind us Sookie, you are MINE now." The way he said 'mine' just made me burst into a fit of giggles.

"And what do you find so funny about that, lover?" He was glaring at me with a look that made him appear like the scary vampire he really was. While I should have been terrified, it only caused me to laugh harder. Hey, they don't call me crazy Sookie for nothing! "You just sounded like…like yourself! That is so… so something Sheriff Eric would say!" I managed to croak out in-between giggles.

"Well I'm glad I amuse you so much." His head turned towards the door and I knew Pam was about to arrive. I stepped around Eric, got the True Bloods out of the microwave and set them on the table. As Eric seated himself I went and answered the door.

"Good evening Pam"

Pam looked me up and down with a fangy grin and I was suddenly very aware I was still only wearing my fuzzy pink bathrobe.

"Well hello Sookie. You look scrumptious this evening. I didn't interrupt you and my Master did I?" The glint in her eye seemed to say she was wishing she would have walked in on the said something.

"No Pam, your call kind of ruined the mood" I didn't mean to sound so sarcastic but my words came out short and clipped.

"You know Sookie, it's quite a treat you not wearing anything underneath that robe" She winked at me as she passed by and sat at the table. I blushed bright red from head to toe as the realization of what she said sunk in. 'Stupid vampire senses!' Pulling together what was left of my self-respect I went to join Eric and Pam at my table.

"Pam, explain. How could that witch get away?" Eric may not be his usual self, but I was exceedingly (thanks word of the day calendar!) glad I was not on the receiving end of the glare he was fixing on Pam right then. It didn't seem to faze her though.

"During the commotion of the battle he slipped out into the darkness. After killing Hallow we followed Mark's scent through the streets, but then it was simply gone. I smelled magic in the air and we assume he used some sort of spell to mask his scent."

"What is your plan to find him?"

I saw frustration and worry come across Pam's face, but it disappeared just as quickly as it appeared. "Master, we don't know how to find him. We already searched everywhere they stayed and spoke with all of his known associates. It's as if he's disappeared without a trace."

My heart felt like it was in a vice-grip and I couldn't breathe. There was not any easy solution to this problem. Eric looked over at me with burdened eyes. "Sookie do you think that wiccan friend of yours could help us?"

Pam chimed in. "Yes, what about tracking the witch? Could your friend help with that? If we can find him we will either get him to reverse the spell or tell us what it was so we can fix it ourselves." Eric nodded to confirm this was a good course of action. Both Vampire eyes were focused on me and I was beginning to feel very uncomfortable being responsible for finding the answer to this problem.

"Listen guys, I don't know. Mark is very strong and Holly has never actually practiced magic in that sense" Pam looked bored and annoyed with my lack of helpful information. Before anyone could try to push me further for a solution I turned to Pam to move the conversation along to other import matters. "Pam, what's going to happen Area 5? How much longer can we keep this a secret from the Queen?"

"I've been running Area 5 without any complications. I am vampire Sookie." She twirled her hair and gave me a sarcastic look before leaning forward. "However, the Queen could be a problem. Eric now that you are in no immediate danger you should come back to your home and Fangtasia to try and play the part."

My heart wretched and I wanted to tell Pam that was a stupid idea and he should stay here just in case. But I knew that wasn't true, I simply didn't want to see the man I cared for, maybe even love, leave me. I looked up to Eric's face to see him struggling over the decision.

"Eric, your Area needs you and trust me, you don't want to mess with the Queen. You should go. I need you to go." He looked at me as if I had just driven a stake through his heart.

"Pam, leave us"

"Aw, can't I watch you and the human play?"

"Pamela!"

"Yes Master." Pam dipped her head and went to wait for him outside.

"Lover, do you wish me away so easily? Do I mean so little to you?"

His words hit a nerve, I was so tired of being the responsible one! "Of course not Eric! Of course I don't want you to leave, I never want to loose the person you've become or what we have. Of course I don't want you to become Sheriff Eric and forget about me. Of course I want you to stay, I love you! But you can't, because if the Queen punishes you because I was selfish I could never forgive myself, and because it wouldn't be real! You're not yourself right now!" I felt my heart shattering into pieces as I realized what I said was true. I did love my vampire, but he could never love me back. I would never have what my heart wanted most. I couldn't help myself as the tears started to fall.

Eric took me in his arms and stroked my back. "Sookie, my love, my Valkerie, my goddess, I love you too" he whispered in my ear. My entire body stiffened at his words. 'Love? Did he just say he loved me?' I snapped my head up to see it confirmed in his eyes. There was so much love and desire reflected in them I thought I would drown. Eric gently licked the tears off my face before placing gentle kisses all over. I sighed deeply and relaxed into his embrace.

"You still have to go back Eric."

"I know lover. I must go if only to protect you from this Queen you all speak in fear of." I looked up and smiled at him. "I'll miss you Eric."

"I will only be gone long enough to get things taken care of, then I'll come back for you. I promise" I wanted to tell him to not make promises he couldn't keep, but I didn't want to ruin the moment.

"Dawn is soon approaching. I would worship your body until the sun came up if I could my lover, but if I'm going to return to my life I want to leave with Pam tonight so she can explain some things to me." I wished with all my might he could stay. I felt scared and like my heart was about to walk out the door with this man, some affirmation would have been nice before all hell broke loose. Before I walked him to the door I squeezed him tight, never wanting to let go.

Eric smiled at me and gave me a searing hott, toe curling kiss. "I'll see you soon lover." He winked at me before descending the porch steps to where Pam stood waiting. I waved goodbye to both of them then went back inside. As soon as the door clicked shut I felt pieces of myself flying everywhere. I dumped the untouched True Blood in the sink before I climbed into my bed and hid underneath the covers. All I wanted was for the night to be over. I let the exhaustion of the evening take over and pull me into a deep sleep.

Sometime the next morning I woke up with a feeling of panic ripping through my body and large hands wrapped around my throat….

* * *

 _Yes, a cliffie :) give me a review and I'll try to get the next chapter out tomorrow!_


	3. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ' _I don't know why this little bitch is so important, but she was the first one in, and her death will be payback to the Viking.'_

' _I don't know why this little bitch is so important, but she was the first one in, and her death will be payback to the Viking.'_

I saw my attackers' lips turn up into a blood-curdling smile as I heard what was in his dark, wicked mind. _'Someone has to pay for what happened to my Sister!'_ I was kicking and squirming trying to get out from his bear claw embrace. I was starting to feel lightheaded. A picture of Hallow flashed through his mind, and I instantly knew that my attacker was Mark, Hallow's brother. Was this really it? After all I'd been through, was a crazy were-witch going to be the death of me?

"I'm going to enjoy watching the light go out of your eyes, bitch. No vampire can protect you now." He snarled at me. I could feel myself slipping into unconsciousness, but the Stackhouses don't go down without a fight! I thought of my Gran in her final moments and wondered if this is how she felt, knowing the end was coming but not being able to do much about it.

In my head, I kept screaming over and over for him tojust release his hold on me even a little bit. His face showed surprise and as if in an answer to prayers his hands didn't seem to grip me quite as hard. Mark was extremely strong though, the evidence showing in the muscles that rippled down his arm as he tried to squeeze the life out of me. 'Please just move so I can get my arm out. Move, move MOVE!' Mark froze atop me looking like a deer in the headlights. Whatever distracted him gave me enough time to squirm out my right arm and I began to furiously scratch at his hands, arms, whatever I could reach to make him get off me. Apparently I only managed to upset him, his eyes narrowed and burrowed into my own like a hunter locking onto its target. 'Please, please stop this! I don't want to die, not like this- stop!' . Mark's face looked completely surprised, and it suddenly all clicked into place. The reason it seemed my prayers were being answered is because Mark was hearing what I was saying, I was projecting my will to him. 'Well that's .' I didn't want to miss my opportunity so I wiggled around until I could get a little leverage. I extended my leg and used as much force as possible to shove me knee into his groin. His features contorted into pain and his grip on my throat loosened. I took a gasp of air and moved quickly before my window of opportunity closed.

Quickly, I rolled over and pushed him off the side of the bed as I jumped up and tried to run for my car. I almost fell over from the sudden movement and the obvious lack of oxygen. I grabbed onto the doorframe to steady myself and took some slow deep breaths. Mark began stirring on the floor, and after a few antagonizing seconds, one hand, then another, grabbed onto the bed, and he pulled himself up. The pain on his face had been replaced with a forceful look of pure hatred and anger. It took all my self control not to dash out of the room at that moment, but I knew I needed a few more minutes to steady myself before I made a run for help; passing out wouldn't give me much of a chance at escaping, and the room was still spinning.

"You're going to pay for that you vampire-loving cunt! I had planned on just killing you, but now I'm going to make you wish you were never born!" Mark was projecting loud and clear exactly what he had in store for me. Boy, was I tired of being almost raped and killed. I shut out his vile mental images and decided it was now or never. I dashed from my room, grabbed my keys and phone from the kitchen table, and ran outside to my car. I could hear Mark trying to follow behind me and prayed that I had slowed him down enough to get a head start. I jumped into the car and skidded out of the driveway. Looking back in my rearview mirror, I saw Mark stumbling out of my house looking very pissed off.

' _Now what to do? I can't go to Fangtasia; I would just be a sitting duck. I don't want to lead Mark to Sam or to any of my friends_.' I let out a sigh, and it hit me just how close I had actually come to dying. The adrenaline was wearing off and the tears were starting to pour out. I pulled over to the side of the road and just let them come. I knew I needed to keep going, but I couldn't see well enough to drive. I took a deep breath, tried to steady my hands and stop the tears from spilling.

' _It's going to be ok, Sookie. You can do this. You escaped, and you're safe for now. All you have to do is make it until tonight, then Eric and Pam can protect you. Suck. It. Up._ ' With a deep breath and a new resolve, I started driving again . . . going I don't even know where.

Absentmindedly, I ended up in Shreveport and continued to drive around for a while. Besides going to Fangtasia a few times, I'd never really explored this city so besides being terrified that Mark had somehow followed me, I did actually enjoy myself. Shreveport really was a beautiful place. While Bon Temps was your typical backwater southern town, Shreveport was a big and bustling city. The Red River was truly a pretty site with all the large casinos lining the water's edge; it was such a travesty that the river was so polluted from the regular bustle of the people who didn't care. While this place didn't have a small-town feel it seemed to have a life of its own- people here were all part of the cities culture and thrived in it together. I preferred my small town home; mainly because being in a big city made it hard to block out everyone's thoughts, but if I was ever going to move, I decided this is where I would go. ' _Maybe that has more to do with the company available here?_ ' I couldn't believe I'd just thought that. ' _Oh hell. Eric and I have a few good days and I'm already thinking about wanting to be with him, like_ live _with him?_ I never even thought about that with Bill. What is my problem?'

While I made a firm resolve not to think about Eric, and in that situation, I couldn't control the stream of images of me and Eric together at his house, laughing, sitting in front of the fire every night—the amazing sex we would surely have. ' _No, no, no! Don't do that to yourself. You know as soon as Mark is caught and the spell is reversed he won't care for you anymore!_ ' My chest felt so heavy, and my eyelids were feeling droopy; I didn't get much sleep last night. Taken over with exhaustion my head started to droop, which is when I noticed my gas tank was almost empty. 'Sheesh, can nothing go right today?'.I stopped at a gas station to fill up and make some phone calls. Considering what happened this morning, I knew I couldn't go to work this evening; I couldn't put my friends in harms' way. I wasn't looking forward to asking Sam for more time off though.

"Hey, Sook, how are you?" Sam's cheery voice rang in my ears.

"Hey, Sam. Look, I'm really sorry, but I'm going to need some time off. Apparently Hallow's brother Mark escaped, and he tried to attack me this morning. Don't worry, I'm fine but I don't want to attract him to you guys or the bar. I'm going to try to help Eric and Pam find him so we can put this all behind us."

I heard him sigh heavily, and I just knew he was vehemently shaking his head on the other end of the line. "Damn it, Sook, how do you end up managing to get yourself in so much trouble? What can I do to help, cher?"

"Well, Sam, I don't think anything right now. I don't want anyone getting hurt on my account, and Mark is using some kind of masking spell so he can't be tracked."

"Of course he is . . . well let me know if I can do anything. You can have the days off, just be careful, cher." I could hear the warmth and concern in his voice. He may give me a hard time too often, but Sam really was a good friend where it counted.

"Thanks, Sam. I'll try to keep you updated on what's going on. I'll talk to you later."

"Bye, Sook" I hung up and got out to pump the gas. I paid the homely looking women inside the gas station, then headed back to my car. When I was almost there a tingle ran up my spine, and I froze in my tracks. Normally, I let the thoughts of people's minds flow over me, but this was the same mental signature and horrible thoughts I got from my attacker earlier in the day. I could tell he was getting closer, but I couldn't see him anywhere.

' _This bitch is so stupid. Doesn't she know I'm a witch? No matter where she goes, I can find her. I'll track her to the ends of the earth to ensure her death. Hallow will receive justice!'_

Figuring I didn't have much time to get away, I jumped in my car and did my best to calmly and coolly drive away. I felt completely lost and desperate; there was nothing I could do, nowhere I could go to escape Mark. I was beginning to doubt my ability to stay alive until dark. A new wave of panic and tears started to take over me. I continued to drive the streets of Shreveport nervously checking my review mirror every five seconds in an attempt to stay as far away from my tormentor as possible.

' _Come to me, Child'_

I jumped about five feet off the seat and slammed on my breaks. Luckily there wasn't anyone behind me, or I would have caused a serious accident. Looking around my car, I realized I was definitely still alone. ' _Maybe I'm going crazy?_ '

' _I'll help protect you, come to me.'_

I finally realized that the voice was inside my head. Someone was contacting me telepathically. Two new

realizations of my telepathic capabilities in one day was a bit overwhelming. I looked around to see if I

could tell where the thoughts were coming from. Feeling and seeing nothing, I started driving again and

feel an almost gravitational pull directing me to the southern side of Shreveport. When I pulled up to a

stoplight heading out of town my head whipped around to a shopping center to my right. Compared to

the new shiny buildings in the center of the city this place looked like a dump; paint was chipping of in

large chunks and the roof looked like it could collapse at any moment. There was only a single car in the

parking lot and most of the suites in the building looked unoccupied. Overall there was an intense

foreboding feeling coming from all around the shopping center. If I hadn't felt drawn to this place I

probably never would have seen it much less think my salvation could me found somewhere inside.

Everything inside me screamed at me to step on the gas and drive as far from here as I could, but

something wouldn't let me.

' _Yes, I'm here. Come, Child.'_

I pulled into the deserted parking lot and turned off my car. ' _What am I doing? Some supernatural being is communicating to me telepathically and I'm just going to walk in there? What if this is a trap? But do I really have any choice? The voice said she would help protect me here, but could I honestly believe that?_ ' I sat there pondering my choice when I felt fear start to invade my body.

' _Hurry, little one, the witch draws near. He will not be merciful.'_

I still didn't know if I could trust this being, but I knew that anything was better than trying to face Mark again. I jumped out of my car and ran into the only inhabited suite in the building. The small worn and tattered sign that was above the awning simply read "Hekate's." I burst through the door panting hard trying to catch my breath. I turned around to lock the door, but there was no lock. I panicked and started looking around for anything to barricade myself in. There was a shelf with candles, cloth, and all sorts of strange items on it. Carelessly, Istarted to try and drag the shelf in front of the door, not caring as things began tumbling to the floor and breaking. Suddenly, I heard laughter coming from behind me. I whipped around to see a nimble old women with long flowing silver hair coming around the corner. Her eyes met mine and it felt like she was gazing straight into my soul with her deep gray eyes clouded with age. She was dressed in what I would call gypsy, or hippie clothing; a deep blue peasant blouse covered her lumpy torso, while a brown flowing skirt gently silhouetted her generous lower curves. She was old but she projected no sign of fragility or weakness, in fact, she seemed to emanate wisdom and power.

"Oh, dear, the one you fear so much won't be kept out by a shelf!" She started laughing again and I couldn't help but feel annoyed at her seemed amusement of my fear. "Don't worry, child, he will be unable to detect you here and will definitely be unable to enter. You are safe."

"And why should I trust you?" My voice dripped with skepticism and disbelief. The old woman smiled at me. "Well of course you don't have to trust me, but I am all that is standing between you and that evil one. Come and sit, and you can explain what is going on."

She guided me over to a couple of stools behind the counter, and I got a good look at my newfound shelter. It was a small store that had an eerie magical feeling to it. There were all sorts of pagan paraphernalia like incense and herbs. My brow furrowed as I looked back to my supposed rescuer. "Before I tell you anything, tell me who you are."

"Well of course, dear. My name is as the sign says—Hekate. I'm the proud owner of this store."

"And how did you know I was in danger? How could you communicate telepathically with me? What are you?" Hekate let out a small bauble of laughter, which made her eyes look squinty and the wrinkles all over her face stand out. "So many questions little one! I try to keep track of the all those Supernatural around here. I don't like any surprises" She started to scowl at nothing in particular, and I could tell she was remembering the time long ago that had prompted her cautiousness.

Something she said didn't make sense to me. "But, I'm not a Supe" She looked up at me startled and tilted her head to the side.

"Oh, but you are my dear—at least partially. Do you not know you are a child of the Fae? A powerful bloodline I assume as well." I had no idea what in the world she was talking about and I'm guessing it was written all over my face because her curiosity immediately vanished and she changed the subject. "I could communicate telepathically with you, Sookie because I am a supe myself; my father was a demon and my mother was a psychic. I am half demon, a telepath, and a witch."

My grandmother was probably turning in her grave as I sat there with my jaw hanging down to the floor. Where were my southern manners? I slowly shut my jaw and tried to process what she had just said. "So how are you keeping Mark away from here?" She waved her hand as if to motion to something unseen. "I am a witch as well my dear. I have wards all around this location to protect myself and my patrons from anyone who wishes us harm.

I released a deep breath I didn't even realize I had been holding. _'So I'm safe. I'm actually safe here. I will live until tonight. I will see my vampire again. Grrr Sookie, you mean you will live long enough for the Vampires to help you, you have to stop thinking about Eric like that!_ '

"My dear, you're practically screaming your thoughts into my head." Hekate was chuckling again. "It's so odd, a daughter of the Fae and light being so drawn to the cold ones." She leaned in until our faces were only inches apart from each other. She was seriously creeping me out with the Fae stuff and completely invading my personal space, but I tried not move. "Could it be that you and the cold one are fated then? Such matchings are quite rare. My, my you are such an interesting little thing!" She was beginning to put me into sensory overload; I couldn't take any more information.

"Child, I'm sorry to have frightened you. I've just never met anyone quite like you. Now tell me what has transpired. How are you involved with the witch who is an abomination to our kind?" I felt myself relax considerably at the topic change, and for the next couple of hours, Hekate and I sat behind the counter and I told her everything that had happened with Hallow, Eric, the witch war, and it's terrible end with Mark escaping. I was beginning to like Hekate very much. While everything she said seemed to hold a second meaning she was being very understanding. She had a great sense of humor and seemed to take what life threw at her with grace. I tried to read her mind but it always seemed just out of reach. Being a telepath herself I figured she knew how to keep her thoughts protected from others. 'I should figure out how to do that, I spend so much time keeping other people's thoughts out I've never even considered having to protect myself from others trying to read my mind.

"My goodness, you have been through so much for someone so new to our world! Would you like something to drink dear?" Now that she mentioned it, I realized I was extremely parched from the hours of explaining our situation and all the excitement from this morning. "Yes, that would be nice, Hekate, thank you" I gave her a warm smile as she pushed off the stool and slowly walked around the corner to what I assumed was a backroom.

Being alone my mind wandered to the possibilities of having such a powerful which as an ally. I felt a stirring in my soul and I gripped the counter for support as a sudden wave of intense otherworldly anger ripped through my body and threatened to tear me apart. It wasn't coming from me though. Eric. I didn't know the time, but I realized the sun must have set. I could tell he was coming to me, getting closer by the second. My heart fluttered at the idea of him coming to me. He may not know who he was, but he could still protect me, I still trusted him explicitly with my life. ' _Sheesh, when did this happen Sookie? How did you give your heart away so easily to a man that is going to forget you in a couple weeks.?_ ' Hekate appeared around from around the corner carrying a large glass of water. "Your vampire comes for you does he not?" I couldn't help but thinking that although she was very nice, and I now thought of her as a friend,Hekate was nothing but creepy.

"Yes, he's coming. It seems he sensed my fear all day, and he woke up very angry."

A thought dawned on me, and I couldn't believe I was just now getting around to it. I took the glass of water from Hekate's hands and set it on the counter. I grabbed her hands and peered deep into her eyes. "Oh, Hekate, can you help us? Can you remove this spell from Eric? Can you give him back his memories?" Her lips turned down, and her eyes shown with sadness.

"I'm sorry, Child, but you have already been given that answer. Unless I have the exact spell that Hallow used to cast her spell there is nothing I can do."

"What about tracking Mark? Can you help us find him? He's still masking his scent and we have no way of finding him. Though he can obvious track us—or at least track me." She looked at me very confused again. "I forget that you don't understand your abilities. Is telepathy the only thing you are aware of my dear? Do you not realize you could easily find and handle Mark on your own?" Her words shook me to my core. ' _Me? Powerful? Taking on someone like Mark—no way!_ '

"I don't understand what you're talking about. What is this about being a 'Fae' how can I have so much power?"

Her eyes narrowed and she took a sudden step back from me. "I'm sorry dear one, if the fates have not supplied you the answer perhaps it is not your time to know. I would be better off to hold my tongue or suffer their wrath"

" _Sookie_! Sookie, where are you? I can't enter here, but I sensed your fear earlier. Are you alright? Who is with you? Whoever you are I will surely rip every limb from your body and drain you of blood if you have harmed a hair on my lovers head!"

Hekate's odd but beautiful laugh filled the room once more. "A protective one isn't he? He can't come in because of my wards. Come, let's show him you're ok and invite him in before he tears down my shop."

We crossed over to the door, and I pushed the shelf back to the place it was in before I frantically ripped apart Hekate's shop earlier. I opened the door, and Eric was in front of us with vampire speed and picked Hekate up by the neck. My vampire looked like death had finally gripped him; his entire body was paler than usually blood seeped out of every pore. Gone were the icy blue eyes of my dreams, replaced by deep hallows of nothingness.

"Eric! Put her down! _Now_! She saved me from Mark today. Would you kill the women who helped me?" Hekate looked calm and collected, as if she knew what was going to happen. There was no fear about her. I wondered exactl Hekate looked calm and collected, as if she knew what was going to happen. There was no fear about her. I wondered what exactly her powers included, what she was capable of.

Eric looked from me to Hekate, then set her down. He slightly bowed before her. "I am deeply sorry for my actions. I have felt Sookie's fear all day and overreacted. Thank you for protecting her when I could not."

Hekate's eyebrows shot up to her forehead. "Well you really aren'tyourself are you? An apology from a cold one, ha! I thought I'd never see the day! Please come in, Vampire." Eric took my hand, and we followed her back into the shop. We went over to the stools to sit down where Eric automatically pulled me onto his lap and wrapped his arms around me. Blood rushed to my cheeks at his blatant display of affection.

"I missed you lover. I can't explain what it was like to feel your fear so strongly in my daytime rest but not be able to protect you. I didn't rest well" he motioned to his pale skin. I smiled warmly at him. "It's alright, Eric, Hekate came to my side and kept Mark out with her wards." Eric's head turned and he examined the witch very careful. "If you can keep him away, can you lure him here or track him?"

"Yes, Vampire, I can. Though I don't offer my services for your sake, but for this Child of the Fae. I will gather the materials I need and contact the little one when I am ready. Keep her safe during the evening night stalker. And . . ." Hekate got off the stool, opened a door in the counter, and handed me a small bag. "This contains four stones. Place them at the four corners of your home, Viking, and Mark will not be able to enter. This will keep you safe during the day hours, Child."

I gave Hekate the biggest smile I could muster and gave her a super big bear hug. "Thank you so much. You have saved my life and have given me peace of mind for the upcoming days. I'll forever be grateful to you."

"Of course my dear. I will try to move things quickly to make you safe again. When you are ready to acknowledge who you truly are, I can help you develop your gifts. Remember me when the time comes."

Eric gave her and then me a perplexed look. "It would seem we have much to discuss, dear one. Let's get home so you can tell me everything and so I can show you just how happy I am that you did not meet your final death today." I blushed bright red as I took his hand and we went out to his car.

"Eric, my car is here I can't go with you in yours."

"Pam will take care of it, lover. I'm not going to leave you alone again after the raw fear I felt from you today. I want to ensure your safety this night." His words melted my heart, and I couldn't help but grin like a schoolgirl as I slipped into his bright red Corvette. I waved goodbye to Hekate as we pulled out of the lot.

As we were driving like a bat out of hell through Shreveport, I suddenly realized exactly where we were going. I was about to see Eric's house! I'd never been there before, and I wasn't sure I wanted to see it now, much less have to stay there with him—alone. My heart started beating faster, and adrenaline was coursing through my veins at an alarming rate.

"Lover, calm down. You will be safe with me." I tried taking a deep breath but still couldn't quite relax. It had been such a long day and the last thing I needed was to try and keep my feelings at bay when I was alone with my very own Viking sex god. ' _Now what have you gone and done Sookie?_ ' I contemplated the amount of self control I thought I would be able to exude with this man as we drove toward my certain emotional doom . . .


	4. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The lights of Shreveport started to fade behind us and I was surprised to see us heading toward Bon Temps.

The lights of Shreveport started to fade behind us and I was surprised to see us heading toward Bon Temps.

"Where are we going? Don't you live in Shreveport?

"No I live in between Bon Temps and Shreveport actually. Have you never been to my home?" His response reminded me that this wasn't the real Eric. He had seemed so glorious earlier trying to defend me from the non-existent threat that I almost forgot he didn't remember who he was. Disappointment swelled through me as I again realized I was going to have to figure out a way to not fall more deeply in love with him. Now that I'd already accepted the fate of Eric going back to his duties of Sheriff and forgetting about me, I was ready for it to just happen already. Letting myself care for him more was only killing me slowly.

"I have never been to your home. As far as I know Pam is the only one who comes here. Vampires are usually very protective of their nest."

"Hmm yes. Pam said not to tell anyone where I lived, but you don't count."

About halfway to Bon Temps Eric turned onto a gravel side road. We were in the middle of nowhere—nothing but trees as far as the eye could see. I shivered at the emptiness that seemed to loom out in the night. This was definitely a fitting area for a Vampire to live; so cliché.

"I hope you enjoy my home, lover." He pulled off the road into a long driveway. I couldn't see the house as it was set very far back from the road and covered by all the trees scattered across the lawn. A large black wrought iron fence went around his entire property, and we were sitting in front of a huge gate that barred entrance to his property. Eric punched some numbers into a keypad and the gate swung open. Light posts were on each side of the driveway all the way up to the house casting a ghostly glow over the evergreens growing by their side. Finally, the trees began to thin as we broke into a clearing revealing Eric's house. It was as big as five of my houses put together with huge windows. The primary color was white with deep red shutters framing all the windows. There was a very large garage set off to the right side of the house. Even though it was dark, I could tell there was a lot of extremely nice and expensive landscaping that had been done. Besides more trees surrounding the house, there was a small pond with a Greek style fountain in the middle of the circle drive. I couldn't help but gasp; it was just so breathtakingly gorgeous.

"Oh, wow, Eric! I didn't really know what to expect, but this wasn't it. Your home is so beautiful!" His face lit up like a kid on Christmas, obviously pleased I had taken such a liking to his home.

"Wait until you see the inside! I couldn't believe I lived here when Pam showed me last night. I am very wealthy!" I laughed at his exclamation.

"Yes, you are very wealthy. I suppose that comes with being alive so long." He nodded his agreement. Reaching up to the visor, he punched a little button, and one of the four garage doors opened. After putting the car in park he was at my door with Vampire speed helping me to my feet.

"Eric, I can't see anything. Human, remember?" His boisterous laugh filled the garage and it warmed me to my core. I loved hearing his laugh. I would almost consider becoming a Vampire if I knew he would laugh like that for eternity. _'Where did that come from?'_ The lights suddenly flipped on, and I reflexively covered my eyes to shield them from the sudden attack on my retinas.

"Ugh, a little warning would be nice next time." Eric's arms wrapped around my torso and I breathed a sigh of relief that I was finally safe in my Vampire's arms. I took my hands away from my eyes and placed them on his pale face. "Why are you so pale and bloody in places? Shouldn't you have started healing when the sun went down?"

"Well, I'm bloody and pale because your fear kept me awake during the day. Apparently Vampires get sick if they don't sleep. Pam told me I was a fool and she would drain you if you caused my death." His brow crinkled and his lower lip stuck out as he pouted thinking about the details Pam must have went into. I barely heard what he said next I was so focused on that lower lip and how much I wanted to suck it in between my teeth just then. _'Jesus Christ, Sheppard of Judea, this man is sex on a popsicle stick!'_

"I haven't completely healed because I need to feed. I plan on having lots of dessert later tonight though, so I'm not worried." He winked at me and lifted me off the floor in his arms to give me a heart-stopping kiss. My head felt like it was spinning, and I never wanted to come back down to earth. A kiss was never just a kiss with Eric, the warmth he brought with his tongue spread to my chest as my heart swelled with love for him, it moved to my stomach as butterflies took flight, on down to my hoohaa that was dripping with desire for him, finally the warmth spread through my legs all the way into my toes. He released me, letting me catch my breath, as he grabbed my hand and walked us further down the garage.

"These are my other cars, lover. Are they not wonderful? You can have one if you like! Or use one anytime you need." His giddiness and generosity took me back.

"I'd never take a car from you, but thank you for the offer. They are all very nice." And they were all nice. One was a tiny black convertible, which made me giggle when I thought of him trying to fold all 6'4 of him inside. The next was a huge black SUV that screamed "secret-op Vampire stuff." The last car was a simple four-door sedan in a neutral tan color. It seemed out of place, but I guess he was prepared to blend into any situation.

"Come, lover, let me show you the inside of my home." Eric picked me up in his arms before I had a chance to resist him and carried us inside the house. I would like to say that I was able to control my libido and emotions being this close to his firm perfectly sculpted chest, but I can't. I failed miserably; in fact, my hand reached up and grazed over the pectoral muscles that had first hardened after years of raw fighting before being turned into an immortal being of pure power.

Interrupting my ogling, Eric set me down in the middle of his entryway. We were just inside the front door standing in a large open room with a winding grand staircase on each side both connecting to a balcony that overlooked where we were now. Hallways led off from both sides of this room, and the balcony also seemed to have a hallway leading down the back of it.

"Now I shall give you a grand tour of my house, lover! Hopefully we won't get lost as Pam only showed me everything last night." His mouth turned up into a Cheshire cat grin, and he winked at me. We both knew that his Vampire memory wouldn't allow him to forget even if it did seem to him that he'd only been in this house once before.

"I'm really tired, it's been such a long day and I'm assuming you want to hear about it. Why don't we just sit down for a while and talk for a bit?"

"Pam is coming over soon to hear everything as well so until then, a tour!" I really didn't feel like walking all over this huge mansion and Eric was being too damn cheery after the day I'd had. Though it may have been a bit childish I humphed at him, frowned, and crossed my arms.

"Don't look so cross, I will carry you the whole way so you don't grow any more frail. You will need your strength for later." He brushed his fingers along my cheekbone and waggled his eyebrows at me before scooping me up in his arms.

Normally, I would seriously protest to being carried around like a child, but I was too tired to care. If Eric wanted me to see his house so badly, then he could go right ahead and carry me; it's not like I was heavy to him. And it definitely had nothing to do with the fact that I just wanted to be close to him after the day I had. That's what I was telling myself at least.

We started off down the hallway to the right, which led to a grandeur sitting room that smelled musty and unused. The walls were lined with ornate cherry bookcases filled with several old-looking books and sculptures from far-away lands. The walls were white in contrast to the several chairs that were a deep black velvet.

"This is where I can greet guests like the Queen. I don't like having people to my home, but if it's necessary, there is a place for us to discuss important matters." He strolled through a door in the back of the room, which opened up into something that can only be explained as a private movie theatre. The entire back wall was a giant screen, and there were speakers in each corner. Both side walls had built-in shelves that were lined with movies.

"I like this room. We could watch movies together all night in here." I stifled a yawn as I wearily smiled up at my Viking.

"I would like that, dear one." He planted a tender kiss on my lips, each cheek, and nose. "You need to eat something after your long day. Pam should be here soon with food for you."

"Oh, I'm sure she just loved you telling her to pick up human food for me." I could envision the contempt that would have been written across Pam's face. Eric's finger gently tilted my head upward so that I was forced to look into his eyes.

"You need to get used to being served. I told you that all who owe me fealty will also serve you from now on." My chest burned with pain as his words reminded me how absurd all this was. We needed to get this solved so my life could go back to normal. Falling more in love with Eric when I knew it was going to be ripped away was so stupid. I had already steeled myself for what was coming and accepted it. Now it was being drawn out, and my heart didn't know what to do. Suddenly, I didn't think it was such a good idea to be so close to Eric, I couldn't think clearly.

"Yes I know you said that, but" he interrupted me before I could finished my sentence.

"But you don't think I'll keep my promise after my memories are returned. While I'm sure it will be different, the love I feel for you could never disappear. I know you're worried, but please don't be, lover. I will love you for forever. Literally, if you like."

I glared at him as hard as I could definitely not wanting to have that conversation right now. I didn't want to become a vampire, and he knew it.

"Please put me down." He complied, and I stomped off into the next room, which turned out to be the kitchen with an adjoining dining room. Surprise overtook me as I took in the expansiveness of the room. I never would have thought a vampire would have such a nice kitchen, considering they didn't actually eat food and generally hated watching others eat. A stool at the bar was calling my name so I plopped down in it, trying not to cry. ' _What has happened to my life?'_ A huge part of me wanted to succumb to being with Eric like we had been the past couple days, but I knew better than that. I was trying to ignore the feelings I had just admitted a day earlier in order to salvage my heart. But that was before I was going to have to spend the next couple of days with him. My only choices were to give into what I was feeling and suffer the consequences or have a talk with him. There was no way I could just avoid him for the next couple days. I sighed deeply.

"Lover," Eric's voice brought me out of my internal debate. I looked up to see him casually leaning against the doorframe. _'Why does he have to be so beautiful and sweet?'_

"I know you've had a bad day, but I can tell there's something else bothering you. You've been cold and distant since I came to you tonight. Our bond is telling me you're struggling with something. Pam is almost here, but after that, we will talk. There is no reason for you to keep things from me." The doorbell rang at that moment, saving me from having to respond to Eric's accusation.

"Come." Pam was with us in the room the moment he spoke. "Let's move to the sitting room so Sookie can be more comfortable." Pam snickered at me and rolled her eyes as we all walked to the other room and sat down. Eric sat on the couch, and I know he expected me to sit with him, but I couldn't handle being so close to him so I took the other armchair next to the one Pam occupied. Eric raised an eyebrow at me but fortunately didn't insist I join him.

"Sookie, what happened today?"

Although I was tired and just wanted to sleep I spent the next half hour explaining how I woke up with Mark's hands around my neck and how I got away.

"You willed Mark to do things, Sookie? So you're more valuable that we thought. Interesting."

"I'm oh so happy to give you guys more reason to want to use me." Venom covered every word I spewed at Pam, but I didn't care.

"Sookie, I would never treat you like property. I'm just glad you were able to protect yourself." crooned Eric. "Do you have any idea how or why you are able to practically glamour people?"

Hesitantly, I explained how Heketa contacted me telepathically and our conversations once I got there. "She said I was a child of the 'Fae' and from a powerful blood line, but she wouldn't explain it further to me."

As soon as the words were out of my mouth, the room erupted into chaos. Pam was before me with her fangs extended, strong arms crushing me into the sofa, and her mouth descending to my throat. Her eyes shone with hatred, and in that moment, I knew I was staring death in the face for the second time that day. Just as fast as Pam was before me she was suddenly across the room, thrown into a bookshelf by Eric. He picked her up by the throat and shoved her against the wall. My Viking may not remember who he was, but he still looked absolutely glorious in all his ferocity; his currently black eyes were ablaze with anger, his fangs were fully descended, and a low snarl was emanating from his chest. Even in his weakened state he was still much stronger than Pam.

"How dare you attack my lover! I should end you now. Explain yourself!"

Pam looked at me while she talked and the coldness in her eyes chilled me to the bone. She reminded me of how viscous and dangerous Vampires really were at their core— regardless of what they pretended to be on the outside.

"Didn't you hear her? She's party Faery!"

"Perhaps you've forgotten that I don't have my memories, but I do not know what a Fae or Faery is."

"Faeries are very magical creatures that only occasionally cross the plain of their world into ours. They are very cunning and tricky. Vampires and faeries went to war a few hundred years ago and the losses on each side was tragic. If that human is part Fae, and part royal Fae at that, she is nothing but trouble. Her blood would have addictive qualities, which would explain why she attracts so much trouble and why you're so pussy whipped by her. I only acted to save you. Master, you're not yourself right now. I'm sure you would do the same if you only knew what this meant."

Meanwhile, my heart was shattering into a million pieces. I'd just found out I was part some weird supernatural being I didn't even know existed and my blood was addictive. Not only was what I had with Eric not real because of his memory, but because my blood was what attracted him to me. Tears started flowing down my cheeks uncontrollably. The events of the day were far too much for me to bear.

"She is not to be harmed, regardless of what she is. She is to be treated as my equal. I suggest you remember who is in charge here." Eric tightened his grip on Pam's throat even further. "Do you understand me?"

"Yes. I understand." He dropped her to the floor then picked me up and set me down on his lap on the couch. He whispered to me, "Lover, I'm sorry but I must finish briefing Pam before we retire for the evening." I was so numb that I just nodded and curled myself into his chest.

"Sit, Pam, and I'll tell you the rest of it." She gathered herself off the floor and went back to her chair. "After I arrived Heketa told us that she can track the witch. She is gathering the materials needed and will call Sookie when everything is ready to go. What do you propose we do when we catch him?"

"We need to get him to talk, but we don't want him casting any more spells. I think we should incapacitate his ability to speak immediately and use Sookie to get it out of his mind. That would reduce the danger for all of us."

"Sookie, are you okay with helping us?" I looked up at Eric and tried to gather my strength to finish this conversation so I could finally drift into oblivion. "I'm not sure. He's also a were, and they're harder for me to read. Hekate is a telepath though. Maybe we can do it together." Eric gave me a big smile and seemed to beam with pride for me. "Yes, that is a great idea, lover. With that solved it's time for Sookie to get some rest. Pamela, please put the human food in the kitchen and leave us."

Pam stood and dipped her head low in front of Eric. "Yes, Master"

I must have fallen asleep as Eric was carrying us to his sleeping chambers because the next thing I knew I was waking up in a very dark room with a cold, dead-to-the-world Vampire by my side. I looked at the clock on the nightstand to see it was 2:00 in the afternoon. My insides were still numb, and I couldn't tell where my heart was, so I decided to go back to sleep. I knew Eric and I were going to have to talk and things were probably never going to be the same between us, but for now, I drifted back to sleep wrapping my arms around the man that filled my heart with warmth and love while simultaneously tearing it into a million pieces.


	5. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cold lips trailing down my neck and back woke me out of my beautiful deep, dark sleep. Disappointment washed over me as I realized I was going to have to face all the things sleep had helped me to evade. My body tensed under Eric's ministrations not sure how to react anymore. I had never felt more conflicted and torn in my life. Deciding we had better talk before my body betrayed me, I wiggled away from him and sat up in bed.

Cold lips trailing down my neck and back woke me out of my beautiful deep, dark sleep. Disappointment washed over me as I realized I was going to have to face all the things sleep had helped me to evade. My body tensed under Eric's ministrations not sure how to react anymore. I had never felt more conflicted and torn in my life. Deciding we had better talk before my body betrayed me, I wiggled away from him and sat up in bed.

"I'm sorry, but we need to talk before sex happens. Please turn on a light."

His weight lifted off the bed, and I heard him moving around the room. "Shield your eyes." The smirk in his voice was obvious, but I quickly covered my eyes just as the room became fully illuminated. Red and black splashed the walls and was the main color scheme for his bedroom. I was sitting on a huge California King four-poster cherry wood bed with black satin sheets. Ornate swords covered the walls along with other items I assumed were parts of Eric's history. He rejoined me on the bed keeping a relatively safe distance between us. Cautiously, he reached for my hand while searching my face for the answer to my distance.

"Did I do something to upset you? Are you mad I didn't come to protect you from the witch? I wanted to. You have no idea how hard it was not to come to you regardless of the consequences to myself." The worry and pain etched into his pale face tore through my heart.

"No! Of course not. It's just that the other night when you left my house I cried myself to sleep because I knew I was losing you. When you go back to being yourself, what we have right now will cease to matter—no matter how much you think you'll still love me. But you know what, I had accepted that. I started to mourn for what I had lost, but now here I am, stuck with having to be around you for who knows how long as a reminder of what I'm going to eventually loose. The pain is killing me slowly. I just want it to be over with." Despair filled me, and Eric's face became more contorted in pain with every word I spoke.

His words came in barely a whisper. "Am I such a monster when I'm my 'usual' self. Do you fear me, Sookie? What have I done that would make you think I'm so incapable of loving?"

"The only thing you have ever pursued me for is my body and my talent. Besides your odd relationship with Pam, I have never seen an ounce of affection come out of you. You're known to be very cunning and merciless to those who cross you."

"But what have I done to you, Sookie, that tells you I'm incapable of love? Have you never considered that I have to be cunning and deceptive in order to survive? I doubt that just because my memories have been erased I've lost all that I am. You have seen proof of my intact ability to fight and many of my mannerisms. Do you truly believe that who I am now is not even a small part of the Eric you know?"

His words rammed into me like a freight train. ' _Could he really be capable of love, Sheriff Eric? Is there a possibility that the gifts and attention had been more than a sexual conquest?_ ' My skin shivered at the prospect of actually having a relationship with Eric.

"I've never thought of it that way. You've never done anything to specifically show my either way, so I'm not sure."

The worry remained in his eyes but a smile danced upon his lips as he grabbed my hand and pulled me from the bed.

"I didn't get to feed you before you passed out last night. Before we discuss anything further let's make sure you have nourishment." Relief swelled in me at his words. I needed some time to think about what he had said. My brain was feverishly trying to recall any time Eric had shown that he was capable of love. I'd always thought everything he did was some part of a chess game in order to make me one of his assets. _'Could I have been wrong? But what about the addictive blood thing? I can't just forget about that!'_

A click sounded from the far wall, and a large metal door swung open. Eric guided us a long flight of stairs that led to a platform behind another large metal door. He punched some numbers into a keypad and pushed the door open. To my surprise, we stepped out into the middle of the movie center.

Reading the surprise on my face Eric said,"My sleeping chambers also have another exit that leads to the woods outside in case I need to escape or enter when I have company."

He led us into the kitchen and started to pull things out of the refrigerator.

"Did you put the stones around the house before you went to rest for the day?"

"Yes, of course I did. I wouldn't want to risk your safety when I was incapable of protecting you."

Thankfully, the next few minutes passed by in silence while he continued to pour things into a bowl. I couldn't believe he was actually cooking for me. It was so weird to see a Vampire handling human food. I tried not to laugh as he misgauged his strength and not only slaughtered the boiled egg he was trying to crack, but also broke the bowl he was using. I would bet there's now a dent in his marble countertop as well. He retrieved a new bowl from a high cabinet and tried again being much gentler this time around. While peeling the shells of the boiled egg pieces of the shell stuck to his fingers. His brow furrowed as he furiously tried to flick the shell of his fingers. Obviously they didn't go anywhere which only made Eric angrier. Laughter started to escape my throat in small gasps, he turned around and gave me a death stare which promptly stopped me laughter. The rest of his cooking went smoothly and eventually he placed a plate in front of me with a egg salad sandwich on it. His face was full of pride at his accomplishment.

"I watched you make this for yourself when we were at your home, I thought you might want something familiar."

"Thank you." From all the stress the past couple days I didn't have an appetite, but I knew I needed my strength. After I finished the surprisingly delicious sandwich ,I washed the plate and left it in the sink. Eric and I stared each other down, neither wanting to break the tension that hung thick in the air. Looking into his now icy blue eyes, I realized how much I'd missed them. He must have had a true blood some time after I fell asleep.

Finally, I broke the silence, "Eric, regardless if you're capable of love or not, I don't even think we can be sure the past couple of days are real. I mean, you heard what Pam said about my blood being addictive. I'm sure that's the only reason you feel so connected to me." While my words in the bedroom seemed to wound Eric, this time they only made him very angry. He was towering over me pushing me back into the wall, his fangs fully descended.

"How can you keep questioning me, woman? I have shown you in every single way I can that I love you from every part of my very old, non-beating heart. Your fae blood is of no consequence to me. I'm as patient as I can be. I've shared things with you in the past week that I'm confident I have not shared with many. How can you deny this? Stop toying with me. No more excuses!"

Perhaps it was because of the day I had yesterday or because of all the traumatic situations I'd been through, but Eric's aggressive stance scared me to death. I barely registered what he was saying while I did my best not to move or breathe. Anger emanated from Eric, and I was worried he might actually forget his strength and hurt me or something. _'I wish none of this happened. I wish more than anything I was in my own bed, safe at home. Why can't I just go home!'_

I felt a slight breeze blow through my hair encouraging me to open my eyes. My eyelids fluttered open to reveal that I was no longer in Eric's kitchen; I was sitting in the middle of my bed. I couldn't understand what had just happened. How did I get here? Did Mark bring me here? The hair on my neck bristled at the possibility of being alone with Mark again. Taking in my surroundings, I realized my room was an absolute mess. Clothes were thrown all over the room, my perform bottles from my dresser were shattered on the floor, and overall, it looked like a tornado had gone through my room. _'Or an anger were-witch.'_

Cautiously, I crawled out of bed and tiptoed around the house. Every room was a complete disaster with my belongings scattered everywhere. It dawned on me that I was being utterly stupid, investigating my torn up house when I still didn't know who brought me here. I paused in the hallway to let me shields down and scan my house. A low thrum was reverberating in my kitchen. From the reddish snarl of his thoughts, I knew it was Mark. I held my breath as I crept back up to my bedroom to try and call Eric for help. With every step I took, I knew Mark was going to hear me and come running. I was only a few feet from death, trying to slip through its grasp.

I slipped into my bedroom and locked the door, just as I heard Mark leave the kitchen and walk into the hallway.

"Hmm, what's this? I smell a Vampire-loving bitch. Come home to play did you?" Adrenaline filled my blood as I frantically picked up the phone to dial Eric, but the phone was dead and—inconveniently—I didn't have my cell phone on me when I poofed here. "My only question is how you got in here without me knowing. You're quite the cunning little annoyance. But don't worry, you won't escape me this time."

' _If he didn't bring me here, than who did and why?'_ I didn't have much time to ponder that idea because Mark kicked my door in and was barreling towards me. Instinctively, I threw my hands out in front of me to try and stop him. I closed my eyes waiting for the impact, but it never came. When I opened them, I saw a very shocked Mark pinned to the wall with a look of pain glowing in his hateful eyes. My hands looked like they were glowing and felt all tingly. _'Did I do that? Did I actually push a strong were away from me? What is going on?'_

"What the fuck? What are you?"

We both stared at my hands until the glow started to slowly fade from my palms. A grin pulled the corners of my mouth up; I was safe for now. I slowly walked over to Mark and put my hand on his shoulder. I could feel the power rolling underneath my skin. I looked into his eyes and tried to invade his mind. _'You will not harm me.'_ His eyes grew wide as saucers, and his body started to tremble underneath my touch. The air around him started to shimmer, and before I knew it, Mark was gone and he was in his large burly wolf form. He tried to lunge at me, but it was as if something unseen was holding him in place. He growled ferociously at me before turning around and bolting from the room. I ran after him to the porch only to watch the dark void of the tree line swallow his wolf figure. _'Wow. Just wow! This is too much. Why am I just now able to do these things? What's going on?'_

My heart grew warmer, and I felt a sense of peace and happiness filling my being. Eric was close. _'Och, I bet he was worried. I must have just popped out the room.'_

"Hi, Eric, I'm ok don't worry." He floated down next to me and pulled me into a deep embrace. "I'm so sorry I scared you. I never want you to fear me, lover. Please forgive me!" He nuzzled his face into my hair and froze. "Why do you smell of the witch? Is he here?" His eyes scanned our surroundings and nostrils flared at Mark's scent.

"He was here. I thought he brought me here with a spell or something, but it seemed I actually surprised him. He took out his anger on my Gran's home."

"Where is he now, Sookie? What's happened here?"

"I wish I knew, Eric. I magically show up in my room, and the next thing I know Mark is banging in the door. He was flying at me and I put my hands out. Suddenly he was across the room and my hands were glowing. I was so scared, but I wanted to see if my glamour thing would work, so I laid my hand on his shoulder and told him he couldn't hurt me. He looked really scared and then shifted. He took off into the woods before anything else could happen."

"You subdued a were? A Vampire blood-drinking were all by yourself? How is that possible?"

I didn't know the answer to that myself. I was so grateful to be alive, but power is the last thing I wanted. My telepathy was reason enough for vampires and other supes to feel the need to posses me; these additional curses were only going to make things worse. Breathing deeply, I looked into Eric's eyes. "I'm not sure. Hekate told me I could find and handle Mark on my own. For whatever reason, this being a Fae thing is starting to show itself. I don't want this, Eric, it's going to give people more of a reason to hunt me down."

"Or it could be a better way to protect yourself. Will you please come back with me, I know I frightened you but it won't happen again. I want to keep you safe, if that means allowing you your space, then I'll do that."

I smiled at him, but it didn't reach my eyes. _'He's even willing to give me space if that's what I want. Why does he have to be so wonderful? I'm not sure how much longer I can keep from acting on my feelings.'_

"Yes, I'll go back with you. I know you won't hurt me, Eric, it's just that with all I've been through, I couldn't help but feel afraid." He brushed a tendril of loose hair behind my ear as he delved into my eyes with his own blue ones, completely filled with love.

"I still promise it will not happen again. Have we ever flown together?" A puzzled look crossed my face, why was he asking such a stupid question?

"I don't think so, why?"

"I'd like to fly us home. Hold me tight and don't worry, I have you." It dawned on me what exactly he meant by fly us home. I gulped and grabbed onto his waist. My feet lifted from the ground, and before I knew it, we were flying over the Louisiana countryside toward Eric's home. Flying with Eric was such an exhilarating feeling that I didn't even have time to be scared. The wind whipped over our faces and blew my hair around my face. Eric was graceful and swift as he soared through the air. I knew I was safe with him so I relaxed and took in the beauty of the lights from Bon Temps and Shreveport. After only a few short minutes, we slowly descended onto Eric's front porch.

"Wow, that was amazing. Flying with you is so . . ."

"Sensual?" The word rolled of Pam's tongue like the purr of a cat. She strolled up to us and stood by Eric's side. "Master, Sookie." She zeroed in on Eric with a death glare. "I hope he's right in his decision to keep you around. I still think it's a bad idea, but I won't attack you in the future." Her words didn't really make me feel better, but at least I had one less enemy to worry about. We all went into the sitting room to discuss the night's strange events. I opted to sit by Eric this time, and the stupid grin on his face told me he was very pleased by my decision. I explained to Pam everything that had happened and asked her what she thought about it all.

"It's good that he's still staying in the area. His thirst for vengeance over the dead witch is clouding his judgment. As far as you popping into your bedroom, you probably did that yourself. Faeries can go wherever they like with a snap of the fingers. Was something happening that made you feel like you were in danger?" Blood rushed to my cheeks, and my eyes fell to the floor.

"Eric and I were . . . having a disagreement."

Pam's wind chime laughter filled the small room. I looked up at her in surprise, I don't think I'd ever heard Pam actually laugh. She's so dry and sarcastic most of the time. "So big bad Eric scared you? Not everything is ok with you two lovebirds? You know, Dear Abby would say—" But Eric cut her short with a look that said not to mess with him.

"Pamela we are fine, and our relationship is not of your interest except to help Sookie with anything she needs just as you serve me."

Pam stood abruptly and hovered over Eric. "I can't wait to have you back, Master, this lovey dovey bullshit is starting to get on my nerves. Notify me when we can start the hunt." With that she was gone—much to my relief.

"She is far too much trouble." He was pouting again, and I couldn't keep the images of him beneath me, completely naked, while I sucked on that sexy lower lip of his out of my mind.

"I think she misses you, Eric. I know you Vampires don't normally show any type of emotions toward one another, but from what I've seen of you two, you have a very special relationship for a maker and child. We both know she's shown plenty capable handling your duties as Sheriff, but my guess is she doesn't want to have to do all that. She actually likes being your minion. She doesn't serve you because she has to but because she wants to. I think she feels lost without you."

Eric pulled me further onto his lap and gave me a strong embrace. "How did you become so wise? Though you better never let her hear you say those things. I will try to be easier on her. She just makes me so angry with the way she disrespects you."

"She's only trying to look out for you, it's ok."

"Lover, I want to talk more about our conversation earlier. I understand what you've been saying, but please give me one last opportunity to explain myself before you give up on me. I want you, Sookie, all of you, for eternity, if you'd ever grant me that pleasure. However, right now I must go to Fangtasia and pretend to be my usual self. I would love it if you would accompany me though."

Surprisingly, going to Fangtasia and having a couple drinks sounded exactly like what I needed after the long couple of days I had. "I would love that, actually! I don't have anything to wear though." The smile on his face had me wondering if this was such a good decision, he looked like he had something up his sleeve. "Oh don't worry, Pam also purchased an entire wardrobe for you, it's in my walk-in closet in my day chamber. Come with me."

He led us into the movie center and down into his resting place. He sauntered over to the right wall and pulled open two large doors. Inside I could see several rows of his clothes. Hesitantly, I walked inside the closet to be greeted by the smell of Eric's cologne that hung on his clothing. It smelled so delicious and took me back to all the times I'd had the pleasure of inhaling his scent while we were making love all over my house. The back of the closet is where my now expansive wardrobe was hanging. At the back of it all, Eric showed me several risqué outfits in red and black leathers that were definitely Fangtasia appropriate. _'We're going to have to have a talk about him spending money on me, I'm not a kept women.'_

"I'm going to go get ready. Wear anything you like tonight, though I would like to suggest the red ensemble. It is by far my favorite color on you."

"It always has been." I gave him a real smile this time. _'Perhaps what he said earlier was right. If parts of the Eric I'm used to are coming through now, why wouldn't my Eric be at least a tiny part of the real one?'_ A small part of my heart came back to life as a seed of hope was planted deep in my soul. _'Now the real question is if that part of him is big enough to actually love me.'_

Closing the closet door behind Eric, I pulled out the red number and gave it a good look. _'Gran would have had a fit if she saw me in anything like this!'_ I passed by Eric changing in the main room, trying not to stare at his glorious butt, on my way into the bathroom. I'll never understand why Vampires loved such large and expensive bathrooms, but Eric was no exception. The floor was a gorgeous black-and-white swirled marble tile. In the back right corner, was the biggest tub I had ever seen. Actually, hot tub would be a better word for it than bath. A large two-sink vanity lined the left well and a shower to my right completed the room. After shoving myself into the red getup, I appraised myself in the full-length mirror hanging on the back of the bathroom door. The shirt was a red leather corset with strings that laced from the bottom all the way to the top of the garment. Normally that wouldn't be a big deal except there was no backing behind the lacing so you could see a slit of skin from my navel up to in-between my breasts. The bottom was the smallest micro-mini skirt I had ever seen made out of black leather. I looked good though; both pieces fit my curves in just the right way to accent them and make me look beautiful. I curled my hair and dabbed on a little makeup with the supplies Pam must have brought for me. Finally, I slid on my shoes and walked out into the bedroom.

Eric and I caught each other's gaze at the same moment and both of us froze. A quiet popping sound filled the room, clueing me into the fact his fangs had just came down. He looked drop-dead (haha!) sexy in silky black slacks, black dress shoes, and a shimmery deep red dress shirt. His hair was pulled back at the nape of his neck showing off his chiseled facial features. I wanted to take off everything he had on and screw him for the next several hours. The sound of his fangs coming out had done ridiculous things to his libido, and my imagination was running wild with all the places I'd like for him to use those fangs.

He slowly walked over to me and placed a hand on each side of my face. "Lover, you look exquisite. My only worry is that I'll have to fight every man and woman in the place off of you." His lips found mine and the kiss that followed exploded my world. I let everything go in that moment, all the worry and the excuses; the wall around my heart started to tumble down, and I kissed him with every ounce of passion I could muster. Our kissing become feverish, needing to feel each, to know the intimacy and connection we had become accustomed to the past week.

Abruptly, Eric pulled back from kissing me and took a few unnecessary breaths. "If we don't leave now, we won't be leaving this room for the next week. Ravishing you is all I want to do right now, but I must play my part as Sheriff. Once we come home though I will make you scream my name until dawn." The lust in his eyes and in his words confirmed that this was a promise he would keep. Squishing my desire for him the best I could, we walked out to the garage and got into his red corvette. Neither of us spoke the entire way to Fangtasia; we were telling each other how much we wanted each other through our bond. I couldn't feel him that well, but I knew he was feeling the full force of my lust on his end.

We arrived at Fangtasia around eleven, and the leeches were there in full force tonight. We entered through the back door and headed straight for the open floor. All eyes were immediately on us, some people were thinking we both looked good, some hated me for being with Eric, and surprisingly there were a few who were just thinking about sexual fantasies with me. Shutting out the thoughts, I reached for Eric's hand. As soon as our skin touched, it felt like sparks were flying, we looked at each other sharing another silent moment of desire. Eric sat down in his throne and asked me to sit in the new throne situated next to him. My eyebrows shot up and I stared at him questioningly. _'Does he really expect me to sit there in front of all these people?'_

"You would greatly honor me if you would take your place by my side." He motioned to the smaller throne, but I knew there was so much more behind his words, he wanted me to yield to him and fully surrender my heart. He was asking me to show everyone that I was his. _'Do I want this? Could I be a part of this life? Could I honestly handle the Vampire politics and bullshit?'_ Saying yes seemed impossible, but as I looked up to give him a "no," the words wouldn't come out. Vampire politics and danger paled in comparison to what I felt for Eric. Nothing could stop me from being by his side. I'm not sure whether Eric or I was more surprised when I glided over to the throne and took a seat.

Throughout the evening, Vampires and fangbangers both approached the throne in order to seek some of Eric's attentions. Idly, I wondered if Eric had ever taken acting classes because he was doing a standup job of convincing everyone there was nothing wrong. By the end of the evening, I was feeling a little woozy from the three gin and tonics I'd had. A strange-looking Vampire with deep-set eyes and long black hair approached us. As my eyes took in this intimidating creature little red flags started popping up all over in my head. This guy looked scary as hell with his dark features and dangerous glint in his eyes. While most Vampires appeared slightly human, there was nothing human left about this creature. He looked like evil embodied in immortal form. Tingles crept down my spine. Eric stayed as calm as ever.

"Andre, what brings you here tonight?"


	6. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "You have something that the Queen wants, Northman."

"You have something that the Queen wants, Northman."

A sigh escaped Eric's lips as he pretended to look annoyed. "And what might that be?"

"This human here has been selected to serve in the Queens retinue. Compton was sent here to procure her but has failed. Now I have come to collect her, which is how it should have been in the first place." He flashed me a fangy grin. My brain wasn't sure which piece of awful information to process first. My heart was breaking at the realization of Bill's betrayal. My first love never really loved me, how could he do something so heartless _? 'Vampire.'_ The part of my heart that still cared for Bill broke off and seemed to splinter digging into the rest of my body. Tears began to cloud my vision and my mind kept asking why. Why me? Why couldn't I just be happy? Realizing I didn't really have the time to dwell on my ex's betrayal I looked at Eric and used my love for him to gather my wits about myself. I decided to make like Scarlett and think about Bill tomorrow. My next concern was how we were going to get out of this situation, I knew going with Andre wouldn't let me live for very long. I shuddered at the thoughts of what this menacing Vampire would do with me. While Eric was older, his position was below the Queen. Would he dare defy her for me?

"I was unaware of these plans. If I had known, I never would have interfered, but she is mine now, and I'm rather fond of this girl."

Anger burned in Andre's eyes like a wildfire out of control. "You dare go against the Queen? We don't care for your insignificant emotions toward a human girl. The Queen wants her, and she shall have her!"

I could tell this conversation was on dangerous ground being that Eric probably had very little idea of what was going on. I guessed the only reason he even knew the Vampire's name was because Pam had briefed him on the royal entourage or something. Like our own knight in shining armor, Pam strode over to where we were standing.

"Hello again Andre." She purred at him. "My master and this women are blood bonded. The question here is whether the Queen dares defy our sacred laws by taking a bonded from their Vampire."

Surprise fueled the fire burning in Andre's eyes as he looked from me to Eric and back again. "You have completed a blood bond? Sophie-Anne will not be happy about this Northman. "

"Once again, if I had been informed, I never would have stood in her way. Give my apologies and best wishes to Sophie-Anne."

"This is far from over, Viking. I'm sure she will want to see you and witness a blood exchange. As well as perform a couple, tests, to confirm the truth of the matter." His eyes lit up and his lips turned into a sardonic smile when he uttered the word "tests." I shuddered, trying not to imagine the details of what said tests would include.

"We would be more than delighted to visit with the Queen. Notify Pam of the time and place and we will come."

' _As if we have a choice.'_ Without another word Andre left the bar, leaving Eric and I wondering what the hell had just happened. The dread showing on Pam's face did nothing to help ease the huge knot that was rising in the pit of my stomach. I didn't know what being bonded meant, and I wasn't sure I was going to like it. What had she gotten us into? _'Just keep in mind, anything is better than having to go with that monster.'_

We all shuffled into Eric's office, closing the door behind us. "Let's go down below, I don't want to chance anyone hearing us." Pam opened a concealed door in the corner of the room that revealed a descending staircase. Both Vampires started down the stairs, leaving me at the top. Now, I'm not really afraid of the dark, but I didn't want to break my neck!

"Hey, guys, human—remember?" Eric's laugh filled the stairwell and my heart. The lights flipped on, and I climbed down the steps with a new resolve in my heart. No matter what this was, Eric and I could do this together.

Upon reaching the bottom of the stairs, my eyes grew wide with what I saw. This room wasn't generally used for pow-wows; it looked like a sex prison. Everything was clad in black, giving off an eerie sexual vibe. Pam and Eric were sitting on the bed, so I reluctantly went and sat down next to them. With all my might, I tried to not think about how many women had been in this room with the regular Eric.

"Explain what a blood bond is Pam, and why did it get Sookie out of having to go with Andre?"

Pam took a deep breath, obviously trying to steel herself for our reactions. "A blood bond occurs when a Vampire and human mutually exchange blood three times. It is a very rare occurrence, especially for one as old as you. A bonded couple can feel all the emotions of the other, and the bond can never be undone. They are very close and must never be separated, or it would cause deep pain to both the Vampire and human. If one of them should ever die, the other usually follows soon after, driven mad by the grief. This is why most Vampires don't bond; it's a very big weakness to have something that could affect you so strongly. That's also why it's law for no one to ever separate a Vampire and their bonded. However, most Vampires that have formed a bond said that they experienced happiness they had not known since their human life."

"How could you tell them we had done that?" I shrieked at her. "Now the Queen is expecting for us to be that way, to prove it, even! That wasn't fair to either Eric or me!" Eric's cold hand took my warm one and started rubbing circles in my palm.

"No, lover, she did the right thing. Andre would have taken you otherwise. I would gladly bond myself to you. Have I not already told you I would give up all of this for you? If you would rather not be my bonded, then I will resign my position as Sheriff, and we will run away together. But you could not keep the life you have here. It is your choice."

Tears welled up as I realized how much Eric was willing to sacrifice for my safety. I'd already made my mind up only hours ago that I was going to accept my place by his side no matter what that meant. "I would be honored to be your bonded Eric. But, not until after you have your memories back. I know you're confident you will still feel the same way, and I trust you now, but I can't do something so intimate with you until it's completely real."

"Yes Eric, listen to her please. It may be your only solution to save her, but please don't rush into this decision."

Laughter filled the room. "My two ladies crooning over me, such foolishness. We will wait until this issue with the witch is taken care of, then Sookie and I will complete the bonding. Stop fussing you two! Pam, can you close the bar for the evening? I would like to take my almost-bonded home."

Butterflies filled my stomach. 'Home? Eric's house is home now? If we were bonded, was that practically like being his wife?' Strangely, I really liked the sound of those possibilities. Pam left and we were sitting alone on a huge bed. All the passion and lust from earlier in the night came rushing to the forefront of my mind full-force. Deciding to try out my new-found gifts I smirked at him and closed my eyes.

"I bet I can beat you home. You better hurry 'cause I'm going to be naked in our bed waiting to be pillaged by my Viking!" I envisioned his day room in my head with as much clarity I could muster. I took all my pent up desire from the night and shoved it into my wish to be there in that room to find some relief. A sweet breeze blew across my face, and when I opened my eyes, I had obtained my objective. Relief swelled in me as not going anywhere would have been pretty embarrassing. I should know better than to play cat and mouse with a Vampire, but I just couldn't help myself. I ran to the bathroom and checked my hair and makeup making sure everything was still perfect. Wiggling out of my clothes proved to be a difficult task with the sweat that had built up between my skin and the leather. Finally free of all my clothes, I ran and jumped on the bed and got under the sheets. I assumed my Viking would be home any minute; I doubted he could deal with the speed restraints of his car when I had challenged him like that.

There was a rustle at the top of the stairs alerting me to his return. The door flung open illuminating my Vampire as he stalked toward me. "Mmmm, here just as promised. You better be bare under those sheets."

A twinkle shone in my eyes as I answered him. "Of course I am, now what are you going to do about it?" His clothes went flying into the corner as he hovered over me. Antagonizing slowly he pulled the blankets down and studied every inch of my skin.

"It's been to long since I've had you lover. I'll make your body sing for me." Goosebumps raised over my sun-kissed flesh as he started to gently caress me with his hands. I grabbed his face and pulled him up to look me in the eyes.

"I love you, Eric Northman. I'm sorry it's taken me so long to fully admit it, but I do love you. I promise to stand by you as your bonded, even through all the Vampire bullshit and politics. Fear means nothing when you're by my side."

"I love you too, dear one, I will until my final death. I'm looking forward to being bonded with you, Sookie Stackhouse; you make me so happy and proud."

Though his lips were cold as ice, he set my skin afire as he dropped kisses on my neck and stomach. One breast was enveloped by his capable hand while Eric's perfect mouth sucked, bit, and lathed the other. It had been to long since we'd been together, and I felt a pressure already building deep inside me. My eyelids fluttered down as he replaced his hand with his mouth on my other breast and his fingers found my very sensitive nub.

"Oh Eric, that feels so good." His lips turned up into a smile against my skin, but he didn't relent his worship of my breasts. Writhing in pleasure I begged him to give me more—anything more.

"Only if you watch me while I make you scream my name." My eyes flew open and locked onto his. Too slowly he kissed his way down to my center and gently licked from my sex all the way up to my clit. I shivered at the sensations and insane pleasure this man was already bringing me.

"Ohh god, Eric, you are so amazing." Teasing me, he continued to barely caress me with his tongue. The pressure in my stomach was building to something I had never experienced before; all I could think of was that I wanted more of him—all of him. I wanted to be consumed by this man and never let go. Finally, he plunged his tongue deep inside me while tweaking my nub in-between his fingers. Sparks ran through my entire body at his touch, the contact felt blissful after him holding out for so long; I thought I was going to cum just from that.

"Eric, oh, Eric. Don't stop!" He sucked my clit between his lips, earning a deep moan from me. "Eric, please . . ." He stopped to look deep in my lust-riddled eyes. "What, Sookie, tell me what you want."

"Bite me, Eric. Please bite me!" He kissed my nub one last time before sinking his fangs into my thigh. With all my might I tried to keep my eyes open but I couldn't for very long. Tidal waves of pure ecstasy and joy flowed over and through me. " _Eric_!" He was back at my center savoring the juices that poured out for him.

"I told you I would make you scream my name. I believe this is where we were interrupted last time, I have no intentions of letting that happen again." Moving up the bed he positioned himself over me. His gracious plenty was poking into my stomach, reminding me of the pleasure I was about to experience. Instead of entering me though he only rubbed the tip of himself up and down my very slick folds. The sensation pushed me to the brink and I thought I would go mad if I didn't finally have all of him.

"Eric, stop teasing me, please . . . _please_ , I want you." My words were all the encouragement he needed, he slowly pushed himself inside of me, making sure I was ready for him. Frankly, I knew that my body was more than ready for what he had to offer, so I thrust my hips up taking him further.

"Anxious are we, lover?" I grunted my response and grabbed his perfect butt to pull him closer to me. From then on, his thrusts were deep and hard. I did my best to keep up with him, wanting to give as much pleasure as I took. "Sookie, my goddess." The golden edge was getting closer and closer. I dug my nails into his back and hung on with all I had while the extreme bliss took me into its swells. Eric was close behind me and let out a low howl as he released himself deep inside me. He collapsed down on the bed and pulled me into his side. We sat enthralled in each other's love for sometime before he finally broke the silence.

"I may not remember everything, but I somehow know I have never had another like you. I think we were made for each other, lover." His words brought back what Hekate had said about us.

"Hekate thought so. She said that it was very odd for someone with Fae blood to be so drawn to a Vampire. She thinks we're fated; whatever that means."

"Fated? I like the sound of that. Let me show you just how much." He winked and gave me his trademark smirk. We showed each other our love and passion in many different ways and positions until dawn forced Eric to rest.

Before he died for the day, he whispered in my ear. "Forever Sookie. I will love you like this forever."


	7. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That morning I dreamed of being chained to the post of Andre's bed. Exhaustion and hunger clung to every part of me making me a shadow of the strong person I once was. My eyes were sunk in and bloodshot, my lips were cracked and bleeding with every movement, my skin was dry and practically flaking, my hair was dirty and matted; in short, I looked dead. Lazily I gazed over the room that had become my prison, the walls were all black with red sponged over them; to resemble spattered blood I assumed. Pictures of battle scenes covered the walls, most of them including Andre. The smell of rotting flesh and dried blood hung thick in the air and invaded my nostrils. His bed looked like it was made out of gold with black silk sheets covering the mattress. Heavy iron chains like the ones around my wrists and ankles were attached to every post of the bed. In the corner was his torture cabinet that housed whips, clamps, knives, rope, and so many other things; many of which I'd experiences first hand. Everything about this room screamed rage and begged for death. I moved to try and ease some of the stiffness in my bones only to scrape off the scab on my knee and send a fresh wave of pain coursing through my body. Blood oozed out the wound that was one of many. My body was covered in bruises and there were several places skin was missing as a result of Andre tearing it off with his fangs. My ankle, fingers, cheekbone, and a few ribs were probably broken, but the only proof I had was the mind-numbing pain I felt anytime I moved.

That morning I dreamed of being chained to the post of Andre's bed. Exhaustion and hunger clung to every part of me making me a shadow of the strong person I once was. My eyes were sunk in and bloodshot, my lips were cracked and bleeding with every movement, my skin was dry and practically flaking, my hair was dirty and matted; in short, I looked dead. Lazily I gazed over the room that had become my prison, the walls were all black with red sponged over them; to resemble spattered blood I assumed. Pictures of battle scenes covered the walls, most of them including Andre. The smell of rotting flesh and dried blood hung thick in the air and invaded my nostrils. His bed looked like it was made out of gold with black silk sheets covering the mattress. Heavy iron chains like the ones around my wrists and ankles were attached to every post of the bed. In the corner was his torture cabinet that housed whips, clamps, knives, rope, and so many other things; many of which I'd experiences first hand. Everything about this room screamed rage and begged for death. I moved to try and ease some of the stiffness in my bones only to scrape off the scab on my knee and send a fresh wave of pain coursing through my body. Blood oozed out the wound that was one of many. My body was covered in bruises and there were several places skin was missing as a result of Andre tearing it off with his fangs. My ankle, fingers, cheekbone, and a few ribs were probably broken, but the only proof I had was the mind-numbing pain I felt anytime I moved.

Andre walked in and knelt in front of me. Time meant nothing to me anymore, but I had been here long enough to not scream and cower at the sight of him. I'd learned that only enraged him further and made the beatings worse.

"Are you ready to submit yet? All you have to do is take my blood and you will no longer be in pain. You can stop this foolishness today."

Raising my head I met his evil black eyes with a stare of death, "Why don't you just force it down my throat? I'd rather die than willingly take your blood." Andre's laughter filled the room further choking out what little light or hope there was to be found. His laughter sounded like it was delivered straight from the throat of hell.

"But that just wouldn't be as fun! I want you to want my blood so bad that you ravage me for it. There's nothing like breaking the spirit of a strong-willed human. You will bow to me eventually!"

I tried spitting at him but my throat was to dry. "Never, Andre." In all honestly he had broke me a long time ago. Well, he had broken my will to live, but there was nothing he could do to make me take his blood and bond myself to him.

He tilted his head to the side and curled his lips up into a devilish grin. "You wouldn't believe how many times I've heard that before. Just like everyone before you, you will succumb to the pain." He started to leave the room but stopped at the doorway and looked over his shoulder at me. "Oh _yes_ , I do love this little game." He winked at me, which would have made me throw up if there were anything in my stomach. Taking his leave, he slammed the door shut behind him.

With the slam of the door, I sat straight up in bed. Terror coursed through my body like an electrical current as my brain scrambled to remember where I was. ' _I'm_ _in Eric's day chamber. I'm safe.'_ Sweat covered every part of my body making me feel sticky and gross. I took several deep breaths to calm myself before trying to make my way to the bathroom. _'Eric loves you remember. Andre will never get a hold of you.'_ Oh but what if he did. My dream felt so real! I could feel the numbness that had engulfed me, my hope for death rather than life. Tremors shook my body as it occurred to me what life with Andre would really be like.

"Sookie."

I yelped and jumped three feet off the bed at someone calling my name.

"Sookie."

Eric? But he was in his daytime rest; there was no way he could be speaking. I curled up next to him and whispered in his ear, "Eric? Was that you?"

"Mmm, you ok? Felt you. Scared." He managed to grunt out. _'Since when can Vampires talk in their sleep?'_

"Yeah I'm okay, baby. Just a bad dream, go back to sleep." Apparently I didn't have to tell him twice because he went back to sleeping like the dead. Knowing my Vampire was able to sense me during the day and was concerned enough to wake up and ask about my safety put my mind at ease. I gathered my courage around me and ran into the bathroom slamming the door behind me and locking it. _'Oh come on Sookie, get yourself together! Andre is a vampire too and won't be awake for a couple hours. You're so stupid sometimes!'_ I took one more reassuring breath and tried to shake the dream from my now troubled mind. Moving very slowly and cautiously, I turned on the shower as hot as I thought I could stand. The shower greatly helped to relax me and I let the worries and cares of the past couple of days wash down the drain with the water cascading off my body.

After my shower, I got dressed in a simple cotton aqua sundress. I blow dried my hair and put on a little makeup. Not having anything to do until Eric rose for the day, I decided to explore his house more since I never really got to see all of it. As quietly as possible, I punched the code into the first keypad and ascended the many stairs. Making my way out into the movie room, I suddenly felt very self-conscious. _'Is Eric going to care if I go snooping through his house?'_

"Our house" my inner voice tried to whisper at me. I stomped on that inner voice, trying to beat it into submission. _'It's not our house yet. But just in case we do stay together after all this I better be prepared.'_ After rationalizing away my fears of being a snoop, I took off to the other side of the house. I still hadn't been down the other hallway on the main floor or the back hallway that led off the back of the balcony. Deciding that the balcony looked a little too ominous, I chose to start down the first floor hallway. The hallway had several doors lining its wall. Behind door number one was a super nice work out room with weights, treadmills, ellipticals, and all sorts of other stuff. _'Why would a Vampire need a workout room, it's not like they need it!'_

I closed that door and moved on to the next which revealed a large aerobics room complete with mirrors and a nice wood floor. Along the back wall hung several humongous swords that shone bright with sunrays bouncing of them. _'I guess even a Viking vampire has to keep his skills up! I wonder if he would ever train me to use one of those things.'_ My mind envisioned us both on the wooden floor, dancing around each other elegantly in a seemingly unending dance of swordplay. He would, of course win, but I bet he'd let me try for a while. The next thing I knew, my imagination kicked me out of the picture, and my Viking was practicing with his sword alone and without a shirt. His hair was gently flying to and fro with every step he took, his face was drawn in concentration, and that damn lower lip was sticking out just a bit. Before I could stop myself, I started thinking about Eric coming toward me. He dropped the sword and looked my in the eye.

"Lover, do you enjoy watching me with my sword?"

I would, of course, respond with a yes.

"I've used this sword to bend many to my will. I think today I'll use another sword to bend you to my desires." He would of course waggle his eyebrows at me and smirk, making me unsure if I should slap or fuck the smirk right off his face. Next he would pull me into his embrace and bend me backward barely touching his lips to mine, making me want to beg for the kiss. As if to torture me, he would lazily trace the shape of my lips with his tongue. Oh, how that man can undo me with just the hint of a kiss! Finally, he would gently delve into my mouth with his tongue silently asking for me to yield. I would grant him access, groaning at his family taste. Not being able to stand it anymore, I entangled my hands in his hair and pulled him close to me kissing him for all the I was worth. He returned my desires with an enflamed zest, our tongues dueling for dominance. I was panting hard from my imaginary make out scene and had to grab onto the wall to keep from falling over. _'Sheesh! This increased libido thing is a bit ridiculous.'_

After taking a few deep breaths and steadying myself, I left the room before I could get carried away again and wandered further down the hall. I noticed it didn't fell much like a home; it lacked the personal touches of a real home such as pictures and knick-knacks on the wall. I stopped at the next door feeling excitement bubble up in me. Exploring Eric's house was turning out to be like a treasure hunt with new discoveries around every corner. I flung open the next door to find a luxurious laundry room complete with a state of the art washer and dryer and two large shelves. One shelf housed several sets of linens; the other shelf looked like it had everything you could need from shaving cream to shampoo. Boring! I closed the door and moved on to the next area of interest. Behind the last door in this hallway was a small office that looked like it had never been touched. There was a small desk with a laptop sitting on top of it and bookshelves lining the walls. I couldn't feel Eric's in this room, and I doubted this was his personal study. Everything was nice but slightly generic. I walked over to the books and read the titles. Surprisingly, I recognized the majority of the books; it would seem most of them were written within the last decade.

Leaving the room the hallway opened up into another sitting room. This one was much brighter and more inviting than the one off the entryway. There was a bar sitting in the corner of the room, and a small TV was positioned on top of a cabinet on the other side. I walked through the room and down the hallway that led off to the right. There were more doors down this hallway. I opened the first one to find a beautiful bedroom that was done in warm earth tone colors. There was a large king-size bed, a door that I'm assuming led to a large closet, a vanity, and a dresser all situated in the room. I walked in to explore further and found there was also an attached bathroom that was very luxurious; almost as nice as the one in Eric's dayroom. All of the next doors led to bedrooms fashioned just the same as the first one I saw except in different colors. I had never seen so many beautiful guest bedrooms in one house. I wasn't sure why he had them, since I don't think he ever had any guests; I guess he just wanted to be prepared. _'Always be prepared. That does seem to be Eric's motto._ ' I pictured Eric wearing a boy scouts uniform and giving their little salute thing and busted up laughing. He would just love hearing me compare his vampire prowess to a human child's slogan. At that, I laughed even harder picturing the look he would have on is his face. If Pam could ever get over her new dislike for me, I was going to have to share my boy scouts revelation with her; she was always looking for new ammunition to tease Eric with.

Leaving that room and continuing down the hallway, I found myself in the kitchen and dining area. _'Hmmm, only one part of the house left then.'_ Trying to convince myself there was no danger I walked back to the entryway and up the stairs. Opening the heavy doors at the back of the balcony, I saw a long hallway with many sets of doors on either side with one large door at the end. I took a deep breath and went to the first door. It turned out to be another study, and I knew this one was Eric's; it smelled strongly of his familiar musky scent. Papers were all over his desk that looked exactly like the one he had at Fangtasia. There was a very nice laptop computer on top of the desk that was still open. Curiosity got the best of me so I went to see if there was anything up on the computer. _'Darn, password protected._ ' The books on these shelves were brittle looking and appeared very old. Something about this room brought me comfort, maybe because I knew Eric spent a lot of time here and I could almost feel him. I sat down in his huge computer chair and just took a second to relax. There was so much to see in his house; I was starting to feel like I was never going to reach the end!

The room across the hall seemed to be calling to me though, so I went and opened the door. I gasped when I saw what lay behind it. Before me, was a huge library with a revolving ladder and everything. My heart swelled with excitement looking at all the reading possibilities this room held. Considering I wasn't able to get a good education with my disability getting in the way all the time, I had to rely on reading as many books as possible to educate myself. The potential to learn new things seemed limitless in the library. I knew if I got to stay, it would be my favorite room; besides the bedroom of course! The last room for me to explore waited at the end of the hall. Surprisingly, it was a master bedroom that looked almost exactly like Eric's day chamber. _'Guess he has to make it look like he sleeps somewhere other than his dayroom'_

Having my fill of being an adventurer for the day, I went down to the movie room to relax until Eric got up. The clock on the wall told me the time was 4:00; only a few more hours until I could be with my vampire again. Sitting down on the couch I relaxed into the pillows.

' _Child, I am ready. Bring your Vampire and come to me soon after dark.'_

Hekate's voice was familiar but still took me off guard since I thought I was alone. I was getting pretty frustrated with myself for being so jumpy.

' _Okay we will be there. Thank you in advance for your help.'_ I sent back to her.

' _Of course, dear.'_

' _Would it be alright if Pam, Eric's child, came along with us? Her input has been helpful the past couple of days and she will be part of the search team.'_

' _Yes, she is welcome here if you trust her.'_

' _Okay, see you soon!'_

My nerves starting building, and I could feel my stomach clenching. Tonight would put into motion the events that would determine my future. If Eric really did forget about me after he got his memories back, then my dream from earlier would likely come true. I took the next hour to think about and absorb all that had happened to me in the last couple of weeks. My libido started hopping around when I replayed all the images of sex with Eric—the shower that changed everything between us. Mainly, I thought heavily of last night and my dream about Andre. My heart tugged in pain as I remembered his words about Bill.

' _Did he even care about me at all? Oh God, I gave him everything; even my virginity, and he didn't even care!'_ I was happy with Eric, but Bill was my first love and my heart broke thinking about his betrayal. I didn't have time to dwell on it last night, so here in private, I let the awfulness of it wash over me. I'm privy to every person's deepest darkest secrets, so I know there's evil out there, but I just couldn't believe someone could be that cruel—that heartless! Tears slipped down my cheeks as I mourned for my first love and the innocence he stole from me. If I were single, I'd say I needed to be more careful and not get involved so fast with someone I barely knew, but it was a little late for that. Here I was, loving a man that was definitely not entirely himself at the moment _. 'If this doesn't turn out well, I really have no one but myself to blame.'_ I sighed deeply; the events from the past couple of days were really starting to drain me. I was ready to know if I was going to live out my life reveling in the love of my Vampire or being chained to a monster. Putting off my worries for the moment I let the peacefulness and emptiness of sleep pull me under. This time I dreamed of having my vampire all to myself loving me from sunset to sunrise.


	8. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Sookie. Wake up, lover. I want to spend some time with you before we go to Fangtasia tonight."

"Sookie. Wake up, lover. I want to spend some time with you before we go to Fangtasia tonight."

My eyelids fluttered open to see a face so angelic my dreams couldn't do better smiling over me. Desire and warmth filled his eyes as he gently caressed my face. I tried wiping the sleep from my eyes as I sat up on the couch.

"I'm not going to Fangtasia tonight." Eric was kneeling before me in an instant.

"Lover, please come with me. All of this is still so new to me, and I don't feel calm without you by my side. Ever since you found me on the road I've felt lost without you." One look in his eyes, and I was struck with how calm he's been pretending to be the past couple of days for my, Pam, and Area 5's sake. Deep down, he really was still like a scared child who didn't know what to do next or who to trust. My heart broke for him and his continued turmoil over not knowing who he was.

"No, baby, we're not going to Fangtasia tonight. Hekate called me," I paused to tap my temple so he knew what I meat by called. "She said she's done with everything ,and we're supposed to go meet her tonight. Call Pam and let her know." My heart thrummed with the anticipation of finding Mark and what it could mean. Eric's body tensed up and his eyes became clouded with thought.

"Oh. Well, that is good news. Don't be frightened, everything will be fine after I have my memories back. We will bond out of love, and Andre will never be able to touch you." He gave me a chaste kiss on the lips before calling Pam and telling us to meet her at Hekate's shop in an hour."

' _We'll be there in an hour Hekate.'_

' _Good. Don't be so worried child, you and the Vampire are fated for a reason. All will be as it should.'_

Her words did little to calm me; I couldn't get rid of the awful feeling that everything was going to go wrong tonight. Being chained to Andre's bed kept replaying over and over again in my mind. Fear started climbing its way to the surface, and it was getting harder to stomp it back down again. Even if Eric and I bonded I knew that dream would torture me for the rest of my life or until Andre met his final death.

Eric drifted back into the room and took me into his arms. I let his love and comfort wash over me and tried to regain my composure. "Why are you so afraid? For that matter, what had you so terrified earlier today while I was at rest? I thought you were being attacked."

"It was a bad dream. Andre had me chained to his bed. I had been badly beaten and nearly drained. He was trying to get me to willingly take his blood, he was—" the rest of the words wouldn't come out as tears brimmed behind my eyes and overflowed.

"Sh, dear one, that will never happen. I have you." A few more sniffles from me and hugs from Eric, and I finally pulled myself back together. Deciding Stackhouse women don't take things sitting down I put my worries of Andre to the side and prepared myself for catching Mark.

"We need to go, Eric, so we make it there in time."

"Yes, are you ready?"

What a loaded question! Of course I wasn't ready to face what may lie ahead, but I told him yes anyways.

The ride to Hekate's was full of silence. Excitement burst from every pore of Eric's body. Pam and I weren't the only ones to ready to have him back to his usual self, and I could understand why; I'm sure not having your memories is very disconcerting. I used the drive to give myself an inner pep talk.

' _Everything is going to be ok. You're going to find Mark and get the spell reversed. Eric may be a little shocked at first, but he loves you and that isn't going to change just because he's Sheriff Eric again. Believe in the trust you have for him. Believe what Hekate said about us being fated. And if things don't work out, I can just use my new found 'gifts' to stay away from Andre. Yes, I can do this. I can do this!'_

The same magical feeling covered me like a blanket when we pulled into the shopping mall parking lot. Pam greeted us with a nod, and we proceeded inside.

I smiled when I walked in and saw the stools already sat in front of the counter with Hekate seated behind it waiting for us to join her.

"It's good to see you again, Fae child. I have done all the things you've asked of me. Currently, Mark is camping in an abandoned building here in Shreveport. He will likely try to evade you again, so I've made this charm for you to wear." She pulled a necklace from one of the counter drawers and placed it in my hand. "As long as you wear this, it will draw on your natural Fae powers and help you locate the person you desire to find."

"Thank you so much for your help. We're worried about him casting another spell, so Pam had the great idea of us using our telepathy to get the spell that was used on Eric out of him. Would you be willing to help with that?"

Hekate gave her wrinkly grin to Pam. "Very smart idea, Vampire. Yes, I can help you with getting the information you need. Bring him to me as soon as you catch him, and we will undo this curse that's on your Viking."

Pam looked pleased. I was still sullen, and Eric looked downright jubilant at the news. I put the necklace on and thought hard about finding Mark. An invisible tug pulled me northward. Surprise overtook me; we were already close to the place he was staying.

"He's close by here. Only a couple blocks northeast." I whispered.

"Well then, I hate to not stay and chit chat, but let's catch this fleabag so I can have my Master back." Pam walked out the door with the click clack of her high heels saying goodbye.

"We'll be back soon." Eric grabbed my hand and led me out to the corvette. Pam followed as we drove within a couple blocks of the abandoned building Mark was stationed in. He turned to look at me with excitement in his eyes. This Eric still loved a good chase and a possible fight.

"You stay in the car, and we'll go get Mark."

"What if he gets away again?" Eric laughed and gave me a look that screamed "yeah right."

"With both Pam and I concentrating on him, there is no possibility for escape."

Something didn't feel right about Hekate giving me this charm if there wasn't going to be any reason to use it. Eric was right, there was no reason Mark would get away from two focused vampires. Why did I get the feeling she had slipped me a very valuable gift without giving me room to protest?

"Hurry back, and be careful." He flashed me a perfect pearly white smile and gave me a deep kiss before meeting Pam on the sidewalk and taking off in vampire speed. My insides clutched the entire time they were gone. I knew they could handle themselves, but if there was anything I'd learned in the past year was that you should always expect the unexpected After fifteen minutes, I was starting to get antsy and was about to go chase after them myself. Before I could act on that thought though, Eric was standing outside the car with blood on his chin and bloodlust in his eyes. He had an unconscious Mark in his arms; his jaw looked broken, and there were several fang marks on his neck.

Part of me wanted to sympathize with him in his obvious agony, but a much bigger part of me jumped for joy knowing this evil creature was finally caught and was going to get what he deserved. With the gentleness of a grizzly bear, they threw Mark onto the towel-covered floor of Pam's van. Being around vampires long enough, I knew Eric was probably in a heavy state of bloodlust from the excitement of the hunt and feeding from Mark. Luckily, I also knew that, so far in my life, Eric had never hurt me, even in extreme fighting situations where he gave himself over to his primal side. He lowered himself into the car and looked at me with eyes full of hunger, begging me for relief. Softly, I moved my hand to his and beckoned him to take what was his. Without knowing what happened, I was sitting on Eric's lap, and he was fiercely kissing me. His hands roamed and felt like they were everywhere at once, starting a fire deep inside me. Not being able to control myself, I kissed him back with all the passion I could muster. I slipped my hand down to his pants and unzipped them; setting his very ready gracious plenty free. I quickly stroked him up and down while our tongues fought for control.

"Ugh, Sookie." He moaned when I started to pump him harder. A smile tugged at my mouth; it was wonderful knowing I could elicit the same strong reactions from my Vampire as he could from me. My libido was bouncing up and down, screaming for some relief of my own. Daydreaming in the sword room earlier had made me horny and this situation was only making it worse. Later on, I used that extreme horniness as an excuse for my blatantly inappropriate behavior. Sensing my strong need for him, Eric slipped his hand up my aqua dress, moved my barely-there black lace thong aside, and started gingerly petting me. As he ran his long fingers across my slick folds and swirled around my nub, my head clouded with lust for this amazing man—my man—so I didn't even think twice when he lifted me up and slowly guided himself inside of me.

"Mine, all mine!"

There wasn't much room in the corvette, but Eric still managed to continuously pick me up and slam me back down on his cock. Every thrust in was taking me closer and closer to the edge of a cliff I so desperately wanted to jump off of. In this position, he was hitting that sweet spot deep inside me over and over again.

"Oh, don't stop! Harder. Faster. Oh, God, please don't stop!"

My Vampire didn't disappoint and did just as I asked. He drove into me at a furious pace, bending every previous conception I had of what pure pleasure really was. I needed to feel that release so badly, so I did what I knew would push him over the edge; I leaned forward and whispered in his ear.

"Eric, you feel so good inside me. Only you can do this to me. I want you to fuck me like this forever; I'm yours. I want to come for you. Bite me, Eric."

His length grew even harder while I spoke to him. Without stopping his mind-bending pace, he pulled back and looked at me. I saw the most raw hunger looking at me from behind Eric's crystalline blue eyes. He wanted me with a passion unmatched by any man I had ever met. I tilted my head to the side, giving him easy access to what we both wanted. Immediately, Eric sunk his fangs into my neck, sending us both over that glorious cliff we had been running toward. He poured his seed deep inside me as my walls clenched him tightly, milking him for all he had.

Goosebumps made their appearance over my skin as he continued to lick my neck, sufficiently healing his fang marks. Spent from out little quickie I collapsed against him, taking in his familiar scent and letting my love overflow into the bond while aftershocks of my orgasm still tore through me.

"Wow. Just wow!" was all I could breathlessly mutter after a few minutes.

"Yes, that was quite enjoyable, lover. However, I'm sure Pam is waiting for us at Hekate's, and she doesn't seem like a patient one."

It was only then that I realized exactly what we had just done. My head popped up and I took in our surroundings, praying that no one had walked by and saw our little sexscapde.

"Oh my God, Eric, we did not just have sex in your car in the middle of Shreveport!" My hands flew up to cover my face that was turning a bright shade of tomato red. Eric burst into laughter at my sudden shame and gave me a kiss that had me feeling light headed.

"That's not what you were thinking a few minutes ago. I think you were enjoying having my cock deep inside you, and if you admit it to yourself, the possibility of being caught only made it better," he whispered in my ear. If the tomato red shade wasn't enough his words hiked the color up to something more of a fire-engine red, mainly because I knew his words were true. Hey, after being a virgin for so long, it was nice to experiment a little bit, and who better to do that with than a Viking sex god?

Tenderly, Eric lifted me off his lap, put my panties back in their place, and returned me to my seat. He tucked Mr. Gracious Plenty back into his pants before barreling down the street towards Hekate's. I tried not to think about what we had just done, but I couldn't help it. And to make matters worse, it was actually turning me on again; even though we were about to face Mark, all I could think about was sex with my Vampire.

' _Sheesh, I'm starting to act like Sheriff Eric!'_

Only a few moments later, we were back in the shopping center parking lot. Upon actually getting to our destination, thoughts of sex did leave my mind, and that uncontrollably despairing feeling started creeping back up in my heart. Before we got to the door, I stopped and turned to Eric.

"Listen, just in case this is my last chance to tell you, I love you, Eric Northman. I want to be your bonded, and I really hope everything goes well in there. I'll . . . I'll miss you terribly if you decide you don't want me."

In all honestly, I would be more heartbroken than I'd ever been if he decided he didn't want me after he got his memories back, but I didn't want to make him feel bad if that was his decision.

Eric closed the gap between us and put one arm around me while the other hand cupped my face. "I will always want you, dear one. Trust me and don't fear." He quickly kissed my lips and led us inside.

Mark was strapped to a chair in the middle of the room with Pam and Hekate sitting on the stools in front of the counter.

"Really, you two, couldn't sex have waited for later? We do have more important things to do." Pam motioned to Mark as she spoke. Realizing that she could smell my still heightened arousal and Eric's juices pooled between my legs made me want to hide in a corner and die.

"I uh, we didn't . . . I mean . . . it was Eric's fault." He smirked at Pam obviously proud of what we had done rather than ashamed. _'Vampire sexuality, I just don't get it but I sure do enjoy it!'_

' _It's how they are child, they have lived so long that restraints we put on ourselves don't matter to them any longer.'_

I gulped and turned red again remembering I wasn't the only telepath in the room. I was desperately hoping that I either hadn't broadcast or Hekate had blocked out the replaying of Eric's and my little tryst. The knowing grin on her face told me she had seen it crystal clear. Before I could be embarrassed any further, I suggested we get on with what we came here for.

Hekate and I both placed our hands on Mark.

"What spell did Hallow use on Eric?" I asked him.

His mind was nothing but a dull hum, and every time I tried to enter, I felt like I was running into a brick wall. I looked at Hekate questioningly.

"He's blocking us. Hallow must have trained him how; I didn't expect them to be prepared to battle telepaths. Try harder." I closed my eyes and tried with all my might to reach into his mind, but to no avail.

"I don't understand. I was able to read him before, I was even able to force him to do stuff when he was attacking me. Why isn't it working now?"

Hekate's brow creased in thought as she formulated a reply. "When you simply read his mind he probably wasn't trying to block. The other times I would guess you were using your Fae powers, not just your telepathy."

Touching him again, I searched deep inside myself until I found that small hum I knew was the source of my newfound gifts. I summoned the energy and looked Mark deep in the eyes. He must have seen the difference in me because he started trembling under my touch. I thrust my mind into his, willing him to take down his walls. Slowly, I could feel the barriers lower themselves until they were nonexistent.

"Now, you will show us what spell your sister put on him."

His rage at being forced to tell his guarded secret was evident in his body language. If he could tear us apart at that moment, I'm sure he would have. I pulled out of the trance and nodded to a wide-eyed Hekate to try again. We both touched him and immediately saw everything that happened with Hallow and the spell.

"Will you be able to fix this now?"

"Yes, it was not a very complex spell. I have everything I need here at the shop. If you would like, I will prepare everything in the back room and we can begin the removal process shortly."

Pam and Eric eagerly nodded their heads. "We will go dispose of this rat in the meantime. We'll be back in half an hour." Pam looked at Mark with a dismayed expression. "That's really not enough time to have fun, but we'll make do." Trying not to think about the torture Mark was going to endure, I gave Eric a hug and nodded goodbye to Pam. They picked Mark up and left the shop.

I plopped down on a stool and took a deep, steadying breath. Hekate was rushing around grabbing something odd from one shelf and the next. While passing by me to the back room, she stopped and took in my sullen features.

"I thought I told you not to worry? Hardly anything can stand in the way of a fated couple. After seeing your gifts today, I know you are something very special and the gods surely have something planned for you. I'm betting it involves that Vampire of yours too, just wait and see!" She gave me a reassuring pat on the back before continuing her preparations.

Idly, I followed her to the back room.

" _Why me? What did I do to deserve these curses; and for that matter, why am I just now experiencing all these other things?_

"I would assume it has something to do with you almost being bonded to a very old and powerful Viking. Taking his blood has awakened parts of you that were dormant."

" _I suppose that makes sense."_

Silence engulfed us and my nerves only continued to grow. Regardless of what happened, I was ready for this to be over. I desperately needed to know which Vampire I would inevitably be with—my lover or my tormentor.

During my pondering, I realized I still didn't know why Hekate gave me the charm around my neck. She was in the other room gathering more things so I called out to her. "Why did you give me this pendant? You were able to tell us where he was, and there was no possibility of him getting away."

"You will know when the time comes."

' _What does that mean?'_

"It means that I strongly felt you should have it. You should never question your instincts, so I made it for you. It's quite rare and invaluable so protect it well."

She was always talking so cryptically! Absentmindedly, I rubbed the charm finding comfort in its cold, smooth surface. If Hekate thought I needed this pendant, I wasn't going to argue with her; she was odd but she seemed to know what was going on.

"I'm ready now." Hekate said just as Eric and Pam walked in the door. Their clothes were covered in blood, and I had to bite back the vile at the mental images my brain was throwing at me of Marks' final minutes.

"Are you ready, Northman?"

He nodded while pulling me into a deep embrace. "I love you Sookie. I'll see you soon, lover." Quickly he kissed me and followed Hekate to the back room. While Pam was normally stoic, she was practically bubbling with excitement that Eric was so close to being back to normal. I matched the enthusiasm of her excitement but in nerves. The waiting was beginning to overwhelm me and I started to worry that I would pass out. The past couple of days had been spent worrying about what would happen if Eric didn't want to be with me after he got his memories back, but what if he did? What would it be like to be Eric Northman, Sheriff of Area 5's, girlfriend and bonded? Surprisingly, I could see myself living with him on a regular basis; waking up every evening with him by my side. He would have to play the part of badass sheriff, but at home he would be different with me; he would be like the Eric I've come to know the past couple of days. I think I'd even let him take me to all the vampire social events and help him out with my "gifts" anytime I could. Just like the first lady, I'd have to be the perfect political mate. Being a barmaid from Bon Temps I wasn't sure I couldn't handle that, but I had confidence Eric would help me when I needed it.

' _I wonder if we could married!'_ I thought excitingly. Nothing would please me more than to be Mrs. Eric Northman. How I loved the sound of that! _'Hello, I'm Mrs. Eric Northman!'_ My nerves were giving way to excitement as I thought of all these things and the wonderful times we would have. Maybe even be together for eternity if I decided to let him turn me. . Maybe.

I was still dreaming of our future when a commotion sounded in the back. Pam and I both jumped off our stools as a very angry Eric stormed out of the back room. He stood a little taller and his eyes barely contained a fury and confusion I had rarely seen. One look at him and my nerves came swelling back up with the fury of an intense hurricane.

' _Why is he so upset? Is it because he can't believe he loved me, or because of what Hallow did?_

His strong and boisterous voice filled the room. "Pamela, explain!"

This wasn't the Eric I knew, how did I think I could love him? How did I think he could love me; a stupid little pathetic human? I felt like I was being torn apart from the inside out. My vision started to blur and the last thing I saw before I passed out was Andre's black eyes swallowing me, laughing the whole time.


	9. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Sookie! Sookie, are you alright?" came Eric's worried voice.

"Sookie! Sookie, are you alright?" came Eric's worried voice.

My eyes slowly fluttered open, and I was once again encased with the vision of my angel. I felt heavy and very groggy from my fainting spell. Luckily, I didn't feel any sore spots so Eric must have caught me before I managed to crack my head open on the floor.

"Hey, baby, thanks for catching me" I smiled weakly at him.

"I am not an infant, don't refer to me as one." One sentence and I knew something was horribly, terribly wrong. I froze in his arms not sure what to do. Could my worst fears have come true? Did he really not want to be with me, or maybe it was just that we were in front of Pam. I never thought he would actually be different around her, but maybe I misgauged their relationship. My eyes bore into his, searching for the answers my heart feared to know. In his eyes, I saw mainly anger and confusion with a hint of fear. All that didn't mean anything, really, but what made my heart stop was the total lack of real emotion in his eyes; they looked dark and uninviting rather than loving and welcoming.

' _I figured he would be upset, but could he really just not feel for me after all that we had been through the past couple of days? Losing him would just_ _be the last traumatic experience I could handle. Maybe if we go talk at his house we could get this worked out. Surely he knows I'd do anything to work this out '_

"What did I do to make you so mad at me? I did everything I could to get you to come back with Pam! I thought you understood how hard this has been on me. All I wanted was to keep you with me, but I let you go! Please don't be upset with me. I know it's a lot to absorb—caring for a human and all, but can't you at least try and accept what's happened?" Hoping with all my heart he wouldn't leave me, I pleaded him with him to just evaluate everything that had happened.

Eric returned my glare with even more intensity than my own, doing some searching of his own. His beautiful brow furrowed deeply, and confusion was painted across his features.

"Sookie, I don't understand what you're talking about. Why is there more of my blood in you? I can feel you so clearly." He inhaled deeply and his eyes grew as wide as saucers; if they got any bigger, I think they would have popped right out of their sockets. "And my scent is all over you. You've yielded to me? And I can't even remember it?" A growl emanated from low in his throat as he stood up and started pacing.

"You've said it's been two weeks? I have no recollection of what's happened to me for two weeks! If Hallow were alive, I would rip her apart so slowly she would regret the day she was born! What is she mumbling about Pam?"

Understanding hit me like a mac truck. The blood drained out of my face and I had to fight not to loose consciousness again. I love life and I pride myself in making it through rough situations, but in that moment, Eric was making me regret I had ever been born. Everything that happened in my life was overwhelming, and I was finally accepting and being able to bear it all because of the love I'd found with Eric. During those nights spent talking in front of my fireplace, I opened up to him even more than I ever had with Bill; it had helped old wounds to heal. Now he was ripping off those scabs and tearing new holes all over my heart. This man knew me inside and out, and now that was gone. Knowing I would face the upcoming battles with Eric by my side was what was keeping me happy and sane; that had just been pulled out from under me and I didn't know what to do.

' _Oh god, Andre!'_ This meant I was now going to have to go with that monster unless I could somehow stay away from him. And even if I did manage to evade him, I wouldn't get to keep my normal life. I wouldn't get to see my little remaining family or friends. My vision was clouding, but I couldn't do anything to stop it. My body had gone numb, trying to shut itself off from the pain my heart was pouring out in truckloads. My world was crashing down around me and I didn't know which way to run.

"Sookie, you have to breathe." Pam whispered as she crouched down next to me and took my hand. Slowly, I inhaled, and it felt like thousands of little knives were pricking me everywhere. My eyes found Pam's and she cringed at the raw torment she saw in mine. "He doesn't remember what happened does he?" I whispered so lightly I'm sure it was only audible to her close vampire ears.

She shook her head no. "I gave him a brief overview while you were passed out."

"Andre." I voiced under my breath.

"What are you two talking about?" boomed a very frustrated and angry Eric. "What does Andre have to do with this?"

"Master, Andre came to Fangtasia a couple nights ago. He was sent by the Queen to retrieve Sookie for her retinue. Compton was sent to get her but failed." Eric's face lit up with surprise and concern flitted across his face for a brief moment. He looked down at me, as I still hadn't moved from where he left me on the floor. The lack of emotion in his eyes forced me to look down at the tile, gritting my teeth in agony.

"The Queen should not have gone around me on this. I promise I did not know." He looked over at Pam. "What happened? How is she still with us?"

Fear bubbled up inside me. I didn't know what this Eric thought of bonding, but I had a feeling I didn't want to know the answer. "Pam, please. I don't know if I can handle being here while you tell him this." Eric furrowed his brow in confusion again as he felt my heartache and fear across the bond. Apparently Pam didn't care about my pleas because she continued anyways.

"The only way I could think to save her for the time being was to tell Andre you had completed a blood bond with her."

"You _what_? You very well know, Pamela, that I have never in my thousand years, bonded to a human, and I _never_ will! How dare you put me in this situation? I would never weaken myself that way!" Eric had rose to his full height stepping closer and closer to Pam with every spoken word. His impressive body was quivering with the rage he was barely able to contain. I had no doubt that if it wasn't his own child standing in front of him, Pam would have met her final death already.

She lowered her head in submission to him. "Master, I only did this because she is very valuable to us. Wouldn't it be better to keep her in your Area rather than surrender her to Sophie-Anne's trifling whims?"

About this time I was feeling a lot of anger mixed in with my heartache. I was angry at myself for being so stupid to not only trust but to fall in love with Eric fucking Northman. Maybe because of Bill's betrayal, or Gran's death, or just being lonely in general I had given myself over to this man far to easily. I was angry that Eric had made me believe there was actually a caring part of him when he wasn't cursed. Deep in my heart I had always known this is what was going to happen; it's why I fought him so hard after the witch war. Angry that he was acting like it was so horrible to be bonded to me and the only reason he would do it would be to use me for my telepathy. I was getting so exasperated with people trying to use me for something. The thing that had made me so wonderful around my Eric is that he gave unconditionally. No bullshit or politics, or using me! Gathering myself off the floor, I went and interrupted their little conversation.

"Is there a reason ya'll are talking about me like I'm not here?" I shouted much louder than I had intended to.

"This is none of your concern. You will be fairly compensated above the agreed amount for keeping me safe. I will take you home shortly, but I will not bond with a human. Regretfully, you will have to go with Andre."

Everything that was left inside me broke out from my dam of self control. I let my words fly out of my mouth and my torrent of emotions pour into the bond I knew he could feel. "I knew it! I knew you would do this! The entire time we were together I kept telling you, you didn't have emotions, that you would never love me after you got your memories back. But no, you had to beg," I started stepping closer and closer to him pushing him back with pokes in the chest, "plead, convince, and show me that the caring side of you was still a part of this person." Motioning to him in disgust. "You made me trust you, Eric Northman, you made promises you swore you would keep! And now you're just going to give me over to Andre to rot and eventually die? How dare you! You absolutely disgust me." Trembling, I walked away from Eric, collapsed on a stool, and started crying as hard as humanly possible.

"I do not love," he replied simply.

' _Really? I couldn't have guessed that.'_

Pam reached for me, but I put my hand out and stopped her with a blue light coming from my palm. Eric, who had remained motionless against the wall during my little rant was examining me closely. "What is this?" he asked.

Pam gave a knowing smirk, "Oh by the way, she's part Fae. I tried to kill her for it, but you wouldn't let me." She scoffed at Eric and rolled her eyes.

In vampiric speed, Eric was before me with his fangs extended. "Perhaps that explains why I'm so drawn to her." Being scared for my life probably should have been at the forefront of my emotions, but I couldn't bring myself to be scared of him; even if this version of himself wouldn't stop Pam from ending me.

Hekate finally stepped out from the corner of the room and gave her input.

"Northman, you would do well to watch your tongue. Can't you feel the pain you're inflicting on your fated? The longer you fight her, the longer your lives will be in danger. Bond with her and perhaps your memories will come back."

"Demon, you would do well to bide your tongue. While your services are duly noted your opinions on how I conduct myself will be kept to yourself."

' _Stupid vampire pride! Give him time to cool down child. He's under a bit of shock right now.'_

Enduring the emotional unrest of being around Eric like this was becoming overwhelming. I placed my hands on Eric's face and looked deep in his eyes. With much effort I forced every feeling out of my body besides the love and peace I felt with him over the past two weeks. I shoved all of it his way across the weak bond.

"I love you with all my being, Eric Northman." He looked confused and scared with all the feelings I was sending his way. For a second, I even thought I saw recognition in his eyes, but it disappeared quickly and I refused to spend anymore time hoping for this man to love me. I removed my hands from his face and thought about going to a safe place as hard as possible. Feeling that gentle breeze I was learning came along with transporting myself, I opened my eyes to see—

' _What in cheese crackers? Could this day get any worse?'_

—to see Eric's dayroom. I crawled up on his bed and inhaled our mingled scents from the passionate nights we spent there. Grabbing Eric's pillow I began to cry as I took in his wonderful masculine smell and let myself think about the past couple of weeks and how much I enjoyed them. I cried even harder when I realized the little quickie in Eric's corvette was probably the last time I was going to enjoy the touch of my Viking sex god. After laying there for a while I drifted off to sleep, trying not to feel anything. I woke up to movement upstairs, so I assumed Eric and Pam had come back to the house. Looking back, I should have popped right to Gran's house, but instead, I went and hid in the bathroom. In my defense; my brain wasn't working very well through all this emotional upheaval.

The familiar click of the dayroom door sounded, and I heard Eric and Pam enter. Something flew across the room and broke against the wall. "She has been in my resting chamber! How could I have been so foolish?" he roared.

"You were not yourself."

"I'm going to have to change all the codes and perhaps even move now."

"I highly doubt she would ever hurt you. She has . . . strong feelings for you, even for a human. She was very loyal to you. Besides, being Fae she could just get in here anyways."

The bed creaked with the weight of Eric's massive form. "She won't last long with him."

"No. He will take her body and soul before he's finished with her. Though, she may be able to evade him with her gifts."

"I can't bond with her. I've lived for a thousand years only because of how I am. Lowering myself to bond with a human, part Fae or not, is simply unacceptable."

"Master, I know you were not yourself, but you did feel very strongly for her. You didn't block me very well, and I felt it too. I think you loved her, it was not a feeling I had experienced since before my death, but I believe it was love. It surprises me that none of that came through even if your memories didn't."

"I do not love, Pamela, I do not feel for humans." He said very loudly, seemingly trying to convince himself more than Pam.

In my hiding spot in the bathroom, I crouched down while listening to their conversation as silent tears began sliding down my cheeks. A small sob escaped my lips, and the next thing I knew, I was being held up against the wall by Eric whose hand was around my throat.

"Why are you here?" He practically growled at me, baring his fangs.

"I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking clearly when I popped out, and this is where I ended up." My eyes fell to the floor. "Apparently, this is still where I feel most safe."

His gaze softened, and he lowered me to the floor. "Go. Controlling myself is difficult with all your human emotions clouding my mind. Don't come here again."

I nodded and popped to my real bed. Without relent, I cried for the next two hours throwing myself a little pity party.

' _At least before all this, we were kind of friends. Now not only does he not want to be with me, but he practically hates me. How could I think a thousand-year-old being could be capable of love?'_

Sleep demanded I give way to it after several more hours of crying. My dreams started out beautiful with a replay of my times with Eric. It took a turn for the worse as the light left Eric's eyes and he stilled underneath my touch. He felt rigid and unwelcoming compared to the welcoming embrace I was wrapped up just a moment ago. Looking back up to his face I saw nothing there. No hint of emotion on his features. His gaze was off into the distance; I followed it but saw nothing but a dark haze. Slowly the outline of a man appeared getting closer and closer to us. Every nerve was standing at attention and my instincts told me to run as fast and as far as I could away from this intruder. Instead of running though I stayed by Eric's side having confidence he would be able to protect. The figure made it's way out of the haze and I gasped as Andre made an appearance in my dreams.

"You have no claim on her, Viking. Hand her over to me." His evil voice swirled around me. My vision turned red at the demented images I saw in Andre's mind. I clung to Eric as my lifeline, firmly believing he would never let that creature take me away from him.

"Of course, Andre, she is yours." Horror exuberated in me at his words. He was my lover, protector, and friend; he would never deceive me like that! One look in his twisted eyes and I knew he was being serious.

"No! Eric, _please_! Don't you love me? What did I do? Please, I'll do anything to not have to go with him."

"Love you?" Andre mocked at me, "Of course he doesn't love you. Vampires do not love, unless it is the love for death and blood." Both Eric's and Andre's maniacal laugh filled the air.

"He is right. We do not love, but I did use that illusion to make you yield to me. You never meant anything to me, you never will!" Their laughter continued as Andre roughly grabbed my arm and pulled me, kicking and screaming, away from Eric and into the deep dark abyss of nothing.

I awoke with a scream on my lips. The tears I thought were dried up started overflowing again as it occurred to me that dream was probably pretty accurate to reality. Why did men have to be so cruel? Was honest love really so hard to come by?

' _My first love betrayed me and now the love of my life has disregarded me like a used towel. What a mess I'm in.'_

Sleeping seemed like a lost cause at this point; visions of Andre biting me, taking me, beating me kept dancing in front of my eyes every time I closed them. I got ready for my day feeling groggy and just plain worn out.

The next week all went about the same as that first night. I convinced Sam to let me come back to work to have something to do, but I was just a walking empty shell. My heart had been obliterated into so many pieces that I didn't know how to fix it just yet. Due to my train-wrecked state, I was getting severe headaches from not properly blocking people's thoughts out. Most of the time, I was able to keep it together in public, but every now and then, something would ignite the fire of betrayal laying dormant inside me, and I'd have to go out to my car for a good cry. My body was reacting to the emotional stress as well; I'd lost 7 pounds in only a week. It wasn't that I was trying to starve myself, but I never felt hungry, and when I did eat, I'd often throw it up later.

Eric never called or talked to me about what had happened or what was going to ensue with the whole Andre situation. This only deepened my pain every day; I guess some sick part of me was still hoping he would come back into my life apologizing for what happened and declare his love for me.

Sam tried to get me to talk to him but dropped it after I vehemently told him no five times. I knew he was trying to be a good friend, and I could hear Gran punishing me for my bad manners, but it was just too soon. That Saturday I was feeling particularly awful after the end of my shift. Exhaustion was my new best friend and it was beating me up inside and out. Nausea swept through me as I got in the car to go home. The drive was too short, and I felt the dread and fear of being alone creep up inside me as I ascended my front porch steps.

I had just settled down on the couch with a box of Kleenex, a whole gallon of ice cream, and Gone with the Wind when my doorbell rang. I hesitated before answering it and scanned the front porch. All I found was a blank hum.

' _Vampire. So it's either Bill, Pam, Eric, or Andre_ _.'_

"It's me, now open up!" came Pam's annoyed voice.

Jumping up, I went to the door and invited her in. More than anything, I was just happy to prolong my long evening of not sleeping and heartbroken tears. Pam looked me up and down, appraising my condition.

"You two are both ridiculous." She sighed and sat down in one of my kitchen table chairs.

"Why are you here, Pam?"

"Sookie, you should go to him. He may not know all that happened, but I promise you, his feelings for you are still there, and let's just say he's not coping very well. Everyone is avoiding him like the plague at Fangtasia; they're terrified he's going to kill the first person who makes a wrong move. The fangbangers won't even approach him he's in such a foul mood! I've already had to replace three computer monitors from him throwing them across the room in an outrage. In all the time I've known him I have never seen him this distraught over something!"

Unfortunately, I couldn't stop the tears from trickling down my cheeks. "Then why isn't he here? Why was he so against bonding with me? Why did he practically tell me he never wants to see me again?"

Pam shrugged nonchalantly as if the answer was the most obvious thing in the world. "Because he's Eric. He's not accustomed to such emotions—certainly not such strong emotions. He can still feel you all the way in Shreveport you know. Your bond is quite strong for a couple who has only exchanged blood twice. There are times when he's sitting on his throne and his face contorts into such pain, I know he's feeling what you're going through."

Humiliation ripped through me. "Well that's just fantastic! So not only am I rejected, but I can't even go through that loss with my pride intact!"

She growled and stood over me. "Don't you get it you stupid girl? He still loves you. My master, Sheriff of Area 5 still has feelings for you! Now stop being so damn stubborn and come with me to talk to him. You two must get this resolved before Fangtasia goes under, " she paused briefly and grief flitted across her face, "and before you're supposed to go see the Queen. She called last night."

Fury boiled up in me and I stood up to face her. "You know Pam, I am sick and tired of only being wanted because you stupid high and mighty vampires need something from me. I don't give a flip if Fangtasia loses all its business. You can just stick it where the sun shines! I rescind your invitation."

Now it was Pam's turn to look furious as the unseen force of magic compelled her to walk briskly out my front door. "When are we supposed to go? How long do I have before he comes for me?" I asked through gritted teeth.

"Two weeks. Go to him, Sookie, please." I rolled my eyes at her and slammed the door in her face. After watching my movie and having yet another soul-tearing cry, I drifted off to sleep on the couch. Once again, I found myself in a red haze again with Andre's bed in the center of this dream reality. Like my first dream I looked like the walking dead and was chained to the corner post. Andre kicked me repeatedly eliciting moans of pain from me. Eric sat in his throne by the bed watching everything, but not doing anything to help me. He was egging Andre on and giving him torture suggestions.

"Why not use the crop on her? Heal her wounds when she passes out from the pain so you can continue with the fun." Eric snickered at me with glee in his eyes at getting to watch this "fun".

"Eric, why? Please don't let him do this to me!" He started laughing as the first of Andre's crop strokes slammed into the sensitive skin on my back. I jerked up on the couch and had to take a moment to still my thrumming heart. Knowing I wouldn't be getting anymore sleep again that night I went to my bedroom and threw on my pink fuzzy robe. I went down to the kitchen and made myself a pot of coffee. Sitting at the table, I thought about all that had happened in the past year. My gran had been brutally murdered, my brother accused of said murder, I'd met a vampire, fell in love, had my heart broken, almost been killed more times than I could remember, and yet I was still here. The lonely crazy Sookie Stackhouse of a year ago no longer existed. I was valuable now and knew how to control my telepathy better. I also knew who I could count and who my real friends were. Really, I knew who I was as an individual more than ever. The past couple of days had been really difficult, but if there was anything I could learn from my past experiences is that I was a survivor and didn't need a man to get by. I would get through all of this even if it hurt like hell all the way through.

' _I am not going to by a bystander to my own life! Eric and Andre will not be allowed to dictate what happens to me!'_ Well that was easier said than done; one had just torn my heart to shreds and the other was trying to make me his prisoner. The past week had been unbearable, but it was time to move on; I couldn't wallow in pain and self pity for the rest of my life. That was so uncharacteristically Stackhouse! For the next hour, I debated my options with Andre. My only solutions included going to the Queen and asking to be bonded to Bill instead, give myself to Andre without a fight and hope he was gentle, run away from everything, or do my best to fight when he came and kill him. Deciding the latter was my best chance at keeping my normal life, I spent the next hour figuring out how to best prepare myself for what a battle with a vampire would entail.

' _Hekate said she would help train my powers if I ever needed it, perhaps I should take her up on her offer. I'm going to have to be as prepared as possible if I'm going to best Andre; even with my new "gifts"'_

My powers were all I had at my disposal, and I was fairly sure that wasn't going to be enough; I still had to be able to use something to kill him.

' _I wish I would have had Eric teach me to use those swords while I had the chance._ ' I wistfully thought.

' _Pam'_ my mind whispered to me. _'Pam would know how to use a sword. She is Eric's child after all.'_ I did my best to ignore that little voice not wanting to endure the humiliation of having to call and ask for her help after the way I had treated her tonight. After another half hour of thinking of other possible options, I finally admitted defeat. Tomorrow I was going to call Hekate and ask for help in developing my gifts, and then I was going to call Pam to see if she would teach me some sword fighting 101.

Feeling much more in control of my future, I went up to bed with more of a bounce to my step and purpose in my heart. For the first time in a week I slept the sleep of the dead, dreaming only about Andre's head falling from his finally dead, flaking body.


	10. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I'm so excited to hear your response to this chapter! I've been working painstakingly on it for three days practically tearing my hair out.

Hey guys! I'm so excited to hear your response to this chapter! I've been working painstakingly on it for three days practically tearing my hair out.

My beta pointed out to my that apparently I'm stupid when it comes to word as I hadn't accepted the changes and so it still looks likes there's typos in my chapters- totally not my beta's fault because she rocks. I'm going to go back and try to get all of them fixed. Again thankyou to all of you for your reviews. They have meant SO much to and have kept me writing- especially with this chapter. I tried to take your suggestions and put them into this chapter!

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The next morning I awoke feeling more rested than I had in a very long time. My alarm clock told me it was already ten in the morning! Peaceful sleep had done my body and heart good; I still felt the pain, but it was a small echo rather than a roaring fury.

Deciding I hadn't eaten properly in far too long, I went down to the kitchen and fixed myself a big southern breakfast of bacon, scrambled eggs, french toast, and grits. Everything tasted so good to my regained senses, and my stomach did a jump for joy at finally being able to keep something down. Feeling like a pig, I scarfed down every last bite, knowing I had just made up for all the calories I missed last week. Completely sated for the first time in a while, I took a long hot shower, letting the stress of the past week dissipate and thoroughly thought over what I had planned to do. The Pam part was a little iffy, but if Andre was going to come at me with a sword, I had to be able to block a blow or two, and I needed to be able to decapitate him, not just fend him off. I was actually looking forward to training with Hekate. I had always seen my telepathy as a curse and still kind of did, but these new gifts would help me live my life the way I wanted, and for that, I was grateful.

After several minutes under the hot water my muscles felt relaxed, and the grime was finally gone, taking with it my guilt at feeling such self pity the past week. It wasn't like me to feel bad for myself, but a girl can only take so much! Eric had really meant a lot to me and it was rough having him not know what was going on. A fresh wave of pain washed over me, and I gripped the wall for support. I let it just hurt for a while and let a few tears fall before it passed. It was getting easier to deal with, but I had a long way to go until my heart was whole again.

When the water finally started to get cold, I got out and dried myself off. Besides my work uniform, all I'd worn the past several days was an old pairs of sweats that were comfortable and fit my sullen mood, so today, I went for one of the brightest things in my closet: a neon pink sundress with white frill trim. To match, I wore white thick bangle bracelets and white, heeled flip-flops. I blew my hair dry, curled a little bit of it, then added more than the usual makeup to my clear completion.

Looking in the mirror, I saw the strong, capable, smart, independent me starting back. I smiled at myself for the improved wardrobe and attitude.

 _'I can do this!'_ I chanted to myself.

Sitting down on my bed, I closed my eyes and thought about Hekate's little shop. That familiar breeze swept across my face, and I arrived at my destination.

"Hello, child" She called to me from behind some shelves. "Good to see you're using more of your abilities."

Seeing the old woman hobbling around her shop brought a warmth to my heart that I'd been missing the past couple of days. "I want to take you up on your offer to help me develop my gifts. I need to kill a Vampire."

She poked her head around the shelf she was currently rearranging. "Not your fated, I hope."

"No! Of course not, but he's not my fated." The pinpricks of sadness poked at my heart thinking about the night Eric and I had talked about that possibility after making love to each other. At the time, I had actually started to believe her crazy stories that the gods had a plan for me and Eric. I guess the fairytale experience of being loved by Eric had my mind confused over the difference between fiction and reality.

"Oh, alright then, I'll help." I laughed heartily, enjoying the unfamiliar sound coming from me; it had been a long time since I'd laughed. Only Hekate would agree to killing a Vampire, no questions asked. She finished rearranging things and came to sit on a stool by me. "Which vampire are we killing and why?" I told her about everything about the Queen sending Bill and then Andre to capture me and how Pam had stalled them with the blood bond story. My heart clenched and my eyes teared up as I told her how Eric was no longer willing to bond with me, so I wasn't safe from Andre any longer and was going to have to fight him.

"Hmm. Well, my dear, it sounds like this is all unnecessary if you would simply talk with your fated. You two should be bonded, it's what's meant to be."

Defensively, I reminded her that it was Eric that didn't want me, not the other way around. "I'm tired of letting other people dictate my life. I want to be in control. If the stupid Vampire queen thinks she can just come and take someone against their will, I'm going to show her she's got another thing coming!"

Hekate was silent for quite some time thinking about everything I had just told her. After a while, her eyes cleared and her jaw set, indicating that she had reached a conclusion of sorts. "Of course I will help you, but on one condition." I cocked my head and raised an eyebrow in question.

"And what would that be?" My mind raced through the possibilities of what she could possibly want or need from me.

"You will go to Northman and try to talk to him first. If he is still unwilling to bond to you, then I will help you. If only to give the two of you more time to come to your senses." She tsk tsk'd and walked back to her shelves to continue reorganizing. My mouth dropped open and all my emotions flew everywhere at once. The possibility of seeing Eric made my heart jump for joy and scream in panic.

 _'What! You can't possibly expect me to do that. You saw what happened the other day, there's no way I can see him again!'_

 _'You can and you will if you want my help'_

' _I won't bond to him out of necessity to survive. I'll only do it if he is willing to admit he has feelings for me.'_

She looked over to me and rolled her eyes. _'Yes, dear, that is the point of this bond: to bring the two of you closer. A bond done out of business or because you must would only bring bitterness.'_

Her words took the fight out of me as I realized she really was still on my side. She wasn't trying to force me into a loveless marriage of sorts.

' _I really don't think I can handle seeing him again. It's been a rough week. He really hurt me.'_

"And do you think he did that on purpose? It's been a very hard time for him. Vampires have to be in control, and he's had none of that for two weeks. By now he's had time to process everything and regain some of that control. Just go to him and see what happens. If you admit it to yourself, I'd bet you've been missing him" She winked at me and a knowing sparkle twinkled in her eye. Hekate kind of reminded me of my Gran with the way she pointed out my faults in a way I couldn't get mad at her. Sighing in resignation, I accepted my fate and thought about what I would say to Eric tonight.

 _'Come back tomorrow and we'll start your training. Trust in your heart young one, your instincts will not lead you wrong.'_

"Alright. I'll see you tomorrow morning. I'm blaming you if this doesn't go well tonight." Her laughter filled the room as I popped back to my bedroom. For the next hour, I walked up to my full-length mirror, trying to prepare a speech for when I saw Eric. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't bite back the anger in my voice in every speech. Our last time together had left a bitter taste in my mouth, and I wasn't able to talk very rationally even to the mirror.

Deciding that I just needed to get over this so I could actually talk with him instead of yelling the whole time, I popped into Eric's dayroom. My breath caught as I took in his scent and the peace that came with being so close to him. Quietly, I turned on a light and took in his large frame spread out on the massive bed. It was so freeing seeing his like this; while he was sleeping, it was easy to pretend he was still my Eric. Using my index finger, I stroked from his neck down his sculpted chest, over his hip, swirled over his thigh, ending at the tips of his toes. I went over to the other side of the bed and snuggled up next to him. Surprise overtook me when his arm moved to encompass me, and a breathy "Sookie," escaped his lips. Looking up at him, I realized he was still in his daytime rest.

 _'Some part of him still longs for me.'_ I let that wash over me and give me courage for the conversation I was going to have to have with him later tonight. Somehow, I knew he wasn't going to be nearly as easy to deal with after he was awake and in full Sheriff mode. Without much luck, I tried to get Eric's arm off me. He was really, _really_ heavy during his daytime rest, like a stone statue or something. Grinning, I popped out from under his arm but misgauged it and ended up to close to the side of the bed. I teetered on the side, trying not to fall over the edge, but to no avail; I fell off with a loud squeal, grabbing the sheets as I went. I landed on the ground with a loud thud and my cheeks stained with embarrassment. Luckily, no one was around to see it, but it was still pretty clumsy of me. Slowly, I peeked over the edge to see if Eric was still sleeping.

 _'You can be so stupid sometimes Stackhouse. Of course he's still sleeping!'_

Pulling the sheets off the bed had revealed that my Viking was naked underneath the sheets (of course). I sat on the side of the bed studying his body, wanting to reach out and touch him so badly, but that seemed wrong somehow, so I refrained. However, before I left, I moved back over to him and gave him a kiss on the cheek then returned to my house.

Back in my room, I laughed at myself for how stupid I could be. Seeing my vampire during his day rest was slightly pathetic and stalkerish, but I needed to do it for some reason. Besides being hurt from his betrayal, Hekate was right. I was really starting to just miss him. I loved him so much, regardless of all that happened; it wasn't entirely his fault. This wasn't like Bill's betrayal where he had a chance to tell me the truth time and time again but didn't. Eric was genuine when he was under the curse. He didn't really get a chance to accept or reject me since he didn't remember our time together at all. Overreaction was a bit of an understatement to how he responded to the situation, but I could kind of see his point of view. I just hoped he'd calmed down a bit.

' _Sheesh! What a mess.'_

The rest of the day went by so slowly, probably because I was anxious and excited all day, looking forward to talking with Eric. Now that I had made my mind up to go and had resolved my anger issues, I was really excited to see my Vampire again. It was most likely stupid of me to hope for anything, but I couldn't help it.

At five, I had to go into work, but I didn't mind a bit; I was even a little early. I thought I was going to go crazy sitting in my house watching the minutes tick by. Unfortunately, work proved to be not much of a distraction since it was a Sunday and we were dead slow. My mind constantly wandered to Eric and what I was going to say to him this evening. One component of me hoped he had had time to think about things and decided to give me a chance, but another part knew it was more likely nothing had changed.

After what seemed like forever, I was off of my shift and bounced out to my car. Not wanting to waste time, I looked around making sure no one could see me and popped back home. Quickly, I took a shower and washed the burger smell off my skin. I decided to wear the first dress Eric had ever seen me in: the white one with little red flowers on it. Curling my hair felt like the longest activity in the world, but I finally got it done and applied a little makeup. Completing my look, was my red fuck-me heels that he seemed to like so much. Approving of myself in the mirror, I popped straight into my car and barreled down the road toward the love of my life.

By the time I got to Fangtasia I could barely contain the bundle of emotions that were bouncing around inside me. The line at Fangtasia was long, but they weren't near as busy as usual. It was a testament to Eric's business finesse that a full-time bar was open on Sunday at all. Not bothering to stand in line, I went straight up to Pam.

"Well hello, Sookie. Decided to take my advice anyways?" How she managed to sound so sarcastic all the time I'll never understand. I guess being a vampire gives you centuries to perfect an attitude problem. I really wanted to throw something sarcastic back at her, but in case this didn't go well with Eric tonight, I would still need to ask for her help.

"Maybe. Is he here?" My heart frantically pounded in my chest, hoping he was there, but at the same time hoping he wasn't so I could avoid this entire situation a little longer. I didn't think I could take being rejected a second time, and it would be all my fault for coming here in the first place.

"Yes he is." She gave me a fangy grin. "He won't be able to resist you in that dress. If he wouldn't have my head, I'd take you out back and fu—"

"Pam! _Shut-up_!" My cheeks were scarlet and I felt heat rush up into my face. Besides Eric, no one, especially a woman, had ever talked to me like that.

"He's in his office." She smirked at me, still giving me a thorough eye fuck.

"Thanks." I gave her a weak smile, took a deep breath, and made my way to his office, ignoring all the stares I was getting from Vampires and humans alike. Standing in front of his door, I thought I would throw up from the anticipation of seeing him again since our terrible parting last week (well, see him while he was awake). I lifted my hand to knock and started having second thoughts.

' _I could just go to the bathroom and pop to my car and drive home now and he'd never know I was here.'_

I lowered my hand to do just that, but as I was turning around, the door opened to reveal Eric in all his 6'4 awesomeness. He was wearing his traditional black tank top and black slacks. My heart and nether regions both lurched at seeing that impressive man again. My inner me did an outright happy dance when his eyes grew wide and his fangs popped out at seeing me in the dress.

"Hi," I said timidly. "Could we talk for a minute?"

"I'd rather your mouth was busy with other things." He leered at me. Relief and comfort washed through me at the return of his normal playful and perverted nature. This was the Sheriff Eric I knew. I rolled my eyes at him and walked past him into his office. I sat down on the couch and was taken aback when Eric joined me instead of sitting in his chair. I felt like he was seeing me for the first time; he kept looking me up and down with wonder in his eyes.

We sat there in silence for a long time. Neither of us seemed to know what to say or could even speak at all. I began to fidget, feeling sorry I had come. Remembering the way the conversation had gone between me and my mirror earlier, I was the first to speak.

"Look, I'm really sorry about yelling at you the other day. To be honest, I wasn't expecting you to still want to be with me, but I was definitely _not_ expecting you to have no memory of what happened at all. I felt betrayed."

He took a few moments to collect his thoughts. That's something I liked about vampires; they rarely spoke without thinking first. "My reaction may have been a little strong." I gave him a look that said ' _duh, dipshit_.'

"It's very frustrating not knowing what's going on or what's happened to you for two entire weeks." He looked uncomfortable explaining himself. I got the feeling that he didn't have to that too often, and it was taking a lot out of him.

"I can't even imagine. But I'm sure you can understand my frustration of being the one with the knowledge of everything that's happened and having to deal with the fact that you don't know. "

He took my hand in his and looked deep in my eyes. For half a millisecond, I saw the façade disappear from his eyes. He silently pleaded with me to give him some understanding. "These past couple of days have been rough on me as well. I have all these feelings floating around that I haven't experienced in over a thousand years and I have absolutely no idea why. What exactly happened between us?"

I hadn't been prepared for that question. This Eric didn't talk about his weaknesses or concerns with me. He must have been pretty torn up about not having any answers to his many questions. And I really was the only one who could explain things to him. Telling him everything had a certain appeal, but emotionally, I was completely unable to talk about all that had happened without bawling uncontrollably over what I'd lost. My heartbeat picked up a couple more paces at the new wave of nerves hit me, and I thought about all that had happened between us. Afriad of how he would react to the truth, I gave him a brief overview. "You know, we had sex obviously and we talked a little, fought some witches, and uh, that's about it" I shrugged.

He leaned in close to my face, making my breath hitch. "No, there's more to it than that. I crave you, and I don't like it." That hit a nerve and began to fuel my fury.

"Well I'm so sorry to inconvenience you. It seems all I am is a huge nuisance that does things to aggravate you. I'll have you know—" He crashed his lips to mine before I could finish my sentence. All his fury and confusion must have been poured into that kiss because it was enough to knock me off my knees and make my head spin. My hands flew around his neck and I fisted my hands in his hair pulling him close to me. I crawled onto his lap and let my hands roam across his chest rememorizing all the lines and contours of his perfect body. He pulled back and looked at me, surprised by the amount of lust I'm sure he was feeling from me.

"It's sheer torture not knowing what I've done for you to finally return my desires."

I really didn't care, I just wanted him to shut up and keep kissing me. I had missed his touch so much the past couple of days, and now that he was so close, I was ravenous for it. I ground my hips down into his hoping to get his thinking back on track.

"Ugh, you are incredible, woman!" I snickered and started nipping his neck. He grabbed me and flipped us over so he was hovering above me. His face grew serious and business like, "I will allow a bond between us. But no one will know besides the Queen, Andre, Pam, and us." He started kissing me passionately again, determined to claim every part of me all over again. I kissed him back enjoying the familiar taste of his mouth on mine, of his hands caressing up and down my sides, and his weight pushing me down into the couch.

' _Why?'_ I growled internally at my little inner voice.

' _Why does he want to bond_? _'_ His hand pulled down my dress and gently palmed my aching breast. We both moaned simultaneously at the sensation. Expertly he unclasped my bra and had my dress and undergarments on the floor in seconds. He latched onto my nipple, and I groaned at the sensations he was bringing me.

' _Why?'_ I was ready to be with my Vampire again, but that little voice wouldn't shut up. I knew I was going to have to appease it before I could enjoy my sex god uninterrupted. I pushed against his shoulders, silently asking him to stop. He didn't stop though, and I was trapped underneath him while he ravenously worshipped my breasts.

"Eric, wait, I have to . . . oh, god." He nipped my now rock hard nipples, and I began to feel the pressure already building in my center. I was losing my resolve more and more every second and knew I had to get away from him if I wanted to ask my question, so I closed my eyes and popped from lying beneath him to sitting in his chair. He fell into the couch then sat up with a confused expression on his face. I crossed my arms over my chest to cover myself; even though he'd seen me naked a thousand times now.

"It's going to take some time to get used to that," he growled.

"Sorry but I need to know _why_ first. Why are you willing to bond with me now? You were very against it last week."

Once again, he looked aghast at having to explain himself to me. His words didn't come out in their normal smooth pattern. "I . . . well . . . you're nice to have around."

"I'm nice to have around? That's it?" I raised my eyebrows at him.

"Well yes and you're very valuable to me."

Anger tore through me at his words. Here I thought we were about to come to terms with our feelings, but no! I was just an asset to him, another valuable.

I flew out of the chair and put my clothes back on while I ranted at him, "I'm valuable to you? _Valuable_? I am _not_ some asset to be used whenever you want. Thanks for the offer, but I refuse to bond to a Vampire as emotionally dead as you are! If I bond to any man, it will be because he loves me and I love him. Plain and simple buddy! So if you ever want to have anything to do with me again, you better admit your feelings to yourself. You know where to find me if you change your mind."

I went to storm past him but he stood in my way. "Sookie, you can't deny me. Andre will not be fair to you like I have been."

"I'm tired of having my decisions made for me. Vampires will not control my life any more. And what's this crap about you being fair to me? So what? You're just like Andre but have learned to play nice better? You're a monster just like the rest of them!"

He actually looked a little hurt at my last statement, but he did move aside. I stormed out of his office and through the club as the first tears strolled down my face. I was very glad I had listened to that annoying little voice, hearing his hurtful words would have been ten times worse if it had been after sex.

"I guess it didn't go well?" Pam asked while taking in my disheveled state.

"What do you think?" I asked bitterly while I stormed past her. Stopping halfway to my car, I realized I still needed to talk to Pam. I stormed back to her and had to control the impulse to punch her in the face for the gloating look she was giving me.

"I need your help with something. Could you come by my house later tonight?" Her eyebrow raised and she snickered at me. "Always the mystery, aren't you?" I ignored her and walked back to my car. "Oh, and Pam, don't tell Eric" I knew she had heard me, so I jumped in my car and drove back to Bon Temps.

Using anger to cover the sadness looming under the surface, I stayed up and waited for Pam. To keep myself busy, I cleaned my much neglected house with anger in every activity. I scrubbed every nook and cranny and even bleached the bathrooms. I was exhausted and had just sat down on the couch by the time I finally heard a knock at my door.

"Come in!" I yelled, ready to get dealing with Pam over with.

"Hello, dear." My blood froze and my mind became enveloped in a haze of pure unadulterated panic. That voice was the soundtrack to my nightmares. I could already feel the light fading from my soul and my stomach threatened to spill all of its contents all over the floor, but I would never give him the pleasure of seeing he had that kind of affect on me.

"You should really see who it is before you invite someone in," Andre said as he strolled into my living room.

"I'm expecting someone," I told him, hoping it would deter him from any devious plans he may have had planned. He eyed me questioningly. My mind went into overdrive trying to think of some way out of this situation. I opened my mouth to rescind his invitation, but thought better of it and closed my mouth. Making him leave would only alert him to the fact I didn't' feel protected as Eric's bonded. Now was not the time to challenge him, I was no where near ready to deal with him. Quickly I made up some reason that would be in line with the whole bonded story.

"Pam is coming over tonight to help me move some things over to Eric's house," I stammered. "That's why I've been cleaning all this up, I'm planning on renting my place out as soon as I can." I lied through my teeth hoping he would buy it. He leaned against the doorway, giving me a smile that made me heart stop in fear of what he had planned.

"Hmm. It would seem then that there's no reason for my visit tonight. The Queen and I were concerned that your bond to Northman was invalid since you were still living here, and there have been reports you're not even spending time together anymore."

' _Shit! Lie lie lie!'_

"Oh no, we were both just preparing everything for my move over there. Quitting my job, cleaning up, saying goodbye to some friends. Human things." I gave him my best southern belle sweet smile.

"I see." He nodded his head in understanding. He was before me in vampire speed and it took all my self-control not to pop out of the room, but I knew that would give away my secret too soon. He needed to die soon after finding out I was Fae. "Because you don't want to know what would happen to Eric if you were lying about the bond." My heart wretched thinking about Eric being bound in silver and tortured by this monster. I hoped my extreme fear didn't show on the outside. I knew he could smell my fear, but I was hoping he would account it to him being creepy in general instead of the fact I had something to hide.

"Well, it's a good thing we're not then isn't it?" I responded, my voice coming out a little shakier than I would have liked.

"I don't believe you! You're coming with me now and if the Viking wants you he can come and prove the bond you two share!" A scream threatened to escape my throat not wanting to go with this monster. I remained as calm as possible as his cool clammy hand encased my forearm and started dragging me off the couch.

"Isn't this disobeying the Queen's orders? Couldn't you get in trouble?" I was grasping at straws to get him to leave me alone without using my ability. He laughed and turned to look at me.

"I'm the Queen's second and her child. She won't harm me."

"Hello, Andre. What a surprise seeing you here, is there something I can help you with?" He looked over at Pam in surprise and frustration. He obviously didn't believe my poor attempt at lying, but here was the evidence in front of him. He released the hold on my arm and I plopped back down on the couch.

"Hey, Pam, glad to see you're here. I was just getting ready to pack the things I'm going to need at Eric's house. If it's not to far beneath you, could you throw the clothes in my closet into a box while I show Andre out?" My words poured out quickly in my nervous state.

"Sure. You are my mistress now." She winked at me and walked upstairs.

Andre watched as Pam ascended the stairs with a bemused expression on his face. "She seems to have accepted that her Master has bonded to a human." he commented.

"Yes. As much as a Vampire and human could be, we were friends before this happened." It was obvious Andre was feeling more and more uncomfortable in this situation. I was starting to feel more uneasy as well since I still wasn't sure he was going to let me go. No doubt he expected to find me alone and heartbroken. Without being bonded to Eric, he could have whisked me away right then and there—judging by the bruises starting to form on my wrist, that was exactly what his plan had been. I was thanking my lucky stars I had asked Pam to stop by later and that she had actually done so.

"I understand we're expected to make a presence for the Queen in two weeks time," I said as I shifted further back in the couch to get away from him. "I don't mean to be rude, but as you can see I was telling the truth and Pam and I need to finish everything so we can get back to Eric's before dawn. I'm sure you understand. I look forward to seeing you in two weeks, Andre." My stomach turned at that last part, but I didn't want to give him a reason to visit me again.

He backed up and nodded to me. His words came out short and clipped, obviously upset that he had been outdone once again. "Of course. Good evening, Ms. Stackhouse." And he was gone. I stayed on the couch not trusting my legs to support me. My breathing was still erratic, so I took long deep breaths to steady my heart. Seeing Andre again and living through it was quite an experience.

Pam strolled back into the room with two big boxes in her arms. "Quick thinking for a human. You saved all our lives with your little story." She set the boxes down and stared at me.

"What are those for, Pam?" I asked while looking at the big boxes on my living room floor.

Her face turned up into a huge grin that just screamed bad news. "You're going to have to live with Eric now; they're obviously watching you. These are the boxes of clothes you requested . . . mistress." She said sarcastically while taking the seat opposite of me on the couch.

I frowned at her, unable to think of a valid reason why I wouldn't need to live with him. My main concern was that we couldn't keep this charade up forever. When we didn't show up to the Queen's little meeting, heads were going to roll. "What's going to happen to Eric when they find out we're not bonded?"

"He's working on a story as to why he would need you to pretend to be his bonded and couldn't tell anyone. Probably something about trying to lure his enemy out of the shadows, blah blah blah."

My heart swelled with relief. "Good. That's one last person I'll have to worry about getting hurt because of me."

Pam leaned in close and took a serious tone, "Until you guys get over yourselves and actually go through with the bond, you will have to stay with Eric, for both of your safeties." My chest heaved with an exasperated sigh.

' _How do I keep getting myself into these situations?'_

"What did you actually call me here for?" Pam asked, effectively changing the subject.

"Well, I'm not going to bond with Eric just because he wants to keep me around as an asset," Pam huffed in frustration at me, "but I'm not going to let Andre take me without a fight. I start training my abilities with Hekate tomorrow, and I want you to help train me with a sword." Normally surprising a vampire is a hard thing to do, but Pam's eyebrows shot up to her hairline and she roared with laughter.

"You can't be serious Sookie. You? Fight Andre? It would be hard for most Vampires to best him!"

I stood up and paced in front of my couch. I was so tired of people underestimating me and thinking I couldn't take care of things on my own. "Hey, I don't have a choice here. I won't bond to Eric just to get out of this, and I'm not running away from the only life I've ever known! Andre doesn't know about my abilities so I'll have the element of surprise on my side. I'm not asking you to make me an expert, but Andre uses a sword and I need to be able to block a bit and decapitate him. Plus, I need a sword to start with."

She gaped at me with true concern in her eyes. "You're serious about this aren't you? Eric is not going to like this one bit." I stopped my pacing and glared at her. "Eric isn't going to know about this. Now that I have to live at his house anyways we can just use his little sword fighting room when he's not home, and I can practice during the day."

Another protest was on her lips so I held my hand up to motion for her to stop. "I am doing this. So you can either help me so maybe I won't die, or you do nothing and I'll most likely die." Her eyes narrowed at me and she carefully considered my words for a few minutes.

"Fine. I will help you, but I think you're foolish." My lips turned up into a smile. It felt good knowing that I was going to be as prepared as possible for when Andre came for me. Hope for survival started tugging at my heart.

"Now, let's get you to Eric's home before dawn so we can explain everything to him." Reluctantly, I gathered a few essentials and the boxes Pam had packed before getting in my car and following her to Eric's house. I had to fight hard to fend off the call of sleep. I had been through so much today and it was close to four in the morning already. Finally, we pulled onto the long driveway and walked up his front steps.

Pam rang the doorbell, which surprised me. I looked at her about to ask why we didn't just go in, but she answered before I asked. "I told you, he's been in a very volatile mood recently. After that little episode tonight in his office, it wouldn't be wise to walk in without his permission." Too tired to respond, I nodded my head in understanding.

When the door flung open, my heart stopped in surprise at what I saw. It was Eric, but he looked like he had just gone through hell. His hair was a mess, his clothing looked out of place, his eyes were bloodshot, and it looked like he had tried to quickly clean blood from his face. Surprise then anger took over his expression at seeing me there. He glared at Pam obviously upset she hadn't given him some warning I was coming. She looked over at me with an expression that said ' _I told you he was upset_.' He tried to smooth his clothes and hair and stood straighter, attempting to look more put together.

"Master," Pam dipped her head in respect, "there have been some new developments we need to discuss."

He stepped aside and motioned for us to come in. For the second time in a few weeks, I walked into his house knowing my world was about to be flipped upside down, and wondering how in God's name I was going to keep my body from betraying my mind.

* * *

Oh my goodness! Did you guys expect any of that? I didn't lol! I kept trying to write Pam walking in the door, but Andre REALLY wanted to make an appearance and wouldn't leave me alone- he's so pesky!

Please give me some review lovin- it really does help to motivate me...and I'm sure we all want to know what's going to happen between the new roomies. I know I couldn't keep my hands off him *drools* :K


	11. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! I'm sorry it took me so long to get this up. After the past few chapters I really needed a break- then this was another hard one to get out. But, it's flowing again and Chapter 12 is already to my beta and should be up tomorrow or Sunday.

Hey everyone! I'm sorry it took me so long to get this up. After the past few chapters I really needed a break- then this was another hard one to get out. But, it's flowing again and Chapter 12 is already to my beta and should be up tomorrow or Sunday.

I also went back through every chapter and reloaded them so my beta's changes are actually accepted and it doesn't look like a bunch of typos, so sorry about that! It'll be clean from now on. =D

* * *

Walking past him into the house, a brand new flourish of emotion overtook me. It was almost too much being in his house again after what happened since I'd last been here. I was hoping to live here with him and love him for a very long time if not eternity. Being here without those promises was like a cruel slap in the face. Controlling the urge to turn and run, I forced my feet forward one at a time until I was in the sitting room. Eric and Pam walked in snapping me out of my pain-induced haze. Looking around, I noticed his house looked like a tornado had been through it. Vases and other decorations had been thrown against the wall and some of the furniture had been smashed.

' _What in the world?'_

I turned to look at Eric to ask what happened, but the look on his face said he didn't want to talk about it. Taking a seat on the somewhat pulverized couch, I listened to Pam explain what happened with Andre at my house; his face remained unchanged, but his eyes became increasingly clouded the more she talked.

"This is acceptable, although it's not an ideal situation" he glowered at me and I stared right back trying to burrow holes into him for acting like such a jerk. He focused his attention back on Pam "Why were you there though? I did not send you."

My body instantly tensed not wanting him to find out about my plans for fighting off Andre; he would undoubtedly freak.

"Sookie asked me to come." She simply answered. I was hoping he wouldn't take the conversation any further than that, so I jumped up and headed toward the guest bedrooms, extremely happy I had taken the time to explore the other day. He grabbed my shoulder to stop me as I tried to pass.

"Why did you request to see Pam?"

I should have lied, but I was too tired to make up any more stories. And if Eric ever found out what was really going on, I didn't want Pam to get in trouble on my account. "I wanted to learn how to handle a sword. Being your child, I figured she could teach me the basics." The gears in his mind began to churn as he gave me a quizzical look, still grasping my shoulder. I tore away from him and stomped down the other hallway. The light bulb must have clicked for him because a few seconds later he was in front of me with the most pained and scared expression I'd ever seen him wear, including the time he was cursed.

"Sookie, please tell me you're not considering fighting Andre by yourself?"

"What other choice do I have? I won't go with him." Horror exuded from him as he grabbed my shoulders and shook me hard.

"No! You stand no chance against him. He would be difficult for even me to kill!"

I stood on my tiptoes and looked him square in the eye, willing my voice to come out as confident and even as possible. "Vampires will not control my life anymore. I'd rather die than go with him."

He took a step back like I had just slapped him across the face and it had actually hurt. The normal veil over his eyes that kept his true emotions at bay was lifted, and I saw the deepest unbridled pain and confusion in them. It felt like I could touch his soul.

' _I can't lose her.'_ reverberated in my mind. I took a sharp breath from hearing Eric's mind for the second time in my life. He slowly stepped forward and took my hands in his, never breaking eye contact.

"Don't be irrational. Bond with me and we won't have to worry about Andre or anyone else trying to take you. Not unless they have a death wish." He smirked at me, very confident in his abilities to protect me.

"No. I refuse to bond to you only for business or safety purposes. So unless you have something to say to me, I suggest you go to your dayroom before the sun comes up." He regarded me for a moment before the veil dropped back over his eyes and he pulled away from me. The tears already started to spill before I stepped around him. Biting my tongue, I turned and asked him "I'm going to fight Andre regardless of what you tell me, so will you please allow me and Pam to continue with our plans."

He had already turned to walk away and didn't bother looking back at me. "No, I will teach you." He stated flatly before leaving me suddenly alone in the hallway. My daydream from the aerobics room flitted across my mind, and I had to tamper down the sudden surge of lust that welled up. Already knowing the layout of his house, I made my way straight to the Victorian bedroom I had already fallen in love with. It was 5:00 in the morning and the sun had just risen, so I knew I wouldn't be interrupted by any more Vampires. I quickly shed my clothes and jumped in the shower to try and relax before getting a couple hours of sleep. Unfortunately, my mind wouldn't stop creating glorious images of Eric swinging around his sword before pillaging me like the Viking he was. I would have given anything to have my Eric back just then to enjoy the shower with me.

Feeling more riled up than when I got in the shower, I chided myself for wanting something there was absolutely no way I could have. Even after my inner-self lecture, I still fell asleep dreaming that my vampire was next to me.

Keeping Vampire hours was starting to wear on me. I awoke groggily at two in the afternoon wondering how the day could have slipped by so quickly. Without hesitation, I did my morning stuff then put on a pair of my favorite jeans and a red fitted tank top that showed off just how blessed I was in the boob department. I closed my eyes and summoned the magic deep inside me. A sweet breeze blew across my face, and I opened my eyes to Hekate's shop; except, I was standing on one of the stools and quickly lost my balance, tumbling to the floor.

"Oof! That hurt." I muttered to no one in particular. Hekate's familiar chortle came from around the corner as I tried to collect myself off the ground.

"You certainly need some practice my dear. How did your talk with your fated go?" My skin crawled every time she said "fated." It was an especially touchy subject with me, especially after how he had acted last night.

As fast and emotionally detached as possible, I explained everything that happened at Fangtasia, Andre paying me a visit, and how I was now staying at Eric's house.

"He only wants to bond to me so he can keep me around to use me and I'm not going to let that happen."

"I doubt that's the only reason, little one, but if he's not ready to admit it yet, I can understand." Disbelief overtook me and I spat my next words at her. "You were here, he said himself he wasn't capable of love and I'm certain that's true. How could it not be after what happened last night?" My words were true, but his pained expression kept clouding my vision and his mind voice was replaying in my mind ' _I can't lose her_.'

She sat down next to me and smiled her crinkliest smile. "Because if he's thinking he can't loose you with that much conviction, I doubt he thinks of you as just an asset." Trepidation hit me, as I realized she, of course, had heard my inner musings.

"Please, please don't ever tell anyone I've heard a Vampire's thoughts. They would kill me! And I've only every heard Eric twice."

"Of course I won't tell anyone. Besides, when we're finished you will be able to read anyone's mind. With your Fae powers to enhance your telepathy, there is no reason you shouldn't be able to read all Vampires and Weres."

My mind reeled with that information extremely dismayed there would probably be no inner peace after going through this. Hearing everyone loud and crystal clear in my head would be awful.

"Don't worry about that, you silly child. You will also be able to keep everyone out without having to think about it. You will only hear those you choose to listen in on." Now that was downright the best news I had ever heard.

" _Really_? Let's go!" Enthusiasm spread over me, and I was eager to see all that Hekate had to teach me, especially if it meant I could have better control over hearing people's thoughts. She cackled and hopped off the bench.

"Do you see these X's on the floor?" She motioned to several white X's made out of masking tape all over her shop. I nodded in response.

"Consider this target practice. I want you to look at the X, close your eyes and visualize it, then pop to it. With practice, you should be precise and not end up standing on chairs." She winked at me. I went and stood on the first x and did as she instructed, except I landed about a foot away from the X and knocked a couple things off a shelf.

"Remove everything else from your mind. You're distracting yourself with too much worry. Solely concentrate on moving yourself to an exact location."

This time before popping myself, I took a deep, steady breathe and let my anxieties leave with the exhale. I mustered the energy needed and concentrated on my next goal the entire time. I opened my eyes to see that I was only a couple inches off the mark this time. My face could have split open I smiled so hard. I felt like a little kid who had just learned to ride their bicycle without training wheels.

"Good, now keep trying until you're exact every time." She commanded. For the next hour, I popped from X to X and was doing very well by the end; I was exhausted though.

"You're only tired because you're straining yourself so much mentally with trying to put your emotions aside. Your Fae powers won't drain you like it would a normal person who uses magic; the power is already a part of you. Go home tonight and try to relax. Work on being able to compartmentalize your emotions. You must be able to stay calm when you're fighting with Andre."

I went over and gave her a long hug. "Thank you for your help. It means so much to me, and I don't know what I'd do without you. I didn't have anyone to help with my telepathy growing up and it was really hard; it's nice to have someone here with all this new stuff."

She pulled back and gave my shoulders a reassuring squeeze. "Give your fated a chance. Without his memories, he doesn't understand what or why he's feeling what he is. Allow yourself to love him instead of being so reserved and in pain. Through what he feels from you in the bond and your actions of love, he'll be able to better understand what's happened." My heart tugged at the idea of letting myself open up to Eric again. Was she crazy? A one-way love was a torturous thing.

' _But it's always going to be one sided until you show him what he's truly lost so he can want it back'_

The truth of her words stung. She was right; I did still love him even though I'd been trying to shut it out —it already was one-sided. Perhaps showing it would get me someplace faster, but the outright rejection would be excruciating to get through.

' _You're strong, you can handle it. Now off you go! Come back tomorrow and we will work on new things!'_

I gave her one last hug and a smile before I closed my eyes and popped myself to Eric's guest room, landing on the bed. I smiled at myself for the amount of accuracy I was able to achieve in such a short period of time. I flopped back onto the bed sighing heavily.

' _Maybe she's right. All Eric's known so far is my pain and anger at him. I'm sure he's confused as to why I feel that way. I can't explain what happened, but maybe I could show him. He's been a complete asshole, but I knew this was going to be hard, even when I thought he would have the memories of our time together.'_ It dawned on me that all he really knew was that I had been making him miserable the past week. I knew it was emotional suicide to put myself out there like that, but I couldn't give up on my Vampire, not yet. I would show him what he meant to me, and if he didn't eventually return my feelings, then I'd give up for good. Although Andre may cut my time short anyways and take away the need to make that decision. I shuddered at the prospect of dying so young; I really enjoyed life.

' _I'll do it. I'll show him how much I love him.'_ I closed my eyes, shut out the pain, and let the love for Eric pour into me. Replaying all our happy times together, I held onto the idea that we could have them again. I sat up and felt much better now that I wasn't keeping my emotions bottled up. I couldn't wait for Eric to get up. Briskly, I walked to the aerobics room and looked through all the swords. I tried to pick a few of the smaller ones up, but they all seemed ridiculously heavy to me. There was a rack of miscellaneous weapons on the far side of the room that piqued my interest so I went to investigate. Most of the items I had never seen before and decided not to touch. At the end of wrack, there were two shiny daggers with extra prongs that called out to me. Carefully I picked them up liking the feel of them in my hands, they were the perfect weight. I knew I wanted to use these instead of an actual sword. As much as a weapon could, these felt right in my hands.

"They're called Tsias" Eric's voice boomed from the doorway causing me to shriek and drop them on the floor. I wheeled around to lecture him about sneaking up on people, but my jaw got stuck in the dropped position. He looked so devastatingly sexy in just his jeans and nothing else. Lust overcame me, but this time I let the love accompany it and wash over him. He closed his eyes and drifted in the sea of feelings I was sending him. When he opened his eyes, I saw the slightest glint of understanding, and a smile developed on his face. My heart melted at seeing him smile at me like that; it was peaceful.

' _I've missed that smile.'_ I thought as I sent longing to him over the bond. I wanted him to know I wanted that back. I wanted him back. Without answering my wordless plea, he came over to me and picked up the tsais. "Would you like to learn with these instead of a sword? They fit you."

"I like them. Elektra used them."

"Who?"

"A comic book character they made a lame movie out of a couple years ago. These were her weapons of choice." He took one in each hand and stood behind me crushing his body to mine. He placed an arm above both of mine and placed the tsais in my hands. Suddenly, I wanted to throw him down on the floor and have my way with him right there instead of learning anything about stupid weapons.

' _Weapons that will save your life if Eric doesn't come through for you. Now pay attention!'_

"Hold them like this," He whispered seductively in my ear as he rearranged my hands on the tsais. For the next half hour, he stood behind me like that, torturing me the whole time with his sultry voice and close proximity while giving me instructions and guiding my movements. By the time we were done though, I knew the basic maneuvers and was quite proud of myself. Breaking contact with me, he put the weapons up.

"Thank you for helping me."

"You're welcome." He came back over to me and cupped my cheek in his palm. "I hope you never have to use them though."

My pulse picked up, and I leaned my head into his hand, loving the way his skin felt on mine. "Come with me to Fangtasia tonight." Elation gurgled up at the idea of him wanting me by his side again. "We need to make an appearance together in case Andre is still watching." Of course he had to ruin the moment and turn back into Sheriff Eric. Why did he always have to do that?

"Bar! Oh my gosh! I was supposed to work tonight! I have to call Sam and let him know." It occurred to me that I was going to have to take several days off again and that I could be dead in a few weeks, so as much as it hurt, I was actually going to have to quit this time. I ran out of the room to call Sam and get away from the lustfulness in the room; the intensity was starting to choke me. Before I left though, I sent Eric as much love as I could, leaving a very dumbfounded Vampire behind.

Back in my room I called Sam.

"Merlotte's this is Sam," came his always-friendly voice over the speaker. This was not going to be fun.

"Hey Sam, it's Sookie. I'm sorry I haven't come in yet. Things have been a little crazy."

"It's alright cher, I'm just glad you're ok, I was getting worried. Everything alright?"

"No, had some trouble last night but I'm fine. Sam I'm really sorry but I need to quit. I feel just awful, but I don't know what's going to happen in the next couple weeks and I can't do that to you."

He sighed heavily. "Well I guess there's not much I can do since I don't even know what's going on. For the record, I hate those fucking vamps and how they always drag you into everything. You don't deserve this! They are uppity, viscious, . . ." He was going too far so I stopped him before he really made me mad.

"Sam, watch it. You don't know what you're talking about. I'll be fine. Eric is helping keep me safe. I'll be at his house for a while."

"Fine. You know you can always have your job back if you need it. Be careful, Sook."

"I will. Thanks for understanding." We hung up and I was actually pretty happy with how that had gone. I expected a much bigger lecture from my well-meaning friend. Sam liked poking his nose in my business too much for his own good.

There was a light tap on my door. ' _Please don't be Eric. I can't handle him right now.'_

Pam walked in without waiting for me to answer her knock. I was relieved I wasn't going to have to fight off my lustful feelings right now. I was trying to love him, but I didn't want to jump back in the sack with him until we had everything worked out.

"I'm assuming you don't have anything to wear tonight so I brought some things for you." She laid a few scandalous looking red and black leather outfits on the bed. "Why won't you bond with my Master? He's actually offered it, and now you're throwing it back in his face. Do you not want to live?" That Pam, always so blunt! Her words stunned me; of course that's not why I didn't accept.

"Yes, I want to live. I won't accept it because I just can't let vampires control my life anymore. I'm tired of feeling like I have no control over what happens to me. If I'm going to bond with someone it's going to be because we love each other and wanted it, not because we had to. "

"I would tell you that Vampires do not love, but I felt what he did while he was with you and I'm not so sure that's true anymore. His lack of ability to show his feelings is still no reason not to bond with him." She really just didn't get it so I tried to think of an example that would relate to her better.

"You and Eric have a unique relationship. I'm guessing that mostly has to do with the fact that he doesn't force you to do his bidding like Lorena did to Bill and Appius did to him. You serve him willingly because it isn't expected. I could never be with Eric because it was forced, I want him to want this as much as I do or what we could potentially have would suffer as a result."

"Oh. When you put it into that perspective I can understand your position."

"Why did he look so messed up when we got here last night, and why does his house look like a train wreck?"

She joined me on the bed before answering. "I told you he hasn't been well. He's been extremely angry he can't remember what happened and he's had a hard time dealing with all the extra emotions you've been sending him. He's also pissy he can't feed or fuck right now because you must keep up the appearance of being bonded. So in short, he's been taking his aggression out on the furniture and decorations here and at Fangtasia in fits of extreme anger." Most of what she said went over my head because I was elated that Eric hadn't been with anyone else since our time together. Thinking about him sinking his fangs into some fangbanger while cumming inside her instead of me had broken my heart several times this past week.

"Oh," was all I could say. Part of me wanted to run out the room to find him and tell him he could feed from and fuck me anytime he wanted, but Pam interrupted my scheming.

"Get dressed and meet us in the foyer in half an hour. Don't be late." She said with a warning glare as she sashayed out of the room.

The three outfits were all very scandalous. One was three-piece set of tight black leather plants, a red leather rube top, and black cutoff leather jacket. The next was simply a red bra top and red micro mini skirt, and the final outfit was a barely there black leather dress. Deciding that the dress would make me feel more comfortable than anything else, I slithered into it and matched it with the red leather thigh-high boots Pam had also brought in. I curled my hair adding as much volume as possible to make my hair poofy and voluptuous. I added on a lot more makeup than usual to complete the outfit and painted my nails red. Somehow I had managed to do that in only half an hour and quickly walked down the long hallways to the foyer. Both vampires turned to look at me when I walked in, and their fangs ran down simultaneously. I couldn't help but giggle at their mutual reaction.

"I approve," he hissed barely loud enough for me to hear. I rolled my eyes and walked past them to the door.

"Well you better be willing to keep other Vampires off me if ya'lls reactions are to count for anything. This was your idea. Remember that, and don't go killing anyone on my account."

Pam snickered and Eric looked like he was reconsidering his words of approval earlier. "You are well known as my bonded. If anyone touches you, they deserve to die and I would have every right."

I snapped around and frowned at him. "But I'm not actually your bonded so it doesn't count." I let my anger, love, and longing flow into him. He frowned back and walked past me out the door and into his corvette. "Can I ride with you? He's being too frustrating right now." Pam laughed at me as she walked by. "No. We can't have Eric arriving separately from his bonded, now can we?"

' _Ugh, she is so insufferable!'_

I stomped toward the corvette, piled inside, and slammed the door closed. If he was going to give me the silent treatment, I could play that game. The ride to Fangtasia felt like it took forever, even though with Eric driving, it was no longer than ten minutes. I wanted to be angry with him for not responding earlier and now for not talking, but my anger was fading, regardless of what I wanted. I stole a sideways glace, and my hootchie automatically did a flip and started getting warmer. One look at that man and my world turned upside down. He looked really good tonight in a black wife beater and tight leather pants. Wanting to see his backside in those pants, I was very anxious to get to Fangtasia. His lips turned up into a smirk, and I knew he had caught my ogling and felt my increasing lust through the bond. I sat back in my seat and thought about how much I really loved the man I was with. I let it swell up in me and pour out into the bond that I knew Eric could feel. He fidgeted in his seat, and vampires never fidget, so I knew he still didn't know how to react to this new development.

Eventually, we got to the club and went inside. Pam and Eric went about doing all the necessary things to open and I tried to help as much as I could. Most of the things, such as stocking the bar, were pretty much the same as at Merlotte's. My mini throne was still by Eric's, much to my delight; though I had a feeling he didn't really want it there. Visions of the night he asked me to stand by his side for all to see swam through my head. Like a fool, I accepted before he had the chance to ask me willfully as himself. Eric caught me staring at it and came over to interrupt my thoughts.

"I would give anything to know what you're remembering right now, or what would have possessed me to put that there." He was always doing that; saying something nice and then covering it up by being all business.

Deciding now might be a good time to share, I looked at him and let the feelings of that evening flow from me. "You were trying to convince me to let you in again. I didn't think I'd see you again after the night of the witch war when you were supposed to get your memories back." I paused, letting Eric sit down so he could absorb what I was saying. His eyes were wide with surprise I was finally sharing something with him. "Living with you after Mark tried to hurt me, well I had already cut myself off from you, and you weren't too happy about that; although, you were up for the challenge of making me 'yield' to you again." My lips curled up into a smile at the memory of him trailing kisses down my neck and threatening me with another steamy shower. He smirked, obviously happy with the idea he was able to win me over twice. "We came to Fangtasia after I convinced you we needed to keep up appearances for the Queen. You asked me to sit in that silly throne next to yours. But you weren't just asking me to sit with you, you were asking if I would stand by you for who you were, Vampire politics, drama, everything." My head hung as the tears started to make their appearance. The loss of everything was still so fresh, and it really stung. I was remembering why it was such a bad idea to talk about these things with him.

"Did you?" Eric's voice sliced through my silence.

Meeting his gaze with a bittersweet expression I replied, "Yes, I did." Quickly, I wiped the tears from my eyes. "That doesn't matter now, though. I'm going to go fix my makeup."

Wanting to get away from the now awkward situation, I turned toward the women's bathroom. However, before I could get away, Eric grabbed my arm and pulled me into the most romantic kiss I have ever experienced. He was extremely gentle, barely pressing his lips to mine, seeking permission. His tongue grazed my lower lip, which I opened, giving him the access he desired. Languidly, we explored each other's mouths while our hands tenderly stroked the other's back. My heart melted and was overwhelmed with love for my vampire. This was a kiss my Eric would give me. I welcomed the familiarity and the peacefulness of it. He pulled back, and I let out a small sigh; that one kiss helped ease all the pain I had been feeling in the past few days. Though I was afraid of what I would find, I opened my eyes to meet his gaze filled with love.

And then nothing. He was gone from me in Vampire speed. I sat down on a stool at the bar to let my heartbeat return to its normal pace and to figure out what in the world had just happened.

' _We just had a perfect moment and he left me standing here by myself. Is he scared of his love for me?'_

My instincts told me that he was indeed scared, but I didn't understand why. Part of me was extremely excited there was a possibility that this version of Eric could love. There was no doubt I had seen deep feelings for me in his eyes after that kiss. There wasn't anything more I could do about it that night, and it was almost opening time, so I went and rested on my throne, waiting for the boring evening to begin. The staff actually looked happy to see me, probably hoping Eric would be in a better mood. Unfortunately they couldn't have been farther from the truth because when Eric finally came out and sat with me an hour later he seemed to be in an extremely foul mood.

"What's wrong? Has something happened?"

He didn't answer me, and continued to give me the silent treatment the rest of the night. Several fangbangers approached him, trying to seek his attentions, and most of them received a quick kick to the face. In an attempt to calm him down, I sent as much peace and love toward him as I could. That was a very bad idea; he turned to me and growled.

"Would you stop doing that?" Never in my life had I truly been scared of Eric, but I was in that moment. I knew he was seriously debating whether to kill me, ignore me, or love me. Personally I was really hoping for the love me option, but I kept my opinion to myself. The rest of the night I did my best to sit still and not cry. We danced once for appearances, but I might as well of been dancing with a statue he was so cold to me.

When I thought my heart was going to break, Eric finally told me we were leaving. I nodded my understanding and almost ran out to his Corvette. All I wanted to do was get back to my bed for the evening and cry myself to sleep. Eric and I didn't talk the whole way home and he still had that stony aggravated look on his face. Stepping inside his house was upsetting and a relief at the same time.

"I'm sorry," I whispered before running to my guest room and collapsing on the bed. I did cry myself to sleep that night and had horrible dreams of Eric draining me, and I didn't wake up three days later as a Vampire either. Sometime during my night of restless sleep, I felt a cold hand stroke my cheek. A voice that seemed so far away whispered in my ear, "Sh, lover, you are safe." The touch was gone after that, but then I started to dream of what my life with Eric could be like, and the happiness engulfed me into peaceful sleep.

* * *

So what do we think? Thankyou so much for the reviews-many of your opinions inspired the Sookie and Pam heart to heart =D

Hit the green button and give me some review lovin :K


	12. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank-you all so much for the wonderful reviews! The next few chapters are going to amp things up wootwoot!

Thank-you all so much for the wonderful reviews! The next few chapters are going to amp things up wootwoot!

A big thankyou to my beta YoungBoho :)

* * *

The next day I woke up around two in the afternoon again. It seemed that my body was getting in a routine of balancing night- and daytime hours. Instinctively I touched my cheek remembering the feeling as if it were a dream.

' _Did Eric come to me last night? No, he wouldn't have done that; he was still mad at me or himself or whatever.'_

After only one day of showing my emotions to him, I felt completely beat up. My body was physically sore from all the crying and the up and down of the past twenty-four hours. I was more than ready to go see Hekate for my training. I really needed a distraction from the Vampire soap opera I was living in. Even though I was impatient to get away from the house, I still took a long hot shower to try and relax my tense muscles. Wanting to shake off some of the depression, I was precise in doing my hair and makeup, doing my best to look as fantastic as possible. Anytime I felt down or was sick I liked to try and boost my spirits by looking good on the outside. Sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't; today it was failing miserably. Regardless, I put on my best southern belle smile, closed my eyes, and popped to Hekates shop. My smile turned real as I landed exactly where one of the little white X's was the day before.

"You're getting better, little girl." Hekate shouted at me from the back. How she knew without seeing me I wasn't really sure, but I guess nothing breaking was a good clue.

"What do we get to learn today? I need to get my mind off a certain burly Viking." Her laughter warmed my insides taking the edge of my depression.

"What has he done this time?" she asked.

"I thought he might kill me last night. I told him about how he asked me to sit next to him at Fangtasia and everything he implied, then we shared the most romantic kiss of my life before he up and disappeared. Just left me standing there! Who does that? The entire rest of the night he was in a really bad mood. When I tried to send him calm and love he got even madder and told me to stop."

She came around the corner and gave me a sad smile. "I'm glad he didn't kill you. It would be such a waste not to see whatever it is you're planned for. Give him time, child. As far as he knows he hasn't felt anything like this since his human life, if ever."

Once again the old woman was right. It was starting to become annoying how good she was at pointing out the obvious.

' _I heard that'_ she sent to me with a mischievous grin. "Today we're going to learn to use the energy of your Fae powers to amplify other things; such as your telepathy." She walked over to stand in front of me. "Try to read my mind" I let down my shields and tried to listen in on Hekate, but there was nothing. Some kind of barrier stopped me before I could even reach the outer walls of her mind.

"I can't. What is that?" I asked quizzically.

"Besides my normal walls I've used magic to surround myself with protective wards. Very useful in times where enemy telepaths knock you unconscious in an attempt to lower your shields and worm their way in. They won't be able to get past the wards. However, with all that Fae magic bundled up inside you not much should stop you."

Wielding that much power was still so foreign to me, but I knew she was right. Every time I popped someplace and when we pulled things out of Mark, I felt a large amount of power inside me waiting to be let out.

"I believe you, but how do I do that?"

"The key is to concentrate until you have it down. Eventually using your magic will be like muscle memory; it'll just happen. But until then, you need to be extremely focused on what your desired outcome will be." She paused, grabbed my shoulders and looked deep in my eyes. "This is very important. Until you know what you're doing, you could hurt yourself or others." Slowly, I nodded my head in understanding. Then, as quick as the weather changes in central America, Hekate's mood switched from solemn to cheery. "Lets get started then! I want you to find the magic lying inside you and first direct it toward your own mind and telepathy. Then focus at pushing through my wards, then through my shields and into my mind. Once there, I request you not poke around too much." She smiled at me.

For a moment, I was blown back by how much trust this woman was placing in me. If I achieved what she was trying to teach me, then I could essentially have control over her. We both knew I wasn't going to do anything to her, but I had a feeling it still wasn't something she let happen often.

Closing my eyes, I reached inside myself and found that familiar ball of energy. I pulled from it, letting it fill my body and concentrating on my mind. Slowly I pushed my mind forward; I could feel the exact moment my energy hit her wards. It felt the same as running into a wall at full speed; the mental whiplash was astonishing and sent me reeling.

"Concentrate!" she scolded.

I reached deeper inside myself than ever before and supplied more energy to my telepathy. Focusing as hard as possible, I shoved myself, without reservations, into and past her wards and straight through her shields. I felt her trying to expel me, but it just felt like little pinpricks against my mind; there was no way she was going to be able to do anything about it. Not wanting to intrude, I recoiled back into myself.

"Wow! That was amazing!"

She smiled at my accomplishment and praised me "Yes, very well done. Fortunately, hearing Vampires shouldn't be that hard. Most of them don't know or care to shield themselves or their minds because there are few who can hear them. In order to listen more clearly to supernaturals all you need to do is use your power to amplify your telepathy. Try it on your Vampire tonight."

Shock clouded my features at the idea of hearing Eric's thoughts. "I'm not sure trying it out on him in particular is such a good idea."

She gave me a 'don't sass me' look before answering, "Well just try it on someone. Being able to hear and project yourself inside of a Vampire's mind is extremely important. There's even a possibility you could control a Vampire if you try hard enough." Once again, I was thoroughly surprised by the potential she thought I had. If I could control a vampire, then a fight with Andre wouldn't even be necessary.

"Alright, let's try getting through shields again."

I completed the exercise with more ease each time over the next half hour. By the time we were done, it still took a lot of concentration, but I was getting through without hesitation.

"Good work! Tomorrow we'll work on using your magic to defend yourself."

"Sounds good to me. Thanks again for helping; I'm not sure what I would have done without you." I told her as I wrapped her into a long hug.

"Of course, child, I feel lucky to be part of this historical process. Now don't forget to try listening in on other supes this evening, but make sure to keep it to yourself. It's a useful but very dangerous gift."

"Alright. I'll see you again tomorrow." Pulling on my power, I popped back to my room. That talent was easier after all the practice of focusing my energy earlier today.

It was five o'clock and I didn't want to be home when Eric rose. Figuring we'd have to go to Fangtasia again tonight, I decided to go shopping for something less awful to wear at the club. Jumping in my car, I drove to Tara's Togs to see my old friend and to find a new outfit.

When I walked in, Tara squealed from before the counter and ran over to greet me with a big hug. "Girl, where have you been? I've missed seeing your white ass around here! Don't tell me them vamps have been keeping you away!" She said with all the attitude of a feisty southern women.

"It's a long story. Everything's fine though." I said with a sincere smile. She raised her eyebrows in disbelief.

"Then why did I hear you quit Merlotte's? You loved that job."

This was why living in a small town was such a nuisance; news traveled far too fast for anybody's good. There was no way I could explain the Vampire hierarchy to her and that I may not be alive in a little over a week.

"I just needed a break, hun. I'm thinking about getting my degree and doing something with my life. Now that there's online classes it's much easier for me to get an education." It wasn't a complete lie. Going back to school was something I had seriously considered; I didn't want to be a waitress for the rest of my life.

"Well if that's the case, good for you. I always knew you were better than that!"

My cell phone started chirping in my purse, so I excused myself to get the call.

"Hello?"

"Where are you?"

"Well hello to you too, Eric. I'm at Tara's picking out something to wear tonight. The black and red leather was a little much."

"You should have told me."

"Why? Were you worried that your asset was gone. So sorry to have inconvenienced you again." I replied with bitterness in my voice.

He was silent for so long I thought he had hung up on me before he finally spoke.

"I'll see you tonight, Sookie. We leave for the club at 8:30. Please be on time."

"Sure, I love you, Eric" I said before quickly hanging up. My grin spread from ear to ear imagining the look on his face at my continued proclamations of love for him. I put the phone back in my purse and went to find Tara

She was taking care of another customer, so I went over to the racks and started to browse for something sexy yet classy to wear to Fangtasia. I picked several dresses off the rack and took them into the dressing rooms. Halfway through my choices, and not having any luck, Tara's voice sounded from the other side of the door.

"Need any help, girl? Whatcha shoppin for?"

"I'm going with Eric to Fangtasia tonight, and the outfits Pam picked for me are just too over the top. I wore a red and black leather number last night and felt stupid the whole time."

"I think I have just the thing, hang on" She left while I pulled on a red dress that made my hips look to big and my boobs too small. Huffing at my reflection, I took off yet another lost cause.

"Try this." She flung over a black and red dress that was absolutely perfect for the occasion. It was strapless, tight fitting, and had sequins all over the black top portion. From under the right breast down to the bottom of the dress, the black material cut off in a diagonal revealing a flaming red under material. The moment I had it on I was in love with the dress, my boobs poured out the top, and it fit me in all the right places.

"You sure do know me, this dress is perfect!" I yelled as I flung open the door and spun around so she could see. "Damn, girl! That dress was made for you!"

"I know! Now help me pick out some shoes." Shopping with Tara was putting me into a much better mood. Nothing can lift a girl's spirits like finding new stuff with a best friend. It was as normal as I could get these days.

"So are you seeing that Vampire now?" Wasn't that the question of the century! I wanted the answer to be yes, but it was no at the moment—kind of, because we had to say we were to cover our tracks.

"It's really complicated. You know, I'm not exactly sure what we are right now, but I do like him a lot."

"Well if he has any brains he'll be ripping this dress off you and fucking you all night long." She snickered at me, and my cheeks flushed bright red.

"Tara May! You're ridiculous!" We giggled like there wasn't a care in the world while we hunted for the perfect pair of shoes for my dress. "What about these?" She lifted up a pair of nice black heels, but they just weren't 'wow' enough.

"Nah,something flashier." Going down the just in rack I spotted them—the exact match to my dress. They had a four-inch heal and an ankle strap that was a twist of red and black material that came down the foot to meet a black jeweled strap that went over my toes. I squealed and held them up to show her.

"I found them!" She poked her head around the rack she was investigating and gave a holler of approval. I purchased the dress, shoes and a couple other things at way too much of a discount and gave my friend a long hug goodbye. On the way back to Eric's house, I let the tears fall, realizing that could be the last time I would see my childhood friend. Beating Andre was looking more likely every day, but dying at his hand was still a highly possible outcome.

By the time I got back to my room, it was already seven o'clock so I started getting ready for the evening. I took a quick shower to freshen up before reapplying my makeup for evening wear and curled me hair. Finally, I slid on the dress and put on a little perfume. Glancing at the mirror, I decided I looked hot and was excited to go tonight—even if Eric was going to be Oscar the Grouch!

Promptly at 8:30, I wandered out to the foyer to meet Eric. He looked good as always tonight in his typical Fangtasia getup. His face was stony though, so I doubted his mood was as great as his looks.

"Are you ready to go?" he asked.

' _So much for trying to impress anyone. I wonder what he's actually thinking.'_

Knowing it was wrong, but justifying it with 'Hekate said to do it!' I tried to hear Eric's thoughts. Like I practiced earlier, I felt deep inside myself and used that energy to amplify my telepathic "intake". His mental voice slammed into me and took away my breath.

' _She looks so god-damn good in that dress. I want to fuck her and bite her and make her mine. All mine! Mine. Mine. Mine!'_

I shut myself out before I could see any more of his visions about sex and blood with me. I was awestruck; he looked so controlled on the outside when his thoughts were every which way. Elation hit as I realized I could hear his thoughts crystal clear as long as I joined my Fae magic with my natural telepathy. He was staring at me like I was completely incompetent until I realized he had asked me a question. I laughed nervously trying to shrug it off.

"Yeah I'm ready, let's go."

He continued to ignore me on the way to Fangtasia, making the drive uncomfortable again. Curiosity got the better of me, so I dipped into his thoughts a couple more times on the way there.

' _Just keep ignoring her. Oh, Freya why does she have this pull on me? I can barely take being around her without wanting to either kill or claim her. How can a human girl have so much control over me. I wish I knew what happened; if I could just get my memories back maybe I would understand why. She's driving me crazy!'_

Deciding I didn't want to hear his inner debate on whether to kill or love me, I closed myself off to his thoughts. At Fangtasia I went in and got a gin and tonic before taking my dutiful spot at his side. At least tonight, he didn't' kick anyone in the face and wasn't giving me death glares anytime I felt something happy. It seemed he'd shut everyone out in order to process what was going on.

There were a lot of people out tonight, and it was wearing on my shields. People's hateful thoughts filled my mind and gave me a serious migraine. Eventually my headache was so bad I wanted to scream at everyone to just shut up already. In an act of desperation, I pulled on my Fae energy and slammed the walls back up. Silence, blissful silence, enveloped me and gave my throbbing head a break. Continually drawing on my Fae magic, I realized it was infinitely easier to keep the hundreds of voices out. _'I guess it makes sense if I can use that energy to hear better, I can use it to block people out better.'_ Mentally I kicked myself for not thinking about that sooner. The rest of the night passed by quickly, and I even had a bit of fun dancing with Pam. Several gin and tonics later, I let myself listen in on Pam without thinking.

' _She may be a load of trouble but now I can see he needs her. I really hope he gets over himself soon. She would make an excellent Vampire.'_

I pulled out of her head, not ready to think about being a Vampire in my current condition. Feeling frisky after our dance, I ran up to Eric and straddled his lap.

"What do you think you're doing?" he growled at me. In response I ground my hips into his and devoured his lips with mine, needing to be close to my Viking. He remained still but couldn't deny the rising excitement in his pants.

"You are drunk and being foolish. Stop this." I pulled back and looked at him with pouty lips. I knew he couldn't deny me outright here, not when we were supposed to look like a bonded couple.

"Can't a human kiss her bonded?" His eyes flashed with anger, and I knew I was playing a very dangerous game that I could pay for with my life later. Unfortunately, drunken Sookie didn't really care about the danger. I was starving and Eric looked like a full-course meal. I smirked at him and leaned in for another kiss. Without realizing what I was doing, I forced my mind voice into his. _'Let me in. Please just let me in for a few minutes. I miss you, lover'_

He visibly tensed before returning my kiss with burning passion. His hands were all over me, releasing the desire he had been controlling the past couple days. Slowly, I ground myself down into him while my hands wove into his hair and pulled him as close to me as possible. His shirt was in my way so I broke the kiss just long enough to pull it over his head. My hand found its way in between us down to the bulge growing in his pants; I started slowly massaging him through the clothing that was becoming a nuisance to me. I nipped his neck and sucked on the sensitive spot behind his hear. He moaned loudly and his fangs came out bringing a new wave of lust and urgency in me. Eric was about to rip off my dress when a loud coughing noise interrupted us. Wondering who could have been stupid enough to interrupt Eric and I, I turned around to glare at none other than Pam. "What?" I growled.

"Although this little show is quite entertaining, I have a feeling you would regret this in the morning. Unless you really want to have sex in front of everyone, I certainly wouldn't mind." Her fangs flashed showing just how much she would enjoy that. Coming to my senses I jumped off Eric's lap and pulled down my dress, my cheeks flushing in embarrassment. Eric seemed to snap out of the lustful trance as well because the cold look covered his features once again. He continued to not say anything to me the rest of the night while I drunkenly sat next to him on that stupid little throne I was coming to utterly despise.

On the way home from the bar there was nothing but silence again. Back at the house, he grabbed my arm and led me to the couches in the movie room.

"Explain why I heard your thoughts tonight," he asked calmly.

Now I was still a little drunk, so trying to figure out exactly what to tell him was really difficult. Eventually the truth seemed like the best idea.

"I'm able to use my Fae magic to amplify my telepathic abilities. I projected my thoughts to you."

"Can you hear my thoughts?"

"No." That time I knew lying was by far the better option. Maybe if we were bonded I could share that secret but he was already considering killing me enough, I didn't need to add reasons. Silence engulfed us, and that doesn't work well with a drunk person so I started babbling.

"You were much more fun before the curse happened, you know. You weren't as standoffish to me. I kind of thought of us as friends."

"You didn't evoke such ridiculous things in me at that time." His denial was really starting to bother me. I crawled up on his lap and looked straight in his eyes, trying to get past the walls and deep down to his soul.

"Do you really think that's true? Because if I was being honest with you, I've always felt something for you. That very first night I came to Fangtasia with Bill I wanted to be with you. Of course you wanted to fuck me, but I think there was something more. We have an unexplainable connection for whatever reason. Hekate seems think we're fated. You used to like that idea you know."

I could tell he was on overload from my little rant so I gave him a chaste kiss on the lips, jumped off him and went to my bedroom. Still feeling dizzy, I threw off my dress and jumped in bed, needing to sleep off the alcohol. _'I love you'_ I sent to him before drifting off to sleep. That night I had another dream that Eric sat down on the bed and brushed my cheek, whispering foreign words in my ear. My beautiful angel sounded so conflicted and it just wasn't right. I reached for him wanting to ease his pain.

"Eric."

"I will figure something out, lover. Give me time."

My dream dissipated leaving me to dreamless sleep the rest of the night.

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	13. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all! I'm SO SORRY it's been a while since I posted. I had this chapter done the middle of last week but when out of town and ended up not having internet so I couldn't get it up for you =( Life is calming down a little bit so I'll try to update a little more regularly. I'm hoping you're just as excited as I am to see what's going to happen next!

Hello all! I'm SO SORRY it's been a while since I posted. I had this chapter done the middle of last week but when out of town and ended up not having internet so I couldn't get it up for you =( Life is calming down a little bit so I'll try to update a little more regularly. I'm hoping you're just as excited as I am to see what's going to happen next!

As always, thank you to my amazing beta YoungBoho!

* * *

"Well I'm sorry that I don't have over a thousand years of experience wielding a weapon! I'm trying here, so stop yelling at me Mr. high and mighty!"

"You are doing this all wrong, you have to hold them like this!" Eric yelled back at me as he grabbed the tsais from my hands and showed me the proper stance again. I glared him down, doing nothing to hold back the boiling anger I felt toward him at the moment. I was exhausted from my earlier training with Hekate; we had tried telekinesis today, and it was much harder than anything I had done before.

When I came back to Eric's house, he was waiting for me to resume my weapon training since we had missed out yesterday. Apparently he had woken on the wrong side of the coffin because he was being a grouch. His ill temper was affecting me greatly; my mood was easily swayed when I was tired.

"I know how to hold them. Give them back!" My voice came out strained and I cringed at how much I sounded like a whiny child, but I didn't care. If he was going to be so obstinate, then so could I!

"Not until you calm down and stop acting like a spoiled brat." That did it. I may have agreed with him, but that didn't mean he had to be cruel enough to say the words aloud. Reflexively, I summoned my magic and threw the tsais out of his hands over to the opposite wall where they went clattering to the floor. Then I threw my hand at him, and a giant blue ball of energy flew at him, pinning him to the wall.

"Now you listen, buddy, I don't appreciate being called a child. I am a strong southern woman and expect to be treated as one. I don't know what has put you in such a pissy mood, but there's no reason to be taking it out on me!"

His face winced in pain, alerting me to the fact his skin was sizzling. Immediately, I let go of my magic to releasing Eric from my hold. He fell to the floor taking unnecessary gasps of air due to the pain I was assuming he was in. I ran to his side, deeply afraid of what I had done to him.

"Eric? Are you alright?" He slowly nodded as his skin began to heal itself.

"What was that?" He looked up and scowled at me.

"I'm so sorry. I've never done that before. Hekate told me to be careful 'cause something like this could happen. Oh my gosh, I'm so, so sorry."

Now perfectly healed, he stood up and stared at me. "Exactly what can you do?"

Fear stole my heart at his possible reaction to the extent of my powers. I didn't want to tell him, but it seemed I really didn't actually have an option. Judging by what I had just done to him, I could protect myself if he wasn't happy about my answer. "I can project my thoughts, shut people out better, pop from place to place, control objects and call them to me, and apparently, I can use my energy as a weapon."

"And is there more for you to learn?"

"Hekate is going to teach me how to increase my strength with the tsais and how to use my power to create a shield around myself."

"And with all that power, you can't use your energy to hear thoughts better as well?"

' _Oh shit. What am I supposed to say? Of course that doesn't make sense.'_

"Um, well, maybe that's a possibility, but, uh—" He grabbed me and shoved me back against the nearest wall, baring his fangs.

"Can. You. Hear. _Me_?"

This was it. He was going to kill me now. Was I going to have to take out the entire Vampire populace in order to be safe and have a normal life?

I hung my head and responded as meek as a mouse. "Only when I want to." His head rolled back and he let out an animalistic roar. Not wanting to find out what his next move was, I popped to my guest bedroom. The pounding of my heart echoed loud in my ears, unsure of how Eric was going to proceed. There was a reason I had never told him about 'hearing' him; I knew it would result in death. A small part of me desired he would except me for what I was and just kindly ask me to stay out of his head. I would even teach him how to block me if it would make him feel better. Alas, I was dealing with a Viking Vampire and I doubted he would give me the opportunity to speak before trying to kill me or barging out of the room after my shields kept him from doing so. My heart pricked with sadness upon the realization of how far apart we truly were compared to when he was under his curse. I never would have been worried about my Eric killing me for this. After a few seconds alone in my thoughts, the door flew open,I put my hands out in front of me putting up an energy barrier to whatever was coming for me. Eric suddenly appeared before me. His eyes were full of rage and, and . . . hurt?

"I'm not going to kill you. Do you really think so little of me?"

His words caught me off guard. I _was_ expecting him to kill me, but somehow that wasn't his plan. Maybe there really was more of my Eric in him than I thought.

"I'm sorry, but I know Vampires are so private and I assumed you wouldn't be able to accept that information without wanting me dead."

"How could you think I would want to kill you? After all I've gone through to keep you safe! Do you not realize that my actions toward you are not normal? I would have killed anyone who dared talk to me the way you've done on so many occasions!"

"I know you could kill me because you've been considering it for the past three days. Ignore me, care for me, or kill me. Those are your options, right?"

He stopped pacing and stared at me. "You've been listening to me?"

I cringed at the look of distrust and hurt on his face. "Only twice. At first it was just to see if I could do it. The second time was because you were blowing me off, and I had to know what you were thinking. Trust me, I don't want to know what you're thinking. That's why I find Vampires so peaceful; I couldn't hear your thoughts, and I don't want to now!"

"Could you stop glowing?" Not really sure if I should trust him or not, I went ahead and released my magic, letting the barrierfall. He stalked over to me and held my hands.

"I _should_ kill you. You are nothing but trouble and make me look weak. However, just the thought of it makes me ache. I'm not sure what I feel, but I do have some sort of attachment to you."

"Would you happen to call that attachment love?" His brow crinkled, and he took a step back from me.

"I've told you, Vampires do not love." I sighed in frustration at this stupid man. If I ended up dying because he couldn't buck up and admit his feelings, then I was going to be mad. Rolling my eyes, I turned and sat down on the bed.

"And I've told you that I won't bond with you out of convenience."

"You would rather suffer at the hands of Andre than be bonded to me?" Stepping closer, he peered down at me. How was I supposed to make him understand if he didn't have any memories of what happened?

"No. I . . . it's just, you don't understand. You did love me when you were cursed. I know that wasn't entirely you, but you made me believe that is was a part of you. I didn't believe you at first, but some of the things you would say or do were very much like the real you. So, I figured that if parts of bad-ass Sheriff Eric could come through when you were cursed, why couldn't the softer side come through when you were normal? I simply can't settle. Not when I know what we had; I'm not willing to give that up for a simple 'I care for you.' That's not good enough."

He picked up the nearest object, which happened to be a very pretty vase, and chucked it across the room. Not wanting to see it broken, I called it to me and gingerly set it on the bed. "You're not going to have a house left if you keep throwing things around like that."

"I have other houses," he spat at me. "What I don't have more of is you, and yet you still insist on this stupid idea of fighting off Andre. Have you thought about what will happen after that? Do you really think the Queen will let you get away with killing her favorite pet?"

To be honest, I hadn't thought of that. I was trying to take on one Vampire at a time, and right now, I had two to deal with, so I was already on overload. I sighed, feeling like I was losing control again. All I wanted was a little bit of a say over what happened in my life, and it was constantly being ripped away from me.

"I don't know what I'm going to do. Maybe I'll just put a shield around the whole town of Bon Temps! But I need to feel like I have some control over my own life. Otherwise I might as well give myself over to Andre and be done with it."

"I don't understand why you won't just give yourself over to me."

"Because, a bond made out of necessity or business will only bring about hatred and bitterness and that's just not something I could stand between us. I love you." Opening my heart, I let my love for him flow into our minimal bond. Our bond may not be complete yet, and I may not be able to feel hardly anything from him, but I know he can feel me loud and clear. .

"What is that feeling you keep overwhelming me with? It's not something I've ever felt from you before."

"That would be love, feel familiar?" I asked with hope resounding in my voice.

Confusion, fear, apprehension, and shock all crossed his features before he answered me. "Like I've told you—"

"Yeah, yeah Vampires don't love. I get it. I feel like we're just running around in circles with this talk, so how about we both get ready to go to Fangtasia and act like a happy bonded couple, okay?"

A curt nod of his head was his only response. At the doorway, he turned around and gave me a stern glare. "Don't lie to me again." Well who did he think he was to tell me not to lie to him!

"Like you don't lie to me."

His eyes turned sorrowful and hurt again. "No, I don't," he said as he walked out of the room.

While I was getting ready for the evening, I pondered what Eric had said. Replaying many of our times together, I couldn't remember one time where he had lied to me; minus sucking the bullet out in Dallas, and even after that he had confessed everything to me, not trying to hide his motivations.

' _He was hurt that I lied to him.'_ Knowing I had caused him pain upset me. On the other hand, though, I really didn't know how he was going to react. I thought I knew him, but Vampires were constantly surprising me with how crafty they could be, and his moods were extremely volatile at the moment. From our time together when he was cursed, I knew a lot more about him and his human life, which gave me a little comfort.

Done with moping for the evening, I grabbed my purse and went to meet Eric for our nightly trip to Fangtasia.

"You look beautiful," he said as he took in my outfit for the evening—a knee-length red silk dress with spaghetti straps and a silk belt that sat underneath my breasts and tied in a bow on my back. To accent it, I wore a black sparkly earring and necklace set and black wrap-around heels.

"Thank you. You look rather nice yourself." He really did look good in a pair of tight dress slacks and a blood-red button up shirt. I'd say it was funny we matched, but since I was wearing his favorite color, it wasn't too surprising. Grabbing my hand, he led us out the door. For some reason I couldn't contain the giddiness; I was like a teenager out on her first date.

Fangtasia was boring as usual, but some of the tension between Eric and I had been released, and it felt really good to have the air between us a little clearer. I was beginning to think I was pushing my feelings at him a little too hard, but maybe that's what he needed. Throwing him against the wall this morning wasn't ideal, but I think it also showed him I could take care of myself and going against Andre wasn't certain death.

Scanning the crowd with my gift, I pointed out a couple underage girls to Eric, and he had Pam throw them out. Deciding to include Vampires in my scan I amped up my gifts with my Fae power. Darkness as thick as molasses covered me, and I thought I was going to drown. For the most part, Vampires were thinking about violence, blood, and sex. I flung them from my mind and put my shields in place as quick as possible. Wondering if that was really all there was to a Vampire, I selected a random Vampire sitting in the shadows to "read." Delving into his mind, I found the same dark thoughts slithering around like snakes. Pushing deeper, I felt a small sliver of light and hope, but it was buried under so much filth, I couldn't reach it. I opened my eyes to see the strange Vampire staring at me, boring holes in my soul.

' _Oh shoot, does he know what I was doing?'_

Fangs tearing into my shoulder answered my question. I screamed in pain and horror at being attacked. I didn't know what to do, using my abilities would expose myself to far too many vampires, but I couldn't let him kill me. Ending my debate, Eric flew from across the room and tore the Vampire off me. He tried to tear into Eric, but he wasn't strong enough and was soon flung to the floor.

"Explain yourself before I end you." As awful as I should have felt at someone's life ending, I couldn't have been more proud of how my Vampire was defending me.

"She knows why." He glared at me, and I was extremely thankful he didn't tell my secret to everyone. Worry began to encompass me as I realized Eric was going to kill yet another Vampire for me. If I was actually his bonded I doubt it would be a problem, but when the truth came out, this wasn't going to bode well for him.

' _Eric, we're not actually bonded so you have no right to kill him. When the truth comes out I don't want you getting into trouble. Think carefully.'_ I projected to him.

' _He hurt you. He deserves to die.'_ He thought at me.

' _Maybe so, but it was my fault. I was scanning the crowd and listened in on him. Somehow he knew.'_

' _All the more reason to want him dead.'_

' _Let's just take him to your office so we can talk about some things, and then if you do kill him, it won't be in front of hundreds of witnesses. Besides, I'm bleeding, and I don't like the look every vamp in here is giving me.'_

Some of the bloodlust left his eyes, and he bobbed his head in agreement. With the power of his thousand years, he picked the Vampire off the floor and dragged him to his office. All the customers looked sorely disappointed that they weren't going to see Eric rip another Vampire to shreds.

In the office, Eric flung him onto his couch. "Why are you here, Marco? You have not checked in with me as this area's sheriff and now you've attacked my bonded in plain sight of me." A hateful glare is all he got in response, so I lowered my shields and dove into his mind. This time he attempted to keep me out, but after all my practice, his weak shields were no match for my Fae powers.

His eyes went wide with surprise and fear. "You are not human."

"Not entirely," I smirked at him. Closing my eyes, I did my best to focus on his thoughts. Human minds often wandered, but that was nothing in comparison to trying to sort through Vampire thoughts. Theirs weren't muddled or confused; on the contrary, they were very organized and precise. The problem was that they were able to think clearly about several things at once, making it hard to concentrate and pull on one thing specifically. It didn't help that the hole he had torn in my shoulder was throbbing with pain and distracting me. I saw several memories of Eric and Marco hunting together in what looked like an entirely different world. Judging by the clothes people were wearing, I guessed it was sometime in the 1920s. The next scene played out like a movie before my eyes; after some time together, Marco had told Eric he wasn't going to kill anymore. When Eric confronted him about it, he found out it was because he was in love with a human girl. Eric had laughed at him and told him Vampires don't love. (No surprise there, I was beginning to think it was his favorite line.) The next scene was a fight between Eric and Marco. Without realizing it, Eric had hunted and fed off of Marco's human and had glamoured away all memories of any Vampires, including Marco. She was terrified of him now and refused to see him, knowing there was something off about him. Marco swore to Eric that he would repay him someday for the pain he had bestowed on him. Eric had tried to kill him then, but Marco ran away before he had a chance.

"Did you like what you saw little girl?" he asked in a maniacal voice. Obviously the care and compassion he had felt for his human left when she denied him because there was nothing sweet about the way Marco was looking at me. I looked at Eric and surprisingly saw a glint of satisfaction in his, as if he already knew the answer to the question he asked.

' _I knew he would come. He's been plotting his revenge for years and I knew taking a human for my own would be… how do you humans put it? Oh yes, the icing on the cake. I was hoping to use this as a cover for why I needed to lie about being bonded to you. I didn't expect this so soon though. I'm going to have to report this to the Queen immediately and that will leave you vulnerable to Andre._

"It's fine, I'm going to have to fight him eventually anyways." Eric gave me a pained looked but wasn't going to talk about it in front of Marco.

"I am going to have to killhim. He attacked me after you, so I will be justified."

Marco's face lit up in understanding that he was meant to be here and Eric had been expecting him. His body shook in rage at being used as a pawn in our very dangerous game.

"I don't want to watch. I'll meet you at home okay?"

He pierced a finger and rubbed his blood over the wound on my shoulder. "Thank you."

Giving me his heart-stopping smile, he turned and walked out the office door, dragging Marco behind him. Marco had kept his mouth shut, silently fuming at his situation. By this time tomorrow night, the Queen and Andre would know I wasn't truly under Eric's protection. I felt scared and anxious and just ready to get it over with. For the most part, I was ready, though. I could pin him against a wall and slice off his head, my mouth turned into a satisfied grin at that idea.

Back home, I went to the sword room and practiced with my tsais. A couple hours and several buckets of sweat later, Eric stood in the doorway watching me move.

"You're getting better," he noted.

"I don't plan on using them except to chop off his head. It's still nice to know how to use them, though."

He took several steps toward me wrestling with what he wanted to say. "Please don't do this. I won't be able to protect you from them if you kill him. Bond with me." Conviction filled his voice, but his pleas were starting to upset me more and more each time. I'd done all that I could to explain to him why I couldn't bond to him just because of our situation.

"I don't know how else I can explain it to you. I've told you several times that I refuse to do this unless you feel the same about me as I feel about you."

"I have to call and tell the Queen by tomorrow night. Let me know when you change your mind."

Anger rose in me at the assumption I'd give into his plans. "Let me know when you change yours." He smirked and walked out.

The next morning I woke up really early feeling extremely excited and nervous for the events I knew the night would bring. I felt ready but knew I could be more prepared so I quickly got dressed and popped myself to Hekate's. She was sitting on a stool, leaning over the counter doing paperwork of some sort. I walked up to the other stool beside her and took a seat.

"Today's the day. Eric's cover for us has been blown, so he has to call the Queen tonight and let her know. I'm going to have to fight him," I told her.

"Your fated still hasn't admitted his feelings to you?" she asked without looking up from the papers.

"No. He says he cares for me but Vampires don't love according to him. He seems to think that I'll give into him and bond without him loving me." Her tongue tsk tsk'd and she looked up at me.

"He's just about as stubborn as you are, isn't he?"

"Yes he is and it's infuriating! We were practicing with the tsais yesterday, and I got so mad, I threw them out of his hands and pinned him against the wall with my magic. His skin starting sizzling, though, and I was really scared I had hurt him." A frown covered her normally cheery face and she spoke to me like a mother scolding her child would. "I warned you about that. You have to be careful when releasing your magic without a concentrated outcome. You're lucky you didn't kill him."

"I know, I'm sorry. I just got so angry." Hekate's fist slammed down on the counter and she yelled at me. "You must never let your anger affect your magic. You have to be in control at all times."

Tears stung my eyes at her harsh reprimand. I didn't expect her to react this way, and I didn't think I could handle being punished like this when I had so much more to concentrate on.

"I'm sorry, dear. I've experienced first-hand what out-of-control magic can look like, and I don't want you to have to experience that pain."

She had never really opened up to me about her past, so I took the opportunity to learn more about this interesting woman. Gently, I squeezed her shoulder, hoping to ease the pain in her eyes.

"What happened?"

"My father accidently killed my mother in a fit of rage. He was a fire demon. She burned alive. My father was never the same after that and killed himself a year later. I was thirteen at the time and just coming into magic. I was adopted by a couple that was both half demons and had known my mother. They raised me in the practice and helped me develop my telepathy. I'll never forget that day, though. Magic of any form should never be misused or performed carelessly." Wiping the tears from her wrinkled eyes, she lifted her head to smile at me.

"Enough of being sad, lets learn to shield yourself today."My heart broke for the sad circumstances of Hekate's life. I was surprised she was even willing to practice magic after what had happened to her family. She was one tough little bird. I wanted to ask more about her life growing up but didn't want to cause any more grief.

"Sounds good to me. Do you think my training will be complete after that?"

"You will know the basics of what your abilities entail; however, my guess is that you'll be able to do a lot of other minute things as your power develops. Once you become bonded to your fated, it's likely that you will become even more powerful."

Not sure if I should ask the question, or why I was even thinking it, I spurted out, "What if I become a Vampire? Will I still have these abilities?" She didn't look surprised at my question and just gave me a knowing grin.

"That I don't know. As far as I know, there's never been someone part Fae and fated that's become a Vampire. If you choose that path, it will certainly be interesting to see the outcome." Mulling that over, I jumped off the stool and moved to the middle of the shop, giving myself some space to use my magic.

"I know you've used your energy to block people from coming at you, but you can use it to create a shield all the way around you at all times. This will be very helpful in dealing with a Vampire because you may not be able to pop out of the way in time; they move too fast for our eyes to see. In order to do this, gather your magic and imagine it enveloping you like an egg covering a baby chick."

Closing my eyes, I followed her instructions. Finding and using my magic was becoming less difficult every day, and this was no exception. I took it and funneled it out around me, letting it cover my skin. I opened my eyes and gasped; I was glowing a faint blue color.

"I look like a firework on the Fourth of July!"

We both giggled before refocusing on the task at hand. "Very good, my dear. You're getting much better at channeling your abilities. You can do a lot with that magic inside you. You just have to know how to direct it. Like I've been telling you, there are probably limitless possibilities of what you can do. Knowing how to guide your energy is the key."

I nodded in understanding, still in awe of the faint glow I carried. "Now that you have an understanding of your most important abilities, you need to practice using several of them at once. Your shield will need to be up constantly, so relax and let your magic freely flow out into it. Trust that as long as you will it to, the magic will continue feeding it without having to try. Now try popping around the room and call something to you while keeping your shields up the whole time."

Trying to do all three things at once was ridiculously hard. I kept dropping the thing I was calling, or would fall into shelves, or my shield would drop. Tears started falling as I could see Andre getting the best of me if this was all I could do.

"You're overthinking all of this child. You know you can do these things. Stop trying to force it all to happen and just will it to. Take a deep breath and try again."

Letting go of my fears and frustrations, I let the energy bubble up out of me, giving it subtle direction by desiring the outcome. Before I knew it, I had popped all over the room, called several things to me and sent them back, and kept my shield up the whole time. Giddy with the excitement of success I ran over to Hekate and gave her a huge hug jumping up and down.

"I did it! You were right, it was so much easier when I just let go of everything and let the magic do the work on its own."

"Very good, dear, I'm so proud of you." She returned my hug with equal vigor crushing me with her strong grip.

"Do you think I'm ready to face him now?"

"You are more than capable of killing a Vampire. Be cautious, though, you never know if a Vampire has had training or can detect you like the man last night. If something you do fails, or Andre overcomes it, don't worry. You have plenty more options at your disposal. Your shield will protect you regardless of what happens."

Fear and a solemn mood stole my heart. "I'm still scared. I don't want to die or anyone I love to get hurt."

Understanding and compassion filled her eyes as she held my hands. "Have faith in yourself, child. You will succeed. You must believe that."

"What about after he's dead, though? He's not the only Vampire after me, and it's not going to stop the Queen from getting to me. I'm doing this to have more control of my life, but I feel like I'm losing more and more control every day." A sigh of frustration escaped my lips.

"The next few months may be difficult for you, but I have no doubt you will succeed. You and Northman are meant for something important; fate won't let you fail so easily."

If I believed in being fated and destined for something, her words would have comforted me more than they did. Without confidence, I knew I was more vulnerable, though, so I put away my fears and gave her my biggest smile.

"I can do this!" I said to myself more than to Hekate. "Thank you for all your help these past couple of days. Your training has made me accept what and who I am and has given me the ability to try and keep my life as I want it. Thank you."

"You're welcome, my dear. Please come back any time. It's good to have a youngster around every once and a while."

"I'll come by tomorrow if I can to let you know how everything went." With one last squeeze, I said goodbye and popped back to my room. Tonight was the night. After all the heartache, training, and hard work of the past couple days, I was ready to fight Andre. Bring it on.

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DUN DUN DUN! So what do you guys think is going to happen? Will she fight Andre or will Eric finally give into his feelings? Review= writing encouragment= faster updates :K


	14. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here it is guys- THE chapter! I'm ridiculously excited to hear all of your responses to it. I'm pretty sure it will make everyone happy but there's a twist no one has guessed yet =D I'm going to be exhausted at work tomorrow but I had to get it out to you guys cus I'm just so damn excited lol This has by far been my favorite chapter to write so far.

So here it is guys- THE chapter! I'm ridiculously excited to hear all of your responses to it. I'm pretty sure it will make everyone happy but there's a twist no one has guessed yet =D I'm going to be exhausted at work tomorrow but I had to get it out to you guys cus I'm just so damn excited lol This has by far been my favorite chapter to write so far.

A HUGE thank you to my beta, YoungBoho, who gave several great suggestions that made this chapter so much deeper and more amazing. Also thank you to all of my readers. I noticed the other day I've got over 100 reviews which just blows my mind. They really have been what's kept me writing this story- you all are fantastic! Much love to you :K

Without further ado, Chapter 14:

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I was sitting at Eric's kitchen table, eating what could quite literally be my last meal, when he walked in the room. My heart started racing and my hands began to shake as I realized that if he were up, then he'd probably already called the Queen and confessed we weren't really bonded. Slowly, I raised my gaze to meet his.

"Have you talked to the Queen?" I asked in a trembling voice.

He joined me at the table with a warmed True Blood before answering. "Yes. I have spoken with her."

Tears sprang to my eyes, but I fought to hold them back. In my heart, I had truly believed that he wouldn't turn me over to Andre. Naively, I had thought that the idea of losing me would make him admit his feelings, and we would bond out of love and live happily ever after. I had to stop thinking that my life was someday going to turn into a fairy tale with a happy ending; apparently that wasn't in the cards for me.

Being around Eric was the last thing I wanted in that moment, so I threw my dishes in the sink and traipsed off to my bedroom to try and calm down before Andre surely came knocking on Eric's door for me. In the back of my mind, I could hear Gran scolding me for not putting my dishes away like a good-mannered girl, but I shrugged it off. While I should have been exceedingly worried about the impending battle for my life, instead I was thinking about how much I was beginning to despise Eric. It was one of those kind of hurts that runs so deep the only thing you can do to survive is to turn some of it into anger . . .really intense, burning anger. After what we had gone through with him being cursed and living together these past few days, I couldn't believe he was okay with my possible death. All he had to do was get over his pride, and I could—and would—be his for eternity. I started crying even harder when the irony of it all occurred to me. Only a few months ago, Eric was relentlessly pursing me, and now I was trying to pursue and woo him to no avail.

My tears continued to fall until I felt like there were no more tears left in me to cry. All I wanted was for everything to be alright. No. All I wanted was for Eric and I to be together and that would make everything alright. My mind continued to berate me with images of my life, especially Eric and my time together, taunting me with what I was likely to lose tonight. Whether I killed Andre or not, my life was probably not going to be the same. I've gone into several situations knowing my life wouldn't be the same, but this was different; this was going to completely take away life as I knew it and replace it with something else, not just change a part of who I was. Absentmindedly I started rubbing the pendant Hekate had given me; it had become a nervous habit to fiddle with it when I was nervous or upset.

A slight rap on my door interrupted my doomsday thoughts. "Who is it?" I managed to choke out through a dry throat and stuffed up nose.

"Who else would it be in my house?" came Eric's irritated voice. I rolled my eyes at his constant smug tone. He was the last person I wanted to see right now considering he was pretty much the cause of my grief.

"What do you want?" There was silence for several seconds before he replied in a much softer tone. "You felt very upset. I wanted to make sure you were alright." His words started a fire in my toes that crept up my legs, into my stomach, up my breast, and into my head. I popped to outside of the room and screamed in his face.

"Why in the world would you care about what's happening to me? In only a couple hours Andre will be here to take me away. And you know what he's going to do if I fail right?" I cocked my head to the side, mocking him with my question he already knew the answer to. That didn't stop me from continuing my rant. "He's going to starve me." I poked him in chest for increased effect.

"Rape me."

Poke.

"Beat me."

Poke.

"And force me to take his blood."

Poke. Poke. Poke.

"And you expect me to think that you care for me? If you cared for me or loved me you wouldn't let this even be a possibility!"

"I've told you multiple times, woman, that I will bond with you."

My eyes narrowed, and I gritted my teeth trying to keep my magic under control. My body was already glowing a faint blue, and I didn't want to do anything stupid like Hekate's father. "Being forced into a bond with you out of survival is no better than being forced to bond with Andre!" I spat at him. Fury rolled through his features and up into his eyes. He started to lunge for me, but I put my shields up before he could actually hurt me, if that was his intention. I cringed as I watched him bounce off my shield and into the nearest wall. Needless to say, he left a large dent adding to the list of repairs needing to be done.

Pulling himself out of the debris, he brushed pieces of drywall off his shirt. He came and stood in front of me gazing deep into my eyes. His own were clouded with so many feelings I couldn't figure out what he was feeling or trying to communicate to me. Feeling kind of guilty for prying, I let down my mental shields and started reading his mind.

' _I want to pull her apart limb from limb for being so ignorant and stubborn. Does she really think I'm like that poor excuse for a Vampire? I feel so much pain in my body and I don't understand why. I don't understand why I feel so damn out of control around her. What am I supposed to do?'_

Before he abruptly left in Vampire speed, I caught a single red tear forming in his eye. What I heard and saw left me feeling so confused. If he really cared for me, then why couldn't he just admit it? I'd done everything I could to show him I loved him, hoping he would recognize the feeling. His thoughts were so tormented it made my heart break. All I had wanted to do was vent my anger, but Eric had stolen my rage and replaced it with compassion.

' _Damn him!'_

The tears I thought I didn't have started raining down my cheeks. Regardless of how I felt for Eric and even if he did feel the same, it was too late. Andre was probably closing in on Eric's house by the minute. Preparing myself for the coming battle was all I could afford to think of for the rest of the evening, so I quietly went and changed into a pair of sweats that would allow me to move easily. For the millionth time, I checked the nightstand to make sure all the letters I had written to my loved ones saying goodbye were still there. I had spent all afternoon writing them to Sam, Jason, Tara, Pam, and Eric. The one to Eric was by far the hardest to write, but I wanted to let him know I loved him regardless of what had happened, and although I didn't think he would, I didn't want him to blame my possible death or capture on himself.

Feeling as prepared as I could be, I went to the aerobics room and picked up my tsais. I swung them around the room in an almost tranquil state. The peacefulness of doing something familiar and powerful washed over me, calming my anxieties and fear. Regardless of what would happen should I beat Andre, I had confidence in my Fae abilities to get me through this battle; the war could wait for later. Around ten, I heard the front door slam shut; Eric must have left for Fangtasia, which left me here by myself. My assumption was that Eric didn't want to be with me when Andre came so he couldn't get into trouble for not helping to subdue me.

Every minute after he left was more excruciating than the last. I felt like someone sitting on train tracks and watching their death come hurdling towards them but not getting out of the way. In order to keep my nerves from building, I kept practicing with my tsais, expelling the excess energy. Several hours later, I began to wonder what was going on.

' _Perhaps they changed their minds?'_ my heart dared to hope. _'No, that's absurd. From what Andre said, they've been after me for quite some time. Why aren't they here?'_ I strapped the tsais to my waist and started pacing around the house looking through all windows to try and spot anything. More hours ticked by, putting me into a near frenzy. Just before dawn, the door opened and I hopped off the sitting room couch to confront my enemy, except it was only Eric who walked through the door. I felt thoroughly confused as he silently passed me and went into the kitchen.

Dawn came and still no Andre, so I decided to get some sleep. My mind wouldn't rest, though. It was trying to figure out why he hadn't come for me yet. I decided maybe they had things they had to accomplish before they came and got me. Regardless, I was going to have to be ready to fight at any moment.

The next couple days came and went much like that day Eric talked to the Queen. Andre hadn't made an appearance yet, which was making me more and more upset. I started solely keeping Vampire hours so I was never taken off guard. Eric continued to try and convince me to bond with him, always ending the argument with "Let me know when you change your mind." He was infuriating me with his stubbornness and lack of concern for my well being or my feelings. Everyday his mood became more sour, and other than his cold pleas for me to bond with him, we didn't talk at all. Although I didn't really need it, I continued to see Hekate everyday for her support and guidance.

"I just don't understand why they haven't come for me," I told her after five days of waiting.

"My dear, when you're immortal, time isn't nearly as rushed like it is for us. With the story Eric gave them they probably think you're safe under his care until it's convenient for them to come get you. It could be years before they come for you, unless they need your gift for something, of course."

My stomach lurched at the thought of having to wait even another day for this battle with Andre . "I can't look over my shoulder for the next couple of years waiting for something to happen! This is insane! I'm ready to storm the Queen's castle and end them all."

Hekate raised an eyebrow at me quizzically. "While I don't doubt you could manage yourself, that wouldn't be the wisest course of action and you know it."

My chest heaved with a loud sigh; she was right as usual. "What am I supposed to do?"

"Continue to practice your magic and work on that dead heart of your fated." I glared at her ferociously while shouting into her head, _'You know not to bring him up. He insults me every night with his lame attempts to get me to bond with him.'_

"Have you ever thought he's asking you to bond out of love, he just can't admit it to himself?"

Sadness flooded my heart as I told her, "Yes, I have. But if losing me isn't enough to get him to admit his true feelings, why should I expect him to eventually come around after we're bonded? That doesn't make sense."

"It's likely he could get his memories back after bonding with you."

"I'd rather he didn't at this point. I want the real him, all of him, to want to love me without having all that thrown in. The reason he loves me is because of the curse and that hurts in and of itself. I want him to fall in love with me all over again, just as he is. I want to know this could have happened without the curse."

Her forehead became a wrinkled mess as she gave me a deep frown. "I would tell you that you're being silly, but I can see your logic and it's important you both go into the bond willingly. Let's hope he comes around sometime soon then." I gave her another dirty look before apologizing for my rude behavior; it was just so easy to be candid around her.

When I popped back from Hekate's, Eric was waiting for me on my bed. He looked like a person does when they haven't slept well and have something very troublesome on their mind.

"Would you sit with me?" We hadn't really been talking the past couple days and I thought I'd throw up if he tried to convince me to bond with him one more time. I threw my purse on the nightstand and plopped down on the bed.

"What do you want?" I said a little more snippy than I should have.

He pulled me close to him locked his arms around me. "Please bond with me. " The fury that is my temper started to roll, but something in his eyes held me back. He looked like he meant it this time.

"Why? Why do you want to bond with me."

"Because I can't let Andre take you away, you're too important. Stay with me."

"Do you love me?"

He was quiet for a long time, debating with himself. "I've told you, Vampires don't love, but I do feel so strongly for you. Never in my long existence have I felt drawn to a human before you. You captivate me. Bond with me."

My mind was spinning, trying to figure out a response. Could I take this from him? The look of his eyes, the tone of his voice, all of it pointed to the fact that he did love me. But what was love if it was constrained and never admitted. I knew he had to be the bad-ass sheriff in front of everyone, but I wanted him to love me like no other could when we were in private.

Much nicer than the past few days, I explained to him why I couldn't accept his offer. "I want to be with a man who loves me more than anything else. I deserve that. I know the fact that you feel something for me is astonishing to you, but it's not enough for me. I would like to think that if we had time. maybe you could eventually love me, but I suppose we'll probably never find out. Besides, I've told you before, it would only get you in trouble with the Queen."

"Why do you have to be so stubborn? Humans! You are such annoying, impossible creatures."

"And you Vampires are nothing but blood-sucking monsters! Get out of my room!" He left while I sat down on the bed trying to figure out what had just happened. I heard the front door slam and his car zoom down the driveway. Somehow any conversation having to do with our feelings ended in a colossal argument. It was moments like this that really made me want to move back home and get away from everything. Eric had told me that wasn't possible, though. Loving Eric made me want to be around him, even if I was extremely angry at him, and that was the only thing making me not feel like a prisoner. He didn't say I couldn't go back home because the Queen was making him watch me, but I was only assuming there was no other reason he could possibly want me here with him. In retrospect, I should have remembered that to assume is only to make an ass out of u and me. He certainly didn't act like he liked having me around. I had barely saw him the past couple of days and when I did he tried to pretend I wasn't around. He was constantly confusing me with his stand off presence contradicted by a deep longing and concern in his was the reason. Mostly I kept to myself reading in the library.

Needing to burn of some of my anger and confusion I practiced with my tsais for an hour. After that I had a good soak in the tub before grabbing a book from the library and cuddling up on a big loveseat. Several hours later, I was losing myself in the story of Rhett and Scarlet, when I felt a Vampire presence downstairs. I listened in only to discover it was Pam. I hadn't seen her in several days, as she usually didn't come to Eric's house; however, he probably forgot something and sent her to pick it up. She burst into the library thoroughly annoying me.

Once I'm lost in a good book, I really hate interruptions from the outside world, it completely ruins the setting. Frustrated, I looked up at her finding a very panicked and scared Pam. And that's not Pam's style. She simply doesn't do scared. Well, Vampires in general don't ever look panicked or scared.

"Sookie, what are you doing here? How could you let this happen?" she screamed at me while waving a piece of paper around in the air like a maniac.

"Let what happen, what are you talking about?"

She shoved the piece of paper at me before explaining. "Eric's left! Tonight is the night you two were supposed to prove your bond. I was under the impression you two had finally made up and were bonded. But that letter tells me to watch over Fangtasia because he went to tell the Queen you two aren't bonded and to accept punishment for not revealing it earlier."

To say I was surprised and confused would have been an understatement. "I don't understand. He called the Queen the night after he killed Marco, he told me so."

"What exactly did he tell you?"

"I asked him if he had spoken to the Queen, and he said yes."

"Well, if he spoke to her, it was only to confirm your appointment to prove your bond. If she knew about Marco and your lack of bond, then Andre would have been here that night."

My brain was having issues processing what she said. "I'm confused. Why would he do that?"

She looked at me like I was stupid. "Why do you think Sookie? Because he loves you. He may not have said the words, but doesn't this prove to you what he's feeling?"

"No! No, he's been nothing but arrogant and snarky to me while I've been here. The past couple of days have been awful. He kept saying I was too important to lose like I was an asset. He said he cared, but that isn't enough for me to commit my life to. I thought he had betrayed me to the Queen for heaven's sake! Why would he do this and not tell me? I don't want him to get in trouble over me, this wasn't the plan!"

"I'm not sure what they'll do to him. He defied the Queen so some sort of punishment will be involved. However, he is her best Sheriff and had never caused trouble before. It will likely depend on her mood. She makes most of her decisions on a whim."

My heart broke seeing the events of the past week through new eyes. His sour mood was because he knew this was going to happen if he didn't convince me to bond with him. He was taking a risk on his safety hoping that I would bond with him. The looks of struggle weren't about wanting to kill me or care for me anymore, it was about whether he could admit he loved me. My anger toward his supposed betrayal had made me push him away instead of seeing what he was trying to do the best way he knew how. My crying turned into sobs thinking I'd never have the chance to tell him I understood.

"I didn't know." I kept saying through my tears.

Pam's frightened countenance softened a bit. "Stop leaking. Eric will be fine though this never should have happened in first place. You both are gifted at being incredibility stupid. Andre will come for you now though. You should be prepared."

"If I kill him, there's no hope I can ever be with Eric is there? Not without him getting into a lot of trouble right?"

"For Eric to bond with you now would be in direct defiance of the Queen. Kill Andre and then run away."

The wheels began to turn in my mind, formulating a plan to get us all out of this mess. Pam knowing only could endanger her, though, so I just nodded my head to agree with her solution.

"You should leave. Unless you want to be forced to help Andre take me to the Queen."

"I want no part of this. I really hope you survive, or Eric is going to be unbearable to live with the next couple decades." She huffed and left me alone in the library. Gathering my wits about myself, I threw the book in the chair and changed into my warrior gear. Feeling like a strong independent woman. I opted to wear one of the red leather getups that was meant for Fangtasia instead of sweats. I went to the sword room and picked up my tsais. I'd been scared about this encounter and what it would mean for weeks, but now I was finally ready. I wasn't just fighting for my life anymore, I was fighting for a chance for Eric and I to be together. Even if I did have to storm the Queen's palace and take every single one of them down, I could do it. No more doubting, I was powerful and it was time I truly embraced it and kicked some Vampire ass.

An hour later I was starting to feel incredibly impatient when I felt it. A Vampire had just entered the house. I quickly scanned over the void to find it was Andre. I closed my eyes and concentrated on his movements. I felt him coming and turned around to see him leaning in the doorway. His lips were turned up into a grin as large as his face would allow. He exuded confidence and victory. Little did he know that this wasn't going to be a simple pick up the stupid human mission. If things went my way tonight would be the last of his existence. He was wearing black dress slacks, a black silk shirt, and his long dark hair was slicked back into a ponytail. He smelled like designer cologne. Besides his scary and dangerous demeanor he could pass as a normal attractive man.

"Hello, what brings you here tonight?" I sarcastically asked him.

"I heard your bond to Northman was just a ploy."

" Yes, he wanted to bring Marco out of shadows to prevent his eventual attempt on his life."

"So he told us. He probably wouldn't have gotten in any trouble if he would have told us right away. But for making us wait, he's enjoying being chained and covered in silver right now." He smirked at me and licked his lips. Slowly, he started walked toward me giving me a thorough eye fuck the whole time. "The Queen will love that outfit on you. Are you ready to be my pet?"

"Never." His intent may have been to frighten me, but it was only pissing me off, and I wasn't going to control my magic on him. His bone-chilling laughter filled the room as he began to circle me.

"As if you have a choice. What could you possible do to escape me?"

"Right, because I'm just a helpless human." He stopped in front of me giving a devilish grin.

"Of course you are. Though that gift of yours is certainly useful." He leaned in and smelled my hair, trailing his finger up my arm. It took all my strength not to end him right there but I wanted him to think he had me. His extreme arrogance would only make his defeat that much more sweet.

"I won't go with you. You'll have to kill me before I serve the Queen or bond to you."

"While normally I would be more than obliged to meet your requests, your talent is far to important to us. You will be leaving here with me, it's up to you what condition you're in." He went to grab me by the hair so in reply, I threw my magic toward him and hurled him into the mirrors. His face took on a look of utter surprise and glee. "No wonder he wanted to keep you around. You're not that human are you?" He barreled toward me but my shields were already up propelling him off me and into another set of mirrors. I pushed my mind into his and was rewarded with a screaming high-pitched sound in my head. It made my entire body shake with pain. I covered my ears with my hands and sunk to the floor willing the pain to stop.

"You're not the only one with tricks up her sleeve. Did you really think I would be so easy to beat just because you possess some magic?" he snarled while he came to stand over me. The noise and pain increased, making me writhe on the ground, trying not to cry out in pain and fear. He projected horrible images to me that greatly resembled several dreams I'd had of him torturing me.

"You will be my slave and whore. You'll beg for my blood and love the taste of my cock in your mouth." He grabbed me by the hair and started dragging me out of the room. My confidence gave away to panic as he ripped my hair out dragging me along. My body shuttered from the continued pain and what might happen next. In the hallway, he threw me up against the wall and started tearing off my clothes. More than anything, I wanted to make him stop but the noise and pain in my head wouldn't let me concentrate on anything. Tears overflowed as I realized he was probably going to start the raping right here and now.

" After I've had my fun with your warm delicious body I'll be your maker and god." To demonstrate this point, he bore his fangs and sunk them into my neck. I struggled against him and he cranked up the pain in my head, making my knees buckle. When he pulled back, his eyes were crazed and filled with bloodlust. "You're blood is like a delicacy. You will be only mine." He bent back down and took more of my life force. Between the pain and blood loss, I felt like I was going to pass out. I wanted to pass out though. The pain and disappointment of my failure was overwhelming me.

"For fun, I think I'll even kill Northman and make you watch" My head snapped up to meet his gaze and deep snarl escaped my chest. Rage bottled up in me at the idea of him hurting Eric, I couldn't let that happen. Being responsible for my own life was one thing, but I couldn't let this monster hurt the one's I loved. I remembered Hekate's advice to keep trying no matter what. In that moment I let go of who I was. My entire life I had been fighting to be a normal human being. Even recently with Hekate I though I had accepted what I was, but I had only done so in addition to my humanity. The truth was I wasn't like everybody else and I never was going to be. I was something more, something powerful, something that could kill this Vampire. Reaching through the immense pain, I found my power and completely released it from deep inside myself, letting it flow freely instead of containing it. I threw it out from me, effectively getting Andre out of my head and putting my mental barriers back up. My shield went up and my skin started glowing that familiar blue color.

"You will never touch me or Eric you insignificant, hideous Vampire." With ease,I threw him against the wall and pinned him like I had Eric several days before. His skin started sizzling and his eyes grew wide with surprise. Without abandon, I forced my way into his mind and closed off whatever it was he had been doing to me before. For a moment I stood still reveling in the amount of power running through me. My entire body felt like an electrical surge, it was incredible! It felt like I had put on an entire new skin now that I had accepted all of who I was. The power and energy was much easier to use, barely having to will something before it was automatically done.

"You've probably gone your entire life being the big scary Vampire always hunting on the weak and innocent. I doubt there's many being out there that could actually torture or kill you; make you feel what all your victims have. Well today you've met your match" I grinned at him while I put one of my tsais in his left hand and willed him to start cutting himself all over his body with it. After the cuts healed I made him do it all over again. Granted I wasn't one for torture, but he had pushed me beyond my limits of self control. He didn't scream or moan but red tears started running down his cheeks.

"Is this what you had planned for me? Hurt me over and over again and give me your blood, so I wouldn't die. How does it feel? Do you enjoy it so much now that you're the victim?" He screamed in pain as I forced him to slice his neck open. He lost a lot of blood before the wound finally began to heal. "What are you?" He said in-between unnecessary gasps.

My lips curved up into a smile. "I'm part Fae, dear Andre. Supposedly from quite the bloodline, given the strength of my powers. I'm also the one that's going to finally kill you." I took the tsai from his hand and placed one of them on each side of his neck.

"Any last words?"

Fear crossed his features but he remained silent. I listened to his thoughts to hear his reaction.

'How could this bitch kill me? Hundreds of years only to be beaten by a wimpy human girl. I can't believe this is happening.'

I leaned in close to his face. "Oh, but it is happening. If there's any kind of afterlife for you I hope you get to spend it thinking about how the last you thing you saw was my smirking face. And I'm not human." With that I sliced both of the tsais across his neck effectively detaching his head from the rest of his body. His remains quickly started turning to ash.

I had done it. I had killed Andre. Not only that, but I felt like I had morphed into an entirely different creature. Even after the battle the energy flow never ebbed. It was constant now instead of being held deep inside me. I could tell I wasn't going to have to summon the magic anymore, it was an integral part of me.

While supernatural warriors probably don't cry, I started balling as the adrenaline began to wear off. Feeling numb, and yet giddy I went and got a broom and dustpan to clean up what was left of Andre. With every sweep of the broom my smile grew wider. Relief flooded me knowing with absolute certainty my dreams would never come true. I started laughing in euphoric glee as I walked to the trashcan and dumped his remains in. It felt so good to have beaten that sick bastard. I closed the lid on the trashcan also effectively shutting the door on that part of my life. After I was finished, I went to my room, sat down on the bed, and took some deep calming breaths. I had almost been raped, drained, and captured in the past hour then turned around and tortured and killed besides torturing and killing a very old vampire. On top of that I was now undeniably not human and very much a full blown supe.

My thoughts turned to Eric and whether he was alright. I wondered how in the world I was going to find him. I'm sure the Queen had a house of some sorts, but who knew if he was being held there. I was really wishing I could feel him the same way he felt me, then I wouldn't be in this predicament. It appeared that my only option was finding the Queen and forcing her to tell me where he was and let him go. My fingers started rubbing my pendant out of habit. Grasping the pendant I realized I was holding the exact solution to my problem.

' _Of course! Hekate told me I would need this for something important.'_ I picked up the pendant and eyed it closely. I smiled to myself, happy Hekate had followed her instincts. When I had first put it on, I was automatically drawn to Mark, but right now, I didn't feel anything. Not quite sure how to make it work for tracking someone else I decided it might need a little help to get started, I closed my eyes, pictured Eric, and let my magic flow out my hand into the necklace. Immediately, I felt a pull and smiled wide at my accomplishment. No matter where the pendant led, I would follow. Eric was my future, and this time, he needed me to save him. Whoever was responsible for his torture was going to pay. The hunters had just become the prey.

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EEK! Exciting stuff huh? My adrenaline was pumping and I was near tears writing some of these scenes. I hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. Was it what you were expecting, did it suprise you? Hit the little green button and let me know! :K


	15. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know...this was FAR to long to make you wait. *dodges flying objects* Life just got a little bit crazy, so so sorry guys! This was another hard chapter but I think it turned out absolutely fantastic and will make the long wait worth it.

I know, I know...this was FAR to long to make you wait. *dodges flying objects* Life just got a little bit crazy, so so sorry guys! This was another hard chapter but I think it turned out absolutely fantastic and will make the long wait worth it.

Thank you once again to my amazing beta YoungBoho, she rocks! And of course to all of you awesome readers. Your comments make my day and encourage me to write. Much 3

* * *

The next evening I woke with a calm sense of purpose. After killing Andre last night, I wanted to get on the road right away, but I was exhausted. My body was too used to Vampire hours, so I let myself drift to sleep as the sun started peeking over the horizon.

When I woke up, it was dark so I called Pam to let her know what was going on. "Since you're alive I'm assuming the bastard is finally dead?"

"Yes, he's dead. I sliced his head off after torturing him a bit. It was very satisfying to put that behind me." Sheesh, I was starting to sound like Pam now—enjoying ending somebody's life.

She snickered into the phone, "You would make an excellent Vampire."

"I'm beginning to think so too." She gasped on the other end, and all sarcasm disappeared from her voice.

"Really? You're going to let Eric turn you?"

"I'm seriously considering it. The only thing holding me back before was that I loved my humanity. But after last night, I can finally admit to myself that I've never really been human. My only concern is the effects my Fae heritage would have on the transformation. But none of that really matters because I have to save Eric before that's even a possibility."

"You know then." Vampires. I rolled my eyes at their constant clipped sentences and mysterious way of communicating.

"Well, I know that Andre told me he was being tortured with silver for not turning me over to the Queen as soon as Marco was killed."

"Yes, that's true," she said hesitantly, begging me to drag the information out of her.

"What aren't you telling me?"

Several seconds passed before she spoke, taking my anxiety to dangerous levels.

"A child and their maker share a bond, you know; it's how a maker can call their child to them at any time and why they must follow every command given by their master."

I wasn't quite sure where she was going with this, but I was getting impatient. "Out with it!" Her voice dropped to barely whisper. "He's in a lot of pain. He keeps me blocked off most of the time, but the pain is so immense, it's seeping through. Not only that, but the Queen called to tell me Eric had been relieved of his position as Sheriff, and I was going to be instated."

' _No, no, no! This can't be happening, why would she do that to him?'_

"I don't understand. Why would she punish him so harshly for something so trivial?"

"I told you that her punishments are usually based on a whim. There's nothing I can do to change things, she is Queen. " Her words started to come out strangled like she was holding back tears. I couldn't blame her; this was essentially the second time she had lost her friend and maker in less than a month. "I just hope he survives this."

"Of course he will. I'm going to get him."

"You can't possibly be serious! Even if you could find him you would be disobeying the Queen's orders. Sookie, do you realize that to get him out you would have to kill the Queen herself? Impossible!"

"For people that don't like being controlled, you guys sure do have a messed up power structure. Trust me, I can handle myself now. I've been upgraded to Sookie 2.0" I giggled at my words and how true they were. "I don't plan on killing the Queen or starting anything, unless I absolutely have to. But I _am_ getting Eric out of there and I'm making it clear that I am _not_ a pawn to played around with."

Pam groaned into my ear. "Please don't get yourself killed, you may not have seen the change in Eric since you haven't known him that long, but trust me, he has been unhappy for hundreds of years. I know that when I tried to kill you it implied gave the impression that I didn't like you, but I do. I understand now what you've done for my master."

You could have knocked me over with a feather, I was so taken back by her words. Pam had never opened up to me. From that night in the club, I knew her feelings toward me had changed, but I would have never guessed in a million years that she would actually vocalize it all to me.

"Wow. Thanks, Pam. I like you too. I'm going to go save our man now, and yes, I'll be careful."

"Hurry," she said before hanging up. Her words were laced with worry and pain for whatever Eric was going through. Grabbing the pendant off the nightstand and the suitcase I had packed before I went to bed from by the door, I headed out to rescue my Vampire.

The pull of the pendant was always clear in helping me make my decisions. I found myself driving south on I-49 toward New Orleans. I felt like the hero in a movie when the sidekick asks them what the plan is and they don't have an answer except to wing it. Not only did I not have a plan, though, I didn't even have a sidekick. Any rational person could see I didn't have a chance in hell at saving Eric and keeping my life intact, but I kept driving anyways. Heroes always managed to get out of sticky situations, so maybe I could too; regardless I couldn't imagine my life without Eric so there was no turning back now.

Two hours later, I drove into Alexandria, LA, which was where I normally turn off onto some back roads to get to New Orleans quicker. The pendant told me to stay on 49, though, so I followed it, interested to see exactly where it was taking me. Another hour and a half later I was in Lafayette, continuing to head deeper and deeper into southern Louisiana.

Feeling groggy and hungry, I pulled into a gas station to fill up and stretch my legs. While the very slow gas pump fueled my car, I went inside to relieve my bladder and buy some coffee. Once I got back out to my car, the pump was finally done so I hung it up, screwed the cap back on the tank, and got back on the road. But instead of getting back on 49, I felt myself being pulled directly south, so I pulled onto US-90.

In order to keep my thoughts preoccupied I blared my radio and sang with every song I knew and even some I didn't. Just when I could feel I was getting closer to my destination, my car started making this awful sputtering noise and then it died. Quickly, I pulled over to the side of the road. I turned the key in the ignition several times but it wouldn't turn over. I laughed at the face Eric would surely make if he could see me now. He liked to give me a hard time over my "death trap" of a vehicle. Apparently he was right. My laughter became tears as I thought about Eric and what he must be going through right now. All I wanted to do was get to my Vampire, but I felt like I was never going to accomplish my goal. Anger flooded me that fate could be so cruel as to give me someone like Eric and then make it impossible to get to him. I wiped the tears away and firmly gripped the steering wheel, determined not to become pessimistic. My magic flowed out into the machinery, and I used my telekinesis to will it to go. It worked and I pulled back onto the highway. It was an odd sensation, driving with my mind instead of my feet; it was kind of like the detached feeling of driving in a video game.

Another half hour later and I had reached my destination: Raceland, Louisiana. It was one o'clock in the morning and I was so happy to finally be here. There wasn't a lot to the tiny town, but it was holding my destiny captive. Industrial buildings lined the street along with worn down farmhouses. This was a place where you could have a safe house of sorts and no one would ever know about it. Screams would never be heard, and there weren't enough people even to notice the coming and goings of strangers. If I were an evil sadistic Vampire Queen, I would hold people here, too.

After driving through several back roads, I found myself turning onto St. Patrick Street. A couple blocks down, and I was there. At first glance, it didn't look like anything but an abandoned outbuilding and several old rusted cars. But upon further "reading" of the property I discovered there must be a whole building underground, as there were several mind hums moving around below the surface. From what I counted, there were four Weres in the building on the back right of the land and twenty more downstairs. There were also two Vampires roaming around the complex.

My heart lurched, my mouth went dry, tears stung my eyes, and my hands gripped the steering wheel so hard my knuckles turned white as I felt _him._ Eric was here! Nothing has ever compared to the glee I felt in that moment. I had found the love of my life and he was still alive; his mind was still humming with activity.

' _I'm here baby. Don't worry, I'm getting you out of there'_ I sent to him.

' _Sookie!'_ He sounded strained and had to work to continue "talking" to me.

' _Oh, Sookie . . . you're alive! What are you doing here? Leave now or they'll kill you.' There_ was a strong tinge of panic but also happiness to his mind voice.

' _Trust me, I can handle them now. A lot has changed since you left. Enough for now, I need to get you out of there.'_

Jumping out of the car, I ran toward the worn building. The Louisiana humidity made me feel like I was running against a wall of heat. Sweat quickly broke out on my skin, and it was hard to breath. Once I was a few hundred feet from the structure, all four Weres smelled me and came running out.

"Who are you?" The one on the far right growled at me.

"Oh, I'm just the little girl that's gonna kick your ass," I said in my thickest sweet southern girl accent.

They all stared at me before simultaneously breaking out into deep guttural laughter. I, for one, don't appreciate being laughed at, so they were very effective in pulling my extremely sensitive anger trigger.

With a vengeance, I flung them all up against the wall and held them there. In a booming voice exuding power and confidence, I screamed at them "I do not like being mocked gentleman."

Their eyes grew wide with horror, realizing that I was not at all what I seemed. Walking up to each one of them, I forced my way into their head willing them to sit still and not do anything but breathe. I asked the last one how to get to the lower level, and he explained how to call the elevator up from below. Following his instructions, I found myself riding in a steel elevator, trying to give myself a pep talk. I'd never faced so many people all at once. Theoretically, I could just pin them all down like I did upstairs, but there was no way I could feel 100% confident my abilities were that strong until I tried. Saying a silent prayer, I stepped off into what could only be explained as a steel underground bunker.

Compared to the blistering heat outside, the compound had a cool, sterile feeling to it. The only smell was cleaning chemicals as if the walls had recently been bleached down. I shuddered unable to keep out the feeling of death that loomed in the air, much like when you enter a hospital. Except I knew there were no happy stories of survivors from this place. No one who was sentenced here was meant to get out alive.

With a steadying breath, I took off to the right, letting the pendant and Eric's mind bubble guide me toward him. My scent must have gone before me, as four Weres rounded the corner running at full speed while yelling into a walkie talkie strapped to their shoulder. Several more men rounded the corner behind me effectively trapping me inside. They simultaneously lunged at me, causing my shield to go up in a knee-jerk reaction. Joy erupted in me at the fact my powers were becoming second nature now that I had let it all loose. It was a good thing, too, because these Weres were quick and my shield was up only moments before the impact. They went flying muttering out curse words, all with surprised looks on their pained faces. A loud siren filled the halls, echoing noisily off the steel walls. The lights shut off, slamming me into utter darkness and taking away any advantage I had. My body was still emanating a slight glow from the shield I wrapped around myself, but that was the only illumination I had to attack my assailants.

My skin bristled when a large metal net was thrown on top of me. At first I thought it was ridiculous how they expected to harm me with a silver net, but my shields didn't hold it off of me. I was thrown to the ground by the mere weight of the material. The smell of burning flesh met my nose as tears stung my eyes from the unbearable amount of pain. It was my flesh burning! I didn't understand how this could be happening, I wasn't a Vampire!

A bloodcurdling scream tore from my lips as the metal dug its way into my severally burned skin. I didn't want to give them the satisfaction of torturing me, but the pain was so overwhelming I couldn't help but vocalize my protests over and over again. They started dragging my down the halls toward where Eric was being held. Every single step was like cutting off a limb; it was so mind numbingly painful. My body was demanding I pass out to avoid everything, but I wouldn't let myself. I was about to see Eric again, and I had to stay focused. They propped my up on a stand of sorts and removed the blanket before clamping my wrists and ankles down with shackles that burned into my skin.

"What is this stuff?" I managed to whisper to the Were who had tightened the clamps.

"Iron," he told me in an exasperated voice while rolling his eyes. He acted like it was obvious and I was even dumber for not knowing that than I was for sneaking into this maximum-security building in the first place.

' _Iron? I don't get it, why would Iron hurt me?'_ I shrugged it off, figuring I could ask Eric about it if we ever got out of this mess.

As the Were stepped away from me, I found myself face to face with Eric. My heart started throbbing as fast as the hoof beats of a racehorse. Fresh tears stung my eyes as I saw how badly he was beaten up and marred. He had been stripped of his clothes and tortured with something that had torn his skin off in several places across his chest. He was paler than normal from extensive blood loss; the evidence of which could still be seen all over the floor. Both eyes were nearly swollen shut and unhealed bruises lingered under the surface of both cheeks. It looked like his right arm was broken along with all the fingers on his left hand. His normal golden locks were matted with dirt, blood, and sweat. More than anything I wanted to give him my blood so I could see his beautiful marble skin become as perfect as I was used to seeing. Eric all bloodied and bruised was just so wrong and made my heart ache with sorrow for him. Lazily he lifted his head and our eyes met. The moment he saw me relief, fear, anger, and regret played across his features.

' _Soo . . . kie,'_ he whispered weakly to me in my head.

' _They threw a net of Iron over me and it burned. But don't worry, I'm still getting us out of this.'_

With all the strength I had left in me, I used my telekinesis to unlock the shackles around my wrists and arms. The guards looked at me with surprise and contempt as I stepped off my platform. They grabbed weapons off a nearby counter full of several torture devices. For a moment, my eyes were captivated by all the instruments on the table and the dried blood that was surely Eric's. Anger welled up in me and gave me the energy I needed to throw all of them up against the wall. Just as two very angry Vampires rushed into the room, I lurched for Eric and popped us both to his house.

Thankfully, when we arrived, I could sense Eric was in the room with me. I hadn't ever tried to pop anyone with me so I wasn't sure it was going to actually work. Stumbling over random items of clothing and shoes on the floor, I found my way to the light switch in his day chamber. When I turned them on, I found Eric lying on the bed staring at the ceiling.

"Are you awake?"

"Yes. I need blood though, I'm very weak." He choked out without moving an inch.

I ran upstairs to the kitchen and heated up an entire case of TruBlood for him. He may hate the nasty stuff, but I was extremely glad he was smart enough to keep it around in case of emergencies like this one. Back downstairs, he drank all of them in only a few minutes, not taking a break in between. In awe, I watched his wounds start to heal themselves. He wasn't completely fixed, but he pulled me onto his lap. Even with being so beat up my body was reacting to being in such close proximity to Eric's. My heart rate accelerated and I wanted nothing more than to jump him right then and there. However, we needed to talk about some things first. Apparently he agreed with my train of thought because he gave me his best disapproving glare before softly reprimanding me.

"Why did you come after me? They could have killed you!"

"What? No thank you for saving my life?" I retorted sarcastically.

"Saving my life isn't worth this cost," he said, motioning toward my burnt skin. In the aftermath of getting him out of there and making sure he was alive, the adrenaline had kept the pain at bay, but now that he mentioned it, any skin that wasn't covered by clothing felt like it was still on fire.

"I couldn't let them hurt you. Not when you were being tortured because of me."

His gaze became clouded and a barely tempered fury swam behind his eyes.

"Pam spoke to you?"

"Yes. She didn't understand what was going on. She thought we were bonded and everything was just peachy."

"Peachy?"

"It means everything was fine, good." He nodded his understanding.

Several minutes of silence ticked by while he mulled the situation with his child over. I didn't want to interrupt him, but I desperately wanted to hear the words I hoped he would be able to say now.

"Why didn't you tell the Queen right after that night with Marco?"

He sighed deeply and looked at me with eyes so full of emotion that I couldn't distinguish exactly what he was feeling. "I don't know. I just couldn't let you go with Andre, he would have been so cruel to you."

"I see." Those weren't the words I was looking for, and I'm sure he knew that.

"I'm sorry, but Vampire's don't love."

But he did love me! Why couldn't he just admit it? I wanted him, all of him for eternity, if he would just have me. After all we'd just been through together, I felt like he had slapped me in the face. Maybe Vampires in general don't love, but I know mine could if he'd stop being so pig-headed. My faith in him was starting to waiver though. I mean if you hear something enough times you start to believe it. In this situation his words held so much more validity and depth. If he could deny me now, I doubted he would ever actually be able to admit his feelings for me.

"Really? After all that, I'm still only a pet to you? Someone that you find interesting or useful? Even if you 'care' for me, what good does that do me?" I stood off the bed, feeling every excruciating movement.

"I have put myself in serious danger because of you. I disregarded orders from my Queen in order to try and keep you safe! Obviously me caring for you does some good!"

"The only reason you did that was because it gave you longer to convince me to bond with you so you could keep my talents to yourself!"

The look on his face told me I'd crossed a line I shouldn't have. I didn't really mean what I'd said but there was no taking it back now. Surprisingly instead of yelling at me, the anger faded from his face and was replaced with a deep sadness.

"Is that really what you think?"

Of course it wasn't what I thought.

"No. But if we're going to work in a relationship, or being bonded or whatever; things would have to change. Such as, I would want you to only feed and sleep with me. I want to come before all your stupid Vampire politics and business things. Yes, that does sound selfish but I want to do the same thing for you. The problem is, I can't trust you're willing to make those sacrifices if you can't even sacrifice your big bad image to admit your feelings for me."

For the first time I can ever remember Eric Northman actually looked speechless.

"I…I don't know what to say. I do care for you though."

My emotions felt like they had been drug behind a horse for miles. I was tired of this up and down rollercoaster. I loved him more than anything, but there comes a point in time you have to let go of people or things that are holding you back. If Eric couldn't tell me he loved me then I had to stop thinking he eventually would. For my mental well-being I had to start doing something with my life other than pining for Eric.

"I'll fix everything with the Queen and then you'll never see me again and I expect to never see you. You have no idea how grateful I am and always will be for your help these past couple of months, but apparently we have no future together. Goodbye, Eric." Even though I could have popped out of the room, I headed for the stairs, a large part of me hoping he wouldn't let me go. I made it all the way up the stairs through the movie and foyer rooms, out the door, and onto the driveway and he still hadn't come after me. Realizing my car was still at the awful compound I plopped down in the middle of the driveway and broke out in hysterical tears. I knew I should pop myself home but my heart couldn't bear the thought of actually separating myself from Eric. My dreams of saving him and us living happily ever after were being crushed, taking my aching heart right along with them.

"Sookie?" Came Eric's voice from above me. When I looked up at him, I gasped as I saw blood red tears streaming down his face.

"Come back inside with me."The desperation was evident in his voice and my heart soared to new heights of undulated hope. The rational part of my brain told me to leave him right there and never talk to him again. Going back inside with him probably meant he was going to try and reason that caring for me should be good enough. But the look on his face and the tears staining his cheeks gave me the courage to put my good sense away and follow him back inside the house and down to his bed.

He placed my on his lap again making me grit my teeth from the pain my burnt skin was causing. After a few minutes of collecting himself he carefully gripped my arms and bore into me with an extremely passionate gaze.

"Sookie, I can't lose you. You're everything to me. Your face has tormented me for weeks, and I didn't understand why. Not until the night you told me all the things you were sending to me was love. All those emotions were exactly what I had been feeling. You must understand that this is so new to me. Telling you any of this puts me in such a weakened position, which is something I have never allowed in my thousand years of existence. But I would do anything for you. I . . ." he closed his eyes and looked like a man who was about to make a leap of faith he couldn't turn back from. When he opened his eyes, the message resounding in them was loud and clear.

"I love you. With every ounce of who and what I am, I love you."

A smile broke out on my face, and tingles of happiness spread throughout my entire body. I leaned in close and whispered. "I love you too, you stubborn Viking!" Nothing could have rained on my parade in that moment. All that existed was me, Eric, and our love for each other. It may have taken him forever to actually admit it, but the elation I was feeling was well worth the wait. We kissed but both winced in pain. Our bodies still were marred and thoroughly beaten. Without our supe genes, we both surely wouldn't have survived the night's events. I wanted to be close to him, feel him inside me but we were both far to injured so I pulled back and offered him my wrist and the life force he needed to heal. He surprised me by lifting his wrist to my mouth as well.

I gave him a confused look. "But, we'll be bonded if I drink from you too."

"Yes. If you'll have me, I want you to be my bonded. "

At first I couldn't wrap my head around the fact he had actually asked me to bond with him; it seemed too good to be true that he would want me forever. A few minutes later he started to look very nervous and frustrated. "Uh, it's ok if you don't want to be bond, we don't have to." I had been so wrapped up in my rejoicing and thoughts I had forgotten to give him an answer. "Oh! Of course I want you! I have the moment I walked into your bar, I just didn't understand why." He smiled sweetly at me before he tore into his wrist and offered it to me. Gladly, I suckled on the wound while he bit my wrist. My entire body shuddered from the feeling of his fangs inside me again; boy how I'd missed that feeling.

The moment we exchanged blood, I felt like I had just been stuck with a shot of adrenaline; pure energy coursed through me and around use. It felt like our hearts and souls were being weaved into one inseparable entity. I was berated with images from Eric's human and Vampire life. The things that stood out were his wife who was extremely beautiful and I could tell he still missed her and his children. Also, the time with Appius seemed to be burned in his mind; I could barely stomach to watch it was so horrible and sickening. Finally I was consumed with images of the first time he saw me and the immediate interest he had towards me. His memories and emotions flooded into me as if we were one being. It was overwhelming and exhilarating at the same time. My magic was pulsing through me at an accelerated rate and I could feel it growing with every intake of Eric's blood. All my wounds were closing rapidly, even faster than what was normal after taking Vampire blood. Deep in my stomach, that familiar and very well missed ache began to grow, and a few minutes later, I reached my first climax without him even touching me. This blood exchange was so incredibly passionate, raw, and magical.

When his wound finally closed, I stopped and watched him drink from me for a few minutes. I reveled in the feelings I could sense through our new bond. He loved the taste of my blood to an extent I should probably be frightened of, but instead, it felt more like a compliment. It felt good to give Eric what he needed. A few minutes later, he released his grip on my wrist and looked up at me.

"I remember everything." He whispered in a reverent tone.

"That doesn't surprise me. I saw many of your memories, too."

"I'm so sorry. The way I treated you after I became myself again . . . I don't understand how you could stand being around me or still love me like you did." He pulled me into a very strong embrace, continuing to mumble about how sorry he was and what an awful person he'd been.

"Sh, it's alright now."

"You shared every part of your life with me, I convinced you to trust me and then I treated you like a criminal."

"Yes but I forgive you. Besides, during that time you opened up to me just as much. We talked about how scared and vulnerable you felt not knowing who you were."

"You lost everything though and you still came back to me."

"Of course I did. I love you."

"I'm so sorry." He repeated.

"Look, I know all that I need to now. We would have fallen in love even without that stupid curse. You, as bad-ass sheriff, can love me. You are not going to mope around and ruin our happiness."

His face burrowed up and his lip jutted out in that adorable pouty look I loved on him. "I don't deserve you." I couldn't help but laugh at the unsure way he said it. Obviously Eric Northman had never thought he didn't deserve something before. How arrogant!

"Well, I don't deserve you, but I think we'll make a fantastic pair." With our injuries now completely healed and the love and excitement bouncing through the bond, I couldn't help jumping on top of him and kissing him like a mad woman. At first it seemed like he was going to pull back and continue to rant about what a horrible person he was but I finally had my Vampire, and this time he wasn't going anywhere—except for Sophie-Anne trying to kill him and all. I couldn't imagine she would be happy about his escape. Deciding that was a problem for another day, I focused on kissing him. Not being one to be outdone sexually he gave into my advances and returned my kiss. Our tongues were all over each other's mouth's, dueling for dominance. We had been denying ourselves each other for weeks, so every touch was full of passion, lust, and hunger. He drew his hand from my knee up my thigh, making me shiver involuntarily with anticipation.

"Get these off of me" I growled into his ear. Not waiting for a second request, he ripped my jeans and panties off while I wiggled out of my shirt and bra. Before I could blink he was out of his clothes, too, showing off his perfect body that sent my heart racing. He took his time admiring my body placing kisses all over me.

"I really was a fool to stay away from this. You are so otherworldly beautiful."

My cheeks stained red at his full appraisal of me and the sweet comments.

"Wasn't this your favorite thing about our time together?" he asked innocently as he lowered himself in between my legs and wiggled his eyebrows. My insides clenched in eagerness at what was to come. I let out a shriek when his tongue glided out to lick me from my center up to my nub. My body felt like an exposed electrical wire going out of control. Wantonly, I grabbed his hair and pulled him deeper while arching my back up. He laughed into me while gently thrusting his tongue in and out of my center. His slow pace was driving me insane, but it felt so wonderful. Feeling him touch me after so long was like finally finding an oasis in the middle of the desert after days of searching.

He continued to pierce me with his tongue while his thumb traced up my leg, over my stomach, then down to my clit where he rested it. For what seemed like forever he just held his fingers over me not moving; it was torture—glorious torture—he was putting me through. I had almost forgotten just how good it was to be with Eric; I would be his captive every single day of my existence if possible. Finally, his thumb began to move, making me squeal in a surge of unprecedented pleasure.

"Please don't stop. Ugn . . . that's feels so . . . good." I was in an extreme state of frenzy as he continued to rub me into bliss. Suddenly, he put his mouth to my nub and sucked hard while thrusting two fingers deep inside me. With a loud gasp, I came all over his fingers while screaming his name. But he was relentless and continued working my pleasure center in order to draw my orgasm out as long as possible.

Greedily, he lapped up everything I had to offer him, drinking every last drop he had made me that had poured out for him.

"Mmm . . . missed you. You're so good at that."

He raised his head to give me his classic grin. With no mercy, he brought me to two more climaxes before I couldn't take it anymore.

"Please."

"Please what?"

Fury crossed my face at his ridiculousness; he knew very well what I wanted.

"Make love to me, now."

His entire being lit up at my words, and he crawled up on top of me.

"With pleasure." he purred into my ear, making pleasure sound like it was the dirtiest word ever created. Slowly, he pushed inside of me making rolls of joy course through my body. I clung to him digging my nails into his back. I closed my eyes and savored the feeling of his icy cool member sliding in and out of me. My inner walls clung to him as I tried to squeeze my muscles and bring him as much pleasure as possible.

"Lover, look at me." My eyes snapped open, searching for his. Through the bond, I could feel his love and happiness utterly overflowing. Everything in the world felt right again being there with my Viking. The peace I had felt all those weeks ago finally returned to me, making my heart whole again.

He pulled out, eliciting a whimper from me, and sat back on the bed. But before I could utter a word of protest, he pulled me onto his lap and wrapped me in a close embrace while guiding himself back inside me. In this position, I couldn't tell where he stopped and I began, we were so close to each other and the angle he was penetrating me was deliciously tantalizing.

"I love you," he whispered in my ear before nibbling on it, sending an entire new wave of sparks flying through my nervous system.

"You too," was all I managed to grunt. The pleasure he was bringing me was turning my mind and bones to mush with each deep thrust. The burning in my abdomen started to grow and spread like a wildfire through every part of my being. Eric's eyes rolled back into his head, and he started rapidly chanting something in his ancient language.

My hands latched onto his biceps in a death grip, preparing myself for what was going to happen. Each movement in and out brought me that much closer to the edge of full emotional abandonment and physical release he alone could bring me. Deftly, Eric slipped his hand between us and rubbed my now oversensitive nub. I howled as my walls clamped down around him and waves of ecstasy shot through me. Even though I tried to keep them locked on Eric, my eyes rolled back into my head. I held my breath as I rode out the extremely satisfying waves of my intense orgasm. Eric's pumping grew frantic while I milked him for all that he had. He let loose what sounded like a war cry as he poured his seed deep inside me.

We sat entwined for several minutes not saying anything or moving, remaining in a relaxed state of post-coital bliss.

"I love you, Sookie."

I smiled wide. I would never tire of hearing him say those three words to me. And, oh! How wonderful my name sounded coming off his swollen pink lips.

"I love you, too, Eric."

"But apparently no one loves Pam because I just spent the past several hours wondering what the fuck was going on. I think I deserved a phone call!"

My head jerked up to see Pam standing at the bottom of the staircase looking severely perturbed at both of us. Fire engine is the only description for the shade of red my entire body turned after realizing she was staring at Eric and me, both naked, and with him still inside of me. That Pam and her timing.

"Oh, Pamela, I know you like what you see. Care to join us?" Eric smirked at Pam and then me. His body seemed to back up his invitation as I felt him start to grow hard again inside me.

' _Oh Jesus Christ Sheppard of Judea he is joking right?_ '

* * *

TADA! I was going to have Pam interupt them in the middle of the dirty deed, but I thought that might be overly abusive to you guys-so I was very nice and let them finish first :)

Is this chapter everything you were hoping for? Please oh please hit that little blue button and let me know what you thought of this and where you think it's going to go next!


	16. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yet another chapter-yay! I really enjoyed writing this one though. Lots of unintended smut =K

Yet another chapter-yay! I really enjoyed writing this one though. Lots of unintended smut =K

Of course a big thanks to my beta, YoungBoho, she rocks!

* * *

At the look of utter horror on my face, Eric let out a low chuckle before his face softened and he turned us away from Pam in order to shield my body from view.

"Don't worry so much, lover. The idea of my two women together may be intriguing, but I don't feel like sharing you, especially not right now. You are mine."

Though it wasn't my intention, I didn't intend them to, but my feminist feathers bristled at his possessive declaration and I frowned.

Sensing my objections, he quickly silenced my protests. "You are mine . . . just as I am yours." Well, putting it that way didn't sound nearly as bad; in fact it set my heart alight with glee. I leaned in close and wrapped my arms around his neck, snuggling into his chest.

"Really, you two, we have a lot to discuss before the Queen finds us."

Eric's face became clouded and dangerous, more like the ferocious vampire he was. "Pamela, we've just completed a blood bond, and I'd prefer to enjoy my bonded without your snarky comments. Besides, you know that she has no idea where I rest. Wait upstairs."

Shock descended like a blanket over her face before her lips turned up into a lascivious grin. "Well, it's about damn time," she snorted before running in Vampire speed back up the secret stairway.

"Now, where were we?" he murmured in my ear while stirring his once-again hard cock inside me. The sudden movement caused my walls to tighten around him and a moan of pure delight to escape my relaxed mouth. Using his inhuman strength, he drove his hips up into mine at a harrowingly slow pace. After each thrust, he pulled out all the way and rubbed his tip up and down my slick folds, making me shake with desire and lust. With the precision of a thousand years of experience, he worked me into a hysteria of sexual yearning in only a few thrusts. My climax was right around the corner, but every time he brought me close to that magical release, he'd back off for a few minutes then push me right back to the edge of the glorious crevice I was desperate for.

"Mmm . . . I love watching you lose control for me. You look so beautiful when you're full of me, writhing in pleasure." His words took my libido from hysteria up to downright lustful hunger. "If you don't fuck me now, you're going to have a very mad . . ." I didn't know exactly what to call myself in relation to him. Bonded? Wife? Girlfriend? "uh . . . Sookie on your hands."

Sitting back on his haunches, he faked a chagrined attitude. "Am I not your bonded and mate?" "Mhmm" was all I could mutter, considering his fingers were still playing my nether regions like a violin. Ever so slowly, he leaned in close to my ear whispering "Then I suggest referring to yourself as such, or I will have to punish you severely." Perhaps there was something wrong with me, but his words made me want to find out exactly what his punishments could feel like. If possible, my heart rate picked up even more, and his fingers became even more soaked with my arousal. His appreciative growl in my ear warmed my insides and sent a new throng of want coursing through my body. "Perhaps I'll need to find a reason to punish you anyway since it seems to be if it's something you want so badly."

Smiling, I looked up at him and said the words that would finally make him take me like I wanted. "You can do whatever you want with me. My heart, body, and soul are yours." I could actually see shivers ripple over his skin, and the look in his eyes threatened a loss of control. The possessive streak in him apparently carried over into the bedroom, and I wanted to push him over the edge with it. The promise of what the loss of control could lead to was too much to pass up. Besides, if things got dangerous, I could always control him.

"Oh please . . . Master . . . won't you fuck me like only you can?" Inwardly I cringed at how ridiculous I thought I sounded, but Eric didn't seem to think it was weird. His fangs extended, a warrior growl emanated from deep in his chest.

"If you keep saying those things I'm not going to be able to control myself" he said as he pushed me onto my back and thrust in hard to emphasize his point. With force I threw my hands around his neck and pulled him down to my ear. "That's what I'm counting on." I said before nibbling his ear and then brutally biting his neck drawing blood. I came again as more of his blood flowed into me. It was more intense now that we were bonded, I could feel the intense sexual satisfaction he got from this. Releasing him, I pulled back and grabbed his gaze with my own. Innocently I batted my eye lashes at him a few times. "Master won't you please give me what I want." It the most sexy way I could muster I licked the drop of his blood that was dripping off the corner of my mouth. His eyes were ablaze with a fury of lust and pure desire. He flipped me onto my hands and knees, forcefully entering me from behind.

" _Yes_!" I screeched, thrilled that my Viking had let loose. With enough force to leave bruises, he gripped my hips and pounded into me, over and over again. At this angle, he was hitting deeper than ever before, causing me to gasp out in pain and in bittersweet pleasure.

"Please . . . don't . . . stop." In direct defiance with my plea he stopped moving inside me. I let out a whimper of disapproval. He bent over me making the skin on my back tingle when his cool skin came into contact with mine. His right hand came around and roughly groped my breast. "I didn't hear you ask nicely" Came his gruff voice in my ear. The demanding and sexy tone his voice had taken on was doing all sorts of things to my libido. I could feel my juices overflowing and running down onto my leg I was so wet for him. "Please don't stop—Master"

"Much better." He started pounding into me again making me cry out every time he hit that secret spot. It was almost too much and hurt a little bit, but the pain actually turned me on even more. I came twice, violently, before he sank his fangs into my shoulder, triggering yet another orgasm. At the same time, I felt his length bulge then release deep inside me. Collapsing on the bed, I released a contented sigh that only comes after being thoroughly loved by my Vampire. Eric let himself down next to me while I snuggled into the pillows. I rolled over to stare into his very concerned face, his fingers searching my body. "I'm so sorry, lover, I've never been so careless with you before. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. That was incredible. You can punish me like that anytime." "That won't happen again. I could have broken your pelvis or worse!" "Don't be such a drama queen. If you started hurting me, I could have stopped you." I let my power prickle to the surface and made my skin glow the familiar blue color to prove my point. While he gently traced circles on my forearm, his facial expressions went from worried to awestruck. "You taste almost completely Fae now," he said absentmindedly as he continued to lazily trace patterns over my skin.

"Is that a good or bad thing?" His shoulders shrugged slightly as he spoke.

"It tastes like you—only better. Normally drinking just a drop of blood that tastes like yours would put me into a frenzy. Maybe because we're bonded, I can withstand it. From now on, no other Vampire can have your blood, no matter what the circumstances are."

"It doesn't really surprise me. When I was fighting Andre, I finally accepted that I'm not actually human; that's when my Fae abilities started to manifest."

"It's also why an iron net can burn you, and I would suggest staying away from lemons. They are natural weaknesses of Faeries."

"Oh," I said, slightly disappointed. I was going to miss having lemon in my sweet tea. Sensing my sadness through the bond, he looked at me questioningly. "Are you upset you chose this fate? That you gave up your humanity?"

"No. I wanted to be able to have my own life and save you. This is who I was meant to be. It just took a crazy adventure to get me to realize it. I like being able to protect those I love." He beamed at me, proud that I had become such a strong person in his absence.

"We should get upstairs before Pam destroys my house." I chuckled feverishly for a few minutes.

"As if you haven't beat up your poor house already." His brow furrowed and he cradled my face in his hands.

"I was tormented during those few weeks without you. My heart and soul yearned for you, my brain was just too stubborn to admit it." This was one of those "aw" moments in life; my heart melted and surged with joy that he finally could admit his feelings for me. Reaching up, I swept some stray hairs off his face and planted a sweet kiss on his lips. He pulled me on top of him, and I could feel his erection pushing into my thigh.

"Pam will kill us if we make her wait any longer. We have all of eternity to love each other." His eyebrow quirked at my vocabulary selection. "Are you saying . . ." "I'm saying nothing. Let's go upstairs. Get dressed!" His eyes continued to roam my face and body while I got dressed, silently asking me to continue the conversation. After a few minutes, he gave up and threw on a pair of red silk boxer shorts. Seeing him in those shorts, made my heart and my womanhood start to throb. He looked up at me with a fangy smirk and started to slink toward me like a lion ready to pounce on the gazelle. "Oh, no, we are going upstairs!" Before he could change my mind, I popped myself upstairs to the sitting room. Pam was sitting on the couch (which was still the only piece of unharmed furniture in the room) and appeared to be in down time.

"So nice of you to join me." She said, making me jump. It was like having a stone cold statue suddenly start speaking to you.

"Sorry, but you've seen what we've been through. He finally admitted actually admitted he loves me; we needed some time together whether the Queen is after us or not." She gave me a complacent look before going back to brooding. After a few moments of uncomfortable silence she glanced over at me with mild curiosity splayed across her features. "What's it like, being bonded?" she asked . I was surprised she would even care to know. I couldn't really ever see her wanting to be with a human. She barely liked me and I was technically her mistress now. Having not actually been bonded very long I took a moment to think before I answered her.

"I can feel him now, I'm assuming how you guys can feel us if you have our blood. Our emotions are separate, but at the same time, it's almost like I can actually feel them flowing out of me into him and vice versa. In human marriages, it's all about two becoming one; this actually feels like that instead of simply saying it." Speaking of the bond, I felt a large surge of pride, happiness, and lust come through loud and clear as Eric walked in.

"So are you saying we're married now, lover?"

"Not according to the state of Louisiana were not, but what we have is more meaningful than most marriages I've seen," I replied, crossing the room and letting him fold me in his arms for a loving embrace. "Perhaps you should find someone to bond with Pam."

She glared at both of us, not even dignifying my suggestion with a response. Eric sat on the floor and pulled me onto his lap. The tension in the room was palpable. I knew we needed to talk about the upcoming events, but I couldn't help feeling there was a huge decision about to be made without my input. Again.

"We should leave immediately. I've already started the process of liquidating your local assets while you were gone. Where exactly do you think we should go?" Pam asked, looking straight over my head to Eric.

"I was thinking about returning home. It's been quite some time since I've seen Charles. He could ensure that the Queen wouldn't bother us. She won't have any power outside of North America anyway." It took all my self-control not to bust up laughing at the pouty teenage look Pam was wearing.

"Staying anywhere near the states is definitely not an option. We went to see Charles last time though, I was hoping for a place closer to my old home. Francesca is quite the hospitable Queen." She said as her fangs extended at the memory she was reliving in her head.

"This is not a sexual rendezvous, Pamela." Eric's voice was thread with absolute authority.

"Excuse me, but we're not going anywhere." I butted in, extremely annoyed they had once again opted to leave me out of the decision process. Taking a deep breath, I stuffed my anger down and tried to remember that they had been making these cunning strategies together for centuries. Things weren't going to change just because I was in the picture now. Pam snorted at me and rolled her eyes. "Well it's your death if you stay here."

"No, it won't be. The entire reason I fought Andre and went after Eric is because I want to have a choice. I'm going to live my life how I want, with who I want. If that means going after the Queen herself, then I will."

"I won't allow you to do that!" came Eric's concerned and upset voice. His emotions through the bond were barreling me over and rendering me speechless. He must have been thinking about losing me because the massive amount of fear and grief he was sending was insurmountable.

"I'm not going to die unless you don't stop berating me with all those intense feelings." Immediately, the tension eased as he blocked some of his emotions from me. "I'm not saying I want to go and kill the Queen or anything, but I want to set up a meeting with her and talk about everything. She needs to know that I am not Vampire and that I'm above her and her stupid laws—no offense guys—so she needs to get out of my business and back off. If she's not ok with that, then I'll just have to teach her a lesson or two." Both my Vampires' mouths were hanging slightly open, shocked by my progressive plan.

"Once you enter her palace, she'll never willingly let you go." Letting out a frustrated sigh, I popped off Eric's lap and onto the couch beside Pam. "As if they can keep me."

"They'll know you're Fae; they'll be able to smell you like the guards at the compound did. They could use iron on you."

"Yes they could, but I didn't know that was even a weakness before. Now I'll be looking out for it."

Pam had been mulling everything over the past several minutes and chose to spoke up."I think it's a great idea—if it works—but even then, Eric and I are still under her control. _We_ still have to run."

"I don't think you guys understand. My intent isn't to convince her to leave me alone; it's to show her I'm superior and deserve her respect. You will be under my protection. It's only fair, since in a way, I'm responsible for this mess. Hopefully, she'll even let you retain your position as Sheriff, Eric." Now they were both looking at me like I was stark, raving mad. "What?" I asked. "I know Faeries are about the only other supe that has come close to putting Vampires in their place. Not only am I Fae, but I have some extra abilities, too. I didn't accept it at first, but the fact is I'm pretty powerful. I plan on using that power to keep our lives just how we want them."

"And what about when you become a Vampire? What happens if you lose all this power and the Queen comes after you?" Pam blurted out. I gave her a dirty look, letting her know that I hadn't discussed this subject with Eric yet. I locked onto his gaze and gave him a sweet, tender smile.

"We'll figure that out when the time comes," I said. The bond screamed with joy and excitement, making my heart race with adrenaline. "Besides, I still need to talk to Hekate and find out if that's even possible for me—being Fae and all."

"You'll actually probably live for quite some time on your own now anyway. With all the other abilities you've adapted from your heritage, it would make sense that your aging process would slow as well." I hadn't really thought about having a longer life span than the normal human; not unless I became a Vampire. A smile lit my face with the knowledge that I had extra time to figure out eternity without having to bear the pain of growing old while Eric stayed his perfect self. Before our future together could start though we had to get everything taken care of with the Queen.

"So how do I get a hold of the Queen?"

"Lover, are you absolutely sure you want to go through with this?"

"Yes, now how can I call her?" Reluctantly, Eric pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and handed it to me.

"Will she be able to find us if I use this here?" I questioned as I took the phone from his hand.

"No, it's a secure line." The bond was full of uncertainty. It was obvious that he was seriously debating taking the phone and whisking me away to some far-off land. I hit the dial button feeling confident in who and what I was, ready to get all of this over with. Sophie-Anne picked up almost immediately and started screaming in my ear.

"Eric Northman, you will report to me at once and accept your punishment, you betraying bastard. I expect you to be within my royal courts in the next hour. Consider that an order. If you try to run, I will find you." After her rant was finished she snapped her phone shut, effectively ending our one-sided conversation. Shocked, I stared at it, then dialed the number again. Sophie-Anne picked up almost immediately.

"Did you have trouble comprehending me?" came her bitter voice, drenched in disdain.

"Actually, this isn't Eric. It's Sookie Stackhouse—his bonded. I would like to request a time for Eric and me to meet with you." The line was quiet for several seconds before she started laughing hysterically.

"You want a meeting with me? Well, you honestly have no choice. I still expect you here within the hour."

"I'm sorry to disappoint, but we can't make it until tomorrow evening, say around ten?"

"Do you know who you're speaking to, human?" I could literally hear the hatred and venomous anger in her voice.

"Do you? I'm the one who killed your precious Andre." I retorted. I'm sure if I were in the room with her, she would have been utterly seething at my words. For being a very old and powerful Vampire, she was having serious difficulty controlling her impulses.

"Delaying your fate until tomorrow is of no consequence to me, but you will pay." With that threat, she hung up, ending the conversation. Pam and Eric were staring at me like I'd grown a second head or something.

"What?" Pam was the first to talk.

"No one has ever spoken to the Queen like that and lived. You not only humiliated and manipulated her, but you threw the death of her favorite child and second-in-command in her face."

Blasé, I shrugged my shoulders and walked into the kitchen. "Like I said, I'll take care of it. Besides, she was being ridiculous asking us to come tonight. The sun will be up soon and we're definitely not staying the night there so they can try and stake Eric in his sleep."

Once in the kitchen I realized I was ravenous from saving Eric and the hours of love-making so I scoured the fridge for anything to eat. Content with a simple ham sandwich and a large glass of sweetened ice tea (minus the lemon, much to my dismay), I sat down at the table to enjoy my meal while my Vampire family sat in the room discussing things they apparently thought I was still too innocent or weak to hear. Once again, I pushed down my jealousy of Pam and Eric's trusted relationship as much as possible. Perhaps in a few hundred years, Eric and I would be like that, too and we'd be more like the three musketeers instead of the two heroes and the dumb blonde. My glass dangled in midair as I thought about what it would really be like to live for that long. I'd have to watch Sam, Tara, and Jason all die before me. Jason! I hadn't even stopped to wonder how much he was affected by all this Fae stuff. I was really starting to look forward to this Vampire chaos being over, so I could catch up with my friends and family. I had really started to miss them.

By the end of my dinner, I had to convince myself to stay positive. Resolved, I decided to call everyone and give them an update tomorrow before we left so I wouldn't feel so disconnected from my old life; after all, keeping that semblance of normalcy was the reason for everything I'd done so far. Much too restless to sleep yet, I popped myself onto Eric's roof. I laid back and just stargazed for a while. It was four-thirty and the slightest glowy haze was rimming the horizon. I realized that my life had been like a sunrise lately; everything had been basked in darkness and gloom, but I had held onto the ray of hope in the distance. Eventually, parts of my life broke away into happiness and slowly let more light bathe the surface of my heart. Peace settled once again, and I let myself rejoice in the fact that Eric and I were finally bonded and had admitted our feelings. For the next several minutes, I sat with my eyes closed, really exploring our bond. Right now, it was relatively quiet; I assumed he was in down time, thinking about what was going to happen tomorrow. Tears streamed down my face at how good it felt, constantly feeling him with me. Besides my Gran, everyone shunned me while I was growing up, making me feel so lonely most of the time. Now, and for the rest of eternity, I would always have the love of my life with me. The bond shifted to mirror my peacefulness and contentment, and my skin started to tingle as I felt him getting closer. I opened my eyes in time to see him float up over the side of the roof.

"What are you doing up here?"

"Just enjoying the stars; it's really a beautiful night."

"What were you thinking about? You felt so fulfilled."

"I was thinking about how alone I was before you and how grateful I am to have you in my life now. I'm so ready to put all of this behind us so I can see my family and friends again and so we can really start our life together—whatever that looks like." He sat down next to me and stroked my cheek before cupping it in his hand. "You are such an incredible, strong woman. I'm the one that's lucky to have you in my life." He pulled me into his lap and gave me a sweet but passionate kiss.

"Did you really mean what you said earlier, about possibly becoming a Vampire someday?"

"Yes. I want to stay with you forever. I can't ever imagine leaving you here."

"Are you sure? You've been so adamant about me never changing you no matter the circumstances. I was starting to think I really was going to have to watch you die someday."

"Partially I was scared of what being anything what human would mean for me, but now that I'm not really human anyways it doesn't seem like that big of a deal."

"Would you be upset if you lost all of your new powers?"

"Of course not. The only reason I'm even half-way ok with all this is because it means I can protect everyone I love a while lot better. I'll still be able to do that as a Vampire."

"What about not having a real family with children. Is that something you can really give up?"

"That doesn't really matter. I mean, after creating this bond it's not like I could have children even if I did stay mortal. I want to be with you. That's my choice, if you want me for that long."

He chuckled before pulling me into a huge hug. "I want you for as long as I exist." When he pulled back, his eyes were clouded with seriousness. "Even if that's only until tomorrow." I stroked his hair reassuringly and kissed his cheek.

"Don't worry so much. Everything will be fine. And after everything's done and I've had a chance to visit with my friends, then you're taking me on a nice vacation somewhere where it's warm and the nights are long." I reached my hand down between us stroking his member eliciting a small groan.

"Anything you want," he moaned as I continued to pump him slowly. "Anything for my Sookie." Dawn was quickly approaching, so I popped us both down to his—our—bedroom. Unfortunately, we didn't have enough time for sex, so I just licked and nibbled on him until we were both pained with desire. I needed at least to feel him inside me, so I straddled him and slowly lowered myself onto him, trying to enjoy each and every last tantalizing sensation he created inside me. Finally I leaned in and bit his neck hard enough to draw sweet blood as he tenderly sunk his fangs into my exposed neck. He came inside of me, the feeling of which also sent me floating into a roaring sea of bliss. "I love you," he whispered as the pull of day finally pulled him into the sleep of the dead. Before letting sleep claim me as well, I got a washrag from the bathroom and cleaned us off. I took my time admiring his body; it felt a little less odd when he was out for the day. His smell encompassed me and made me feel lightheaded and giddy; he always smelled so distinctively Eric; manly and woodsy. Curling into his side, I laid my head on his smooth, marble chest that was so perfect, it looked like it had been sculpted. Feeling happier than I had in weeks, I drifted to sleep in the arms of my Vampire, Viking, lover, bonded, fated, and best friend.

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Reviews make me write faster- it's the truth =K


	17. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY GUYS! I'm sorry...I never wanted to be one of those writers that took forever to update, but man life can be a bitch! I've been super sick this week and the past weeks have been crazy. The next couple weeks arn't looking any better but I had to get this to you! So here it is...face off with Queen Bitch =D

HEY GUYS! I'm sorry...I never wanted to be one of those writers that took forever to update, but man life can be a bitch! I've been super sick this week and the past weeks have been crazy. The next couple weeks arn't looking any better but I had to get this to you! So here it is...face off with Queen Bitch =D

Big thanks to my beta YoungBoho, she rocks! Big thanks to you guys and all your reviews- I love ya for it!

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9:30

9:32

9:34

9:35

' _I swear time has slowed down!'_

Looking at the clock every couple of minutes was not helping my anxiety. We were going to be in front of the Queen in less than half an hour now and I was nervous. Yes, I knew I could do this and that it had to be done, but that didn't stop me from worrying. Mainly I was just hoping Eric wouldn't get hurt or something.

"Having second thoughts?" came Pam's voice from across the kitchen.

"No. Just kinda stressed. If something happens to either of you because of me I wouldn't be able to forgive myself." She sat down across the table from me and remained extremely still. Her face looked like what I had started to associate with when she was trying to figure out how to communicate her true feelings. Vampires rarely rushed into talking about anything; perhaps because they practically had all the time in the world to do whatever they wanted. I sat quietly with her, enjoying the silent company while we each mulled over our heavy thoughts.

"I trust you. With Eric I mean . . . I trust you." Her pained expression and closed off body language said this was something that was very hard for her to be able to say. I reached across the table and took her hand in mine.

"Thanks. That means more to me than you know. I like you, Pam. We're going to be Vampire sisters someday, after all." She removed her hand from mine but returned my grin with a fangy one of her own. "I think I'll like you better as a Vampire; perhaps you won't be so emotional. And you won't put all of us in so much danger."

My eyes turned dark as tendrils of sadness snaked their way back inside me, wrapping their deadly holds of despair around my formerly happy heart. "Honestly, I wish I would have never met any of you and Hadley wouldn't have been such a blabber mouth. No matter how hard I try, I feel like I'm constantly putting people I love put in harm's way."

Eric's voice preceded him from down the hallway "I, for one, am extremely happy I met you, lover. Otherwise, I would still be stuck in the pain and loneliness a thousand years of living without a purpose can bring."

Pam rolled her eyes at his sentiment and went to get a True Blood from the fridge. Eric came over and scooped me up onto his lap. "We can still run away if you want."

"No. We're going to do this. We have to put this behind us .Everything will be fine."

"Hurry and get dressed then, and we'll leave." He pulled me close and tenderly kissed my forehead. My hair and makeup were already done so all that was left was slipping on my floor-length spaghetti strap red dress. It was a simple straight dress with a semi-long train and a plunging v-neck line cut all the way down to my naval. It fit my curves perfectly and made me look like the strong confident woman I felt like.

Glancing at the clock on the nightstand, I realized it was finally time for us to leave. I popped back up to the kitchen and blushed at the immediate click of my Vampire's fangs. "Lover, no one will be able to resist you with such an elegant dress framing your exquisite body."

"Thanks," I mumbled before he claimed my lips in a feverish kiss. My toes tingled, and my heart jumped in fear at the desperate way he was kissing me. After he pulled back, I rubbed my thumb over the worried creases in his brow. "This isn't a goodbye kiss. I promise." Ruefully, he smiled at me and gave me another hug. Our bond was flowing with equal amounts of passionate lust and anxiety. He smelled so delicious and looked amazing in his suit; all I wanted to do was take him back downstairs and make love to him until daybreak.

"Now is not the time you two. Get going before you piss her off anymore." I peeked around Eric's arm and gave Pam a quick wink.

"Show me where we're going." I told Eric. He nodded to me and projected the grounds of the Queen's palace. I grabbed his hand in mine and popped us both to the scene in his mind. We both opened our eyes to find the other staring back with deep love and devotion. No matter what, they couldn't take these feelings from us. We were meant to be together, and now that we'd finally figured that out, I wasn't going to let the Queen come between us. Still holding hands, we emerged from the woods and strolled up to the front gates of the palace. The images in Eric's head did not do the place justice. Her palace was massive and decked out in every way imaginable. I swore the very walls were made of gold. Places like this made me mad, though; she could probably feed all of Africa with the cost of this house.

None of the guards tried to stop us or even acknowledged our presence. Curious, I dipped into their minds to find they had been given strict instructions to let us pass but to make sure we didn't get back out. A lot of them were nervous about having to deal with Eric and were surprised that I was the one who had finally killed Andre. Many were hopeful they could have me after the Queen was through with whatever punishment we were doomed for.

I snickered at a few of them who went so far as to imagine gruesome scenes of me in bed with them. "Do you really think I'd want to be with you after I've had him?" I asked some of them while tilting my head toward Eric. Their eyes went wide, and they immediately averted their gazes, thinking that could close their minds from me. I laughed at their naïve assumptions.

Two very large Vampires guarded the entrance to where I assumed the Queen was waiting. My nerves had since past, and I was feeling confident, powerful, and lethal. The Queen had finally met her match, and I was actually excited to put her in her place. The big vamps nodded to us and opened the large doors to let us in. Not to my surprise, they followed us in and closed the doors behind them. A woman was sitting on the throne, drumming her fingers on the armrest, and I could only presume she was Sophie-Anne.

"It's three after ten, I don't like being made to wait." She fumed at us.

"Well I don't really care. I don't live by your rules or your schedule." The fury in her eyes was a raging fire, and the tension in the room went from being nonchalant to palpable.

"I've heard enough, you foolish brat. Do you really think I'm going to just let you walk out of here? You'll be lucky if I even let you live. As far as Eric, well he should make a nice evening snack for me." She said as she flippantly waved her hand toward us.

Eric crouched down in a fighting position while I stayed relaxed where I was. I wanted to giggle with euphoria as I felt the immense amount of power flow just beneath my skin. I sent calm to him throughout the bond but he shut the feelings out; he was in high alert Viking battle mode.

' _We'll be fine, don't worry.' I spoke into his mind._

' _I doubt we will be fine. You stay behind me and take as many as you can. I'll try to keep them at bay as long as possible until you can get us out of here alright?'_

' _I can take just as many as you, if not more, and I'm not leaving until I've made my point.'_

' _Don't be foolish! There's to many here to realistically fight.'_

' _I'm glad you have so much faith in_ me' I rolled my eyes and ended our conversation. Apparently Eric still didn't see me as the powerful equal I had become. He was going to see very soon just what his "weak" human could do.

"I'm sorry to disappoint you, but we will be leaving after I've had a little chat with you regarding your complete disrespect for people's private lives."

She snickered at me and slouched back in her throne. "That's the problem with you humans, you care too much. Makes it very easy to convince you to do things you never would. It's quite pathetic really."

"What are you talking about?" Eric's demanding voice was loud as it echoed of the large gold walls of the main room.

Sophie-Anne was before him in a flash and slapped him hard against the cheek. Luckily she wasn't planning on doing anything else to him or I would have had to hurt her.

"Don't you dare speak to me Northman! You are a disgrace and betrayer of your own kind! You lied to me, evaded punishment, and took a human I had claim to." She snarled at him, baring fangs, before going and sitting back on her throne.

"I've had enough of this. Kill Northman, leave the girl."

At least fifty Vampires came running toward us, but they never made it all the way. With the ease of blowing a dandelion, I put a shield up around both Eric and I and watched in glee as every single Vampire went flying off of us and slammed into the walls around the room.

Sophie-Anne's and Eric's eyes grew wide at what they had just witnessed. With absolute grace ,I glided toward her keeping my gaze locked onto hers.

"No, Sophie, it's you who are being foolishly immature."

She raced toward me, but I used my telekinesis to throw her back onto her throne. The other Vampires had regained their bearings and were hovering around their Queen. Eric was still standing behind me, unsure of how to act. The bond was overflowing with surprise and appreciation. I looked at him over my shoulder and gave him a wink. Maybe now he would realize just how powerful I'd become. Returning my gaze back to Sophie, I opened the doors to her mind and walked into the most awful and revolting mind I'd been in yet. The things she had done to innocent people, Vampires, and all other kinds of supernatural beings. Shock erupted through me as her most recent memories flushed to the surface.

"Did you really think I wouldn't take some precautions? I haven't lived for so long for no reason. I told you humans cared too much. Although you're not entirely human are you?"

Rage boiled up in me at the gruesome images she was projecting to me. My brother was being held somewhere and tortured. I watched as Sophie herself tore into my brother's flesh over and over again oblivious to his cries of pain. Another scene played of Sophie watching on in twisted pleasure while another Vampire beat him with all sorts of torture devices. I peered at her through the tears that were streaming down my face.

"You just made a serious mistake." I growled at her through gritted teeth. Without really thinking of what I was doing ,I popped down to where her mind had shown me and quickly disposed of the ten Vampires with a knife that was laying on the table to my right. The room I was in looked much like the torture chamber in the compound where Eric had been held. It had the same stench of blood and death. Strapped to the table in the center of the room was Jason.

I ran over to him only to find he was unconscious. Thankfully, I could still see the faint rise and fall of his chest, but that was the only sign he was still alive. There were gashes all over his body and several fang marks that explained his extreme pallor. His eyes were sunk in to the point where I could see the tiny veins running out from them. I put his hand in mine only to cry even harder seeing that all his fingernails had been pulled from their nail bed.

"Oh, Jason." I sobbed into his chest. I popped us both back to the main room where Eric was standing as Vampires continually tried to get through my shield. I was overjoyed that my recent power boost had let me keep him protected when I wasn't even in the room. Everything was in absolute chaos with Vampires recklessly throwing themselves into my shields trying to find a weakness. The Queen was screaming at us and at her posse, extremely upset at how the events were unfolding.

"Enough!" I screamed and forced everybody to stop, holding them still with my mind.

I walked up to the Queen and slapped her as hard as I could across the cheek, throwing my powers into it, too. She winced and opened her mouth to say something, but I wouldn't let her.

"You Vampires act so mighty, but all you're doing is covering up your evil and hateful personalities behind the power you're blessed with. You choose to destroy everything, but I'm going to let you know here and now that I'm using mine to protect those I love at all costs. I don't want to start a war Sophie-Anne, but I want to be left alone. Unless . . . Eric, I never thought to ask- do you want to be King?"

Eric looked surprised, and the bond was ringing with disbelief. "No, I don't want that responsibility right now." I nodded my understanding with a smile and turned my attentions back to the Queen.

"Well then, since my bonded doesn't want your job, I suppose it's your choice if you live or die. What will it be?" I released her so she could talk.

"Obviously, I underestimated you. What are you?"

I leaned in close and slammed my hand down on the armrest of the chair.

"I want an answer now."

"I'll leave you and your family alone. You have my oath as royalty."

"And Eric is to be reinstated as Sheriff of Area 5. Regardless of everything that's happened, you know he's the best Sheriff you have, and it was idiocy to try and get rid of him in the first place."

She glared at me and spoke through gritted teeth. "Yes, I agree that would be a good idea."

"Good." I leaned within a few inches of her face. "And if you ever try to go back on your oath, I will kill you. Let me show you how easy it is for me." I turned around and started to set all the Vampires besides Sophie and Eric on fire as if they were being burned by the sun. The sound of their collective skin sizzling and their screams was deafening. The sickening smell of burnt flesh filled the room before they all burst into flames and became a pile of ashes on the floor.

When I turned back around to Sophie-Anne, she actually looked scared, which was the final confirmation I needed to know that she wouldn't come after me anymore. "Do you understand?"

"Yes . . . I swear, I won't go back on my word. Please . . . please leave now." Calmly, I turned around and waltzed back down to my lover.

"Are you ready to go home?" He smiled at me and offered his elbow. I reached up and kissed his cheek before interlocking my arm with his and resting my other hand on Jason's shoulder. I popped us straight to the Shreveport hospital and got Jason checked in. I was feeling jittery after all the excitement, so I glamored the nurses and doctor to not ask questions about what happened and to just treat my brother. I refused to leave the hospital before I could see him, so Eric and I camped out in the waiting room, which I hated. Hospital waiting rooms brought back all the memories of the times I'd been here from Vampire-related injuries. It also smelled too sterile, which gave me the creeps.

After sitting in the waiting room for a while, Eric finally broke the silence that had been lingering between us. I could tell something was bothering him, but I wasn't going to push him to talk to me.

"I don't even know what to say. A thousand years and I've certainly never experienced anything like that. I didn't even have to lift a finger," he frowned at me.

"Are you upset I didn't let you fight?"

"Well . . . yes."

I chuckled and gave his hand a squeeze while taking in his familiar scent. "Can't take that I'm just as powerful as you now, baby?"

"You're more powerful than I am. I've never seen any supe so talented. I should have trusted you more."

I smiled at his attempt at an apology. "I have a feeling you have new abilities, too. I didn't get crazy like this until we formed a bond. I was pretty limited before, but now I feel like the possibilities are endless. We'll just have to wait and see."

"I thought tonight was finally going to be my last," he whispered. Our bond was filled with sadness, unconditional love, and confusion, so I sent as much warmth and happiness as possible.

"We weren't fated for no reason. I still don't know what that is, and maybe it's not til hundreds of years in the future, but I just got you, and I'm not letting you go ever again."

Peace settled between us in the silence of the next few moments. He pulled me onto his lap and cradled me in his arms. I was surprised he was willing to be so affectionate with me in public. We couldn't have his reputation ruined.

' _I love you.'_ He thought to me.

' _Mmm . . . I love you, too.'_ I thought, leaning into his embrace. The truth was that I was completely worn out. It had been a trying day, and while I wasn't really human, I still needed sleep to recuperate. Just as my eyes drifted closed, Eric started nudging me awake. Frustrated, I grumbled at him to let me rest.

"The doctor's here, lover," he whispered in my ear. I snapped my eyes open and sat up, trying to focus on the figure standing in front of me clad in the traditional white doctor's robe.

"Is he going to be alright?" I shrilled, praying there was no serious damage.

"He's fine, Ms. Stackhouse. He'll need to stay awhile to make sure there's no infection, but you're welcome to see him now."

We got to the hospital room to find Jason was awake but obviously groggy from all the pain medication.

"Hey there, how're you feeling?" I asked, gently taking his hand in mine.

"I'm okay, sis. How did I get here? Nobody knows anything."

"Well, it's a long story and I'll tell you all about it, but for now, you need to rest so you can get better."

"I'm already feeling a lot better, actually. I hope you kicked all those Vampire's asses."

"Of course I did."

"They've been taken care of and won't be bothering you or your sister again." Jason looked Eric up and down, still unsure whether he liked the big Viking or not, especially with what he'd just been through via Vampire hands.

"How about you rest now. Do you want me to stay with you?"

"No, Sook I'm fine. You look just about as bad as I do. Go home and get some rest, but come see me in the morning and bring me something good to eat. Okay?" Jason was always looking for a good meal. Sometimes I thought it had been the only thing keeping him connected to Gran or me since he moved out.

"No problem. I'll bring your favorite." I bent over and kissed him on the forehead before Eric and I left the room.

Outside, I turned to Eric and wrapped my arms around his waist. "Let's go home your style." His strong arms encircled me before he leapt from the ground and took off toward home. While flying, I relaxed into his hold and enjoyed the wind blowing through my hair.

After we landed, I took us straight into the sword room, called my ipod to me, and plugged it into the dock in the corner. Seductively, I walked back over to him and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"Won't you dance with me? All dressed up like this and nothing to do seems wrong."

He let out an unnecessary sigh of contentment and wrapped his long arms around my back. Using my powers, I turned the ipod on play to"A Moment Like This" by Kelly Clarkson. The entire evening had been a whirlwind, and I felt like we needed time to be together and accept that we were finally safe.

"You've been quiet all night, are you sure you're okay?"

He squeezed me tighter and rested his chin on my head before answering. "I'm alright. I've just been processing everything."

"Things have changed a lot tonight. Is that ok?"

"Of course it's alright." He pushed me back to arms length and regarded me with a serious look. "In one night, you've saved our lives, kept us together without having to run away, forced the Queen to extend her protection, saved your brother, and got me reinstated as Sheriff. You're incredible and I wouldn't have it any other way. I've just been readjusting myself to the new changes and deciding on new strategies now that the game has changed."

Tears threatened to spill at his sweet words. I was so relieved and happy that even though our dynamic had changed, he was still just as committed to me and to _us_. "Well how about you stop thinking for a little while, and let's just enjoy that things turned out okay." He smiled at me before whisking me into his arms and raising us into the air for a floating dance. It was wonderful, romantic, and needed after our long frantic day. Our bond was singing with love, affirmation, and contentment.

After the song ended, Eric held us up in the air a little bit.

"So I have a theory, Lover. Would you like to hear it?" I turned my head sideways and gave him a confused look urging him to continue.

"I think if you're telekinetic, you should be able to move yourself. Which means you could fly with me. I'm going to let you go of you. Try it." Quite embarrassingly, I reacted like a five-year-old, who was just told there weren't training wheels on their bike anymore; I grabbed Eric tighter and burrowed my head into his chest.

"We are a good five feet off the ground, and you will _not_ let go of me!"

His boisterous laugh filled the room. Even though I was scared, I still smiled at the sound. He'd been so deep in thought all night that I hadn't heard his beautiful laugh in quite some time; it was like music to my soul. "So you're willing to go up against a Vampire Queen but you're not willing to try flying? You're so ridiculous at times." Still so human was what he meant I think.

"Fine I'll try, but from the ground going up, not starting in the air already." He rolled his eyes but lowered us to the floor. Trying not to think too much, I directed my power toward the will to move myself. Eric (as usual) was right and I started to drift off the floor. Feeling exhilarated, I tried focusing on where I wanted to go and how fast. With ease, I was flying about the room; it was such a different experience doing it myself rather than having Eric hold me. I landed next to him and stood still for a moment.

"Wow. That was freaking awesome! I don't know why you don't fly everywhere!"

"Because being able to fly is quite unique and it's not something I want everyone to know. Let's go to sleep now. You haven't been thoroughly fucked yet today and that is unacceptable." Playfully, I swatted his chest, but he could smell the arousal his words stirred up in me. The bond had switched from being mellow and loving to an abyss of lust.

He grabbed my shoulders and quickly closed the distant between our mouths.

The thing about Eric's passionate kisses was that they didn't get sloppy in the heat of the moment like a regular guy's did. If anything, he was more precise and tempting when he was kissing without relent. It was enough to make any girl's head spin and her body weightless. With gentle force, he pushed me backward until my back slammed into the mirror. He stopped kissing me long enough to ravage my neck with little nips and kisses.

"That dress is far too beautiful on your body to ruin it, so I would suggest you remove it quickly." He whispered in my ear while shudders went through me at his obvious lack of control in the moment. I turned around and let him unzip the dress before taking my arms out of the straps and letting it fall to the ground. A loud groan escaped his throat when he saw I hadn't been wearing anything underneath the dress. His lips immediately started lathing my bare skin in licks and kisses that took my breath away. He pulled me away from the mirror, but kept us facing it so we could see ourselves. Eric pressed himself up against my back making me jump. At some point during our make-out session, he had divulged himself of clothes, and the proof of his arousal was pressed into my back.

"Look at us, Lover, look at how much we want each other, at how beautiful you are." In the mirror, my eyes met another unfamiliar pair. They were my own, but they were wild looking with passion and lust blazing inside. My hair was lightly tousled, and my face was flushed. There was a faint blue glow to my skin, hinting at the power inside me just waiting to be commanded. I followed the reflection up and saw the same wild look in Eric's eyes. As usual, even though I thought I couldn't get any wetter, the sight before me made more sticky-sweet liquid pool between my legs.

"Bring us a chair" he said roughly. I didn't understand why he wanted one, but in this aroused state, he could have asked for the world, and I would have found a way to give it to him. I called a chair from the kitchen into the room and he sat on it bringing me with him.

"Now you can watch how well I fuck you," he growled into my ear while gently lifting me a little before lowering me onto his very hard cock. I moaned as I saw myself in the mirror taking all he had to offer. He gripped my hips and started to ever so slowly grind in and out of me. The sensations he always created were amazing, but watching him do it was taking my senses to a completely new level of overload. I felt like I was being totally consumed by Eric. His familiar scent surrounded me, I could feel him moving at a tantalizing pace inside me, and I was watching first-hand the way my body responded to him.

"You're body has always wanted me like this. Can you see now why I always knew you'd be mine? Mmm, I just didn't know I would be yours too" Tingles crossed my skin as he reached one hand around and started not so gently pinching my nipples between two fingers. The pain mixed with the pleasure was making me crazy. Unable to stand it anymore, I put my feet down on the floor on each side of the chair and started making my own pace, slamming down on him as fast as possible. I just wanted more of him—all of him. He let his head roll back and moaned my name while I brought us both closer to our climaxes. I was so close to release when he grabbed my hips and forcefully shoved me down on himself, grinding his tip against my g-spot. I cried out in pleasure and grabbed his thighs in a death grip while I rode out the best orgasm of my life. His right hand came down and stroked my clit extending my pleasure for as long as possible.

After I felt like I could breathe again, I stopped for a moment and turned around so I was facing him. Straddling his lap I lowered myself on him once again, garnering a moan from both of us. I held his face in my hands and feverishly kissed his lips. "I love you," I said, setting a grueling pace once again.

"As I love you, _min älskling"_

I was close to another mind-bending orgasm and so was he, so I upped the pace while I wrapped my arms around him and clung to his upper body for support. A few more thrusts, and we were screaming each other's names without abandon. Not feeling the need to ruin the moment, we both sat still, holding each other and enjoying the post-orgasm rush.

"Ready for bed now?" I asked playfully.

"Of course not. This was just the appetizer. I still plan on having the main course and dessert." He proclaimed, picking me up and carrying me down to the day chamber.

"So I'm not thoroughly fucked yet then, huh?"

"No. Not until I say so." He said, licking his still extended fangs.

"I see, then you better get started, don't you think?"

He grinned at me, and no other words were spoken the rest of the night—other than the screams of pleasure neither of us could contain. Needless to say, by morning I was very much thoroughly fucked by both our admission. The next day's sleep was the best I'd had in months; everything was finally right with my still needed to figure out where to go from here and what exactly we were supposed to be fated for, but that could wait until tomorrow. Tonight was about finally being happy with my Viking.

* * *

So...was it what you were expecting? I know, I know...she didn't kill Sophie-Anne but I never planned on doing that from the beginning. How many "fated" stories have you read where Eric and Sookie get together, kill Sophie-Anne or Victor and they rule the world? Really? Not that those are bad but I told you mine wasn't going to be a cookie-cutter story ;) So what happens next? What do you think? R&R!


	18. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so this wasn't up by Monday-it was finished by Tuesday and my beta just got it back to me late last night and it needed a lot of stuff added to it. The good news is that it's 8,000 words wowza!

Ok, so this wasn't up by Monday-it was finished by Tuesday and my beta just got it back to me late last night and it needed a lot of stuff added to it. The good news is that it's 8,000 words wowza!

 **I've written a chapter for greenlemons story Never Judge A Lady By Her Lover.** If you guys haven't read that you def should! The character focus is Amelia. Every chapter is a lemon with a different partner written by a different fanfic author. Mine is a Amelia and Hadley pairing. It'll be up soon so please make sure to read and review it!

As always a huge thanks to my amazing beta, YoungBoho, for her help and encouragement. And a HUGE thankyou to all of you who left the best comments ever after the note I posted. You all really helped me get over my little writing funk and made this chapter turn out super amazing. 3

* * *

Pam was sulking. Again. Eric and I woke up the next night to find her standing at the edge of our bed with her hands on her hips and a death glare fixed on her delicate features.

"The next time you two decide to fuck before letting me know what's going on I'm going to have to kill something." She turned around and saucily walked up the stairs, flipping us the bird before disappearing. Perhaps I've been around Vampires too much the past couple weeks, or maybe I actually know Pam better, but I couldn't help but laugh at her. I knew in her own way she was saying how worried she had been about us and was angry we hadn't let her know we were ok. What could I say? When Eric started touching me all logical thoughts disappeared.

After Pam's interruption, we all moved to the sitting room and relayed the events of the night before. Once we were finished with the story, an awkward silence filled the room. Eric was drinking a True Blood deep in thought while Pam sulked in the corner. I'm used to Vampires being quiet, but the tension in the room was making me feel uncomfortable. After everything we'd been through together, I didn't want Pam angry at me.

"Look, I'm sorry we didn't talk to you last night. Everything happened so fast and it was kind of crazy." She just gave me a vehement looked and stared off into the corner.

"Fine, be like that," I scowled at her before going into the kitchen and fixing myself some breakfast. I was ready to move on with everything and get started with my new life. I wasn't really sure what that was though. Eric hadn't actually asked me to stay with him, so I probably needed to go back to my own home and make sure everything was okay. Plus, I had to find a new job; I was pretty certain Sam would take me back, but I didn't know if I wanted to be a waitress any longer. I also needed to see everybody and make sure they knew I was still alive and well.

"What are you thinking about?" I looked up to see Eric's icy blue gaze fixed on me with a worried look on his face.

"Everything. Trying to figure out where we go from here. I suppose I need to go home now that everything is taken care of, and I need to find a job." I sighed loudly, letting my shoulders slouch. There really was a lot to take care of now that the Queen wasn't trying to kidnap me.

"You are home, and you will not be working for the shifter anymore," he said with absolute authority while taking a seat across the table from me.

"Since when do you get to tell me what to do?"

His lips turned up into a grin as he leaned in close to my face. "Since always."

The independent women in me whipped out her talons and went into battle mode. "I'm sorry, but who just saved all our butts? That would be me, so you can stick is where the sun don't shine."

"I really don't understand what you're talking about, but I'm certain I've saved 'your butt' plenty of times, along with the rest of you."

He was right, but I didn't feel like admitting it. Much to my chagrin, the defiant Sookie had raised her head and there was no shoving it back down. "Maybe. That still doesn't give you a right to boss me."

I huffed at him and stuck out my lower lip. His reaction was to laugh at me, which only made me that much angrier.

"You can be so obstinate. I only tell you what to do because I know what's best for you."

He wasn't making me feel any better, and the thought of making him sizzle a little crossed my mind.

"I am not a child! I can make decisions for myself."

"I know that." That wasn't the answer I expected, so I closed my mouth and thought about what he was trying to say to me.

"If you think I'm capable of making decisions for myself, then why have you always forced me to do things your way?"

"Because I've been around for much longer than you. I understand things better and have a broader world view. You told me yourself that I got to be so old by being cunning and ruthless. So wouldn't you want to trust me with your well-being?"

I hated when he was right. How was I supposed to argue that logic? He did know a lot more that I did, he had actually been through most of the things I'd read in a history book.

"Ok, so maybe you're right, but you could be nicer about it. We're equals remember? I promise to actually consider your advice if you will give it to me instead of dictating how things should go."

"Hmm . . . are we compromising?"

"Yes, do you have a problem with that?"

"Not with you."

I smiled at him and moved to sit on his lap. I let my head rest on his shoulder, soaking in the warmth and love I felt in the moment.

"So did you just officially ask me to move in with you?"

He surveyed the surrounding room that had broken picture frames and dishes scattered around the floor before his gaze landed back on me. "Of course we will be together. We're bonded for eternity now, and I'd rather never be apart from you. However, this house is in need of major repairs. We can either buy a new one or we can stay at yours while this one is being fixed, it's your choice."

I didn't want to live anywhere with Eric but in his house. There were so many memories here that I didn't want to part with. I knew that was ridiculously sentimental and so "human" but I didn't care. When I thought of my future with him, it was here.

"I like this place. I want to stay here after it's fixed. Are you sure my house will be safe enough to stay at?"

"I'll want to make some renovations such as light tight windows, but then it should be fine."

I smiled wide and wrapped my arms around his neck. There were times I still couldn't believe that I was loved by Eric Northman. When I first met him, I never would have guessed he could be so sweet and understanding. I had a feeling I'd never get over the seemingly impossible way we ended up together.

' _So can I get a job?'_ I asked mentally, too afraid to voice my request aloud again.

"Of course you can, but you're far too good a women to do something like serve drunken men. You need a job that's more suitable to your position."

"My position?" I questioned while sitting up to look in his eyes.

"You are the bonded of a very old and powerful Vampire. What do you think it says about yourself or me if you perform such menial tasks for others?" I hadn't really thought about it that way, but he was right—as usual. Waitressing was something I was good at, but it wasn't what I was meant for anymore.

"What do you think I should do then?"

"For now, you can help me and Pam run Fangtasia if you like. If you think of something you would like to try, I'll do everything in my power to make it happen for you."

"That sounds good to me. Where is Pam, by the way?" I hadn't really thought of it before, but she hadn't followed Eric into the kitchen, and I didn't hear her anywhere else in the house.

"She left to start getting the club ready for this evening. We should consider leaving sometime as well. We're going to announce my return this evening, and I also want to announce you officially as my bonded after everything has been explained."

Excitement bubbled up in me at the thought of Eric admitting our relationship to someone other than to Pam or me. I didn't count the Queen because that was sort of forced out of him. I was nervous, too, though; I had a feeling several Vampires wouldn't like the idea of their Sheriff being bonded. Not to mention the thralls of pissed off fangbangers that would want me dead for somehow making Eric monogamous. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all.

"There's nothing to worry about. Everyone will love you or I'll cut off their head, okay?"

I couldn't help but let my worries go and laugh at him. There was no doubt in my mind that he really would chop off anyone's head who tried to hurt me.

"What about my powers? Sophie-Anne knows about me but should anyone else? Maybe it would keep everyone away from me."

"No. You may be powerful, but if the supernatural community sees you as too much of a threat, then they will stop at nothing to find and exploit your weaknesses in order to bring you down. Let's do everything we can not to bring attention to your new gifts."

I frowned at him, feeling frustrated that I couldn't let people know who I was. It felt like the whole telepathic thing all over again: keeping secrets and feeling like a freak. At least this time, I was a freak who could kick their ass if they messed with me, but it was still annoying.

We sat in the kitchen holding each other until Eric insisted we get ready to go out for the evening. I was feeling like a bundle of nerves by the time I finished my shower. Even my lavender body scrub couldn't soothe away my anxiety. My hand was shaking so much, I slipped while putting on my eyeliner and had to redo the makeup on that entire eye. When I was finally ready to go, I felt like nothing more than a puddle of nerves and bundle of frustration.

' _I can feel you working yourself up. You need to stop that. Everything will be fine._ ' Eric sent an overload of love, safety, and peace into the bond, immediately calming me and giving me courage to face everyone at Fangtasia. Besides, I would have Eric with me, and I already knew I could accomplish anything for or with him.

As I was walking out into the bedroom to get dressed, Eric rushed into me at Vampiric speed and shoved me against the wall. My heartbeat sped up and my body started to ache for him.

"You are mine and everyone will know it," he hissed in my ear before slamming his lips to mine. How this man could take me from zero to sixty in a second was beyond me; I just held on for the ride. Scratching my nails down his back, I bit his lower lip drawing a little blood. He groaned into my mouth, encouraging me to jump up and wrap my legs around his back.

Our bond was telling me he was anxious to get going, but there was no way I was letting him stop after getting me all worked up. I nuzzled my face into his neck and bit down as hard as I could, eliciting a cry of surprise and excitement from him. Eric's sticky sweet blood flowed from the wound, so I quickly started licking it up before it closed up. It makes me laugh thinking about the days I used to think drinking blood was disgusting. Eric's blood was intoxicating, addicting, and all mine.

With each pull from his neck, I could feel his resolve slipping away and our passion for each other increase ten fold

"You're going to be the death of me, woman," he growled before throwing me onto the bed and climbing on top of me.

"Then I'll have to make sure I'm worth it."

Fangs peaked out from underneath his lip as he gave me a sweet yet sexy smirk. "You already have," he said, making my heart melt and my libido spike. He ran two fingers in between us searching to see if I was ready for him; of course I was—one look from the man and my panties were ruined. At his first touch, I lost my breath, and my back involuntarily arched, my body frantically searching for more friction with him.

"Mmm, so wet for me. All mine." He whispered as he trailed light kisses down my neck to the sensitive buds my nipples had become. Gently, he stroked my clit while slowly circling my breasts with his tongue.

I was lost in him—his smell, his touch, the things he could do to my body. Retreating from the girls, he kissed over my stomach raising goose bumps on the sensitive skin and continued over my hips down one leg. He was careful not to come too close to my mound, making me squirm in frustration and anticipation.

While he kissed back up that leg his other hand ran up and down the length of my body, still not touching me where I wanted it most.

"You're driving me crazy," I hissed at him through clenched teeth.

He looked up at me and grinned before scraping his fangs from my belly button down to just above my clit. I grabbed the blankets and held on for dear life, trying not to climb out of my own skin.

"That's the point," he said before continuing on his mission to cover inch of my body with his lips. He kissed down the other leg and back up while his other hand reached up and gruffly pinched and rolled my nipple between his fingers. I wasn't expecting the intense contact, and I almost came just from that. My entire body felt like a loose electrical wire jumping around everywhere; I was tense and on sensory overload trying to figure out where he was going to touch me next.

Without warning, Eric was right on top of me pushing himself in to the hilt. I screamed and he groaned from the sudden relief of being consumed by each other. Neither of us was in the mood to take things slow, so he flipped me over and pounded into me relentlessly while I hung onto the headboard crying his name with each thrust. After being teased for so long, it didn't take much time for a raging fire to build inside me. Just as I was about to explode, Eric flipped me over and bit into my neck, sending both of us reeling with immeasurable pleasure.

Afterward, tremors shook through my body for a good ten minutes as I laid underneath my Viking. I knew we should get up and go to Fangtasia, but I couldn't bring myself to leave him just yet. "I want to do that again," I admitted, no longer feeling shy about asking him for what I wanted.

He rolled us over so I was lying on his chest. Automatically, I nuzzled my head into the crook of his shoulder that seemed meant for me and wrapped my leg around his. A low growl rumbled in his chest as he kissed the top of my head.

"You know I would like nothing more than to stay here and fuck you forever, but Pam really might do something irrational if we don't show up tonight. I must perform my duties as Sheriff and ensure my people are kept safe and prosperous." The bond was filled with worry and apprehension. I couldn't understand where it was coming from so I, quite ashamedly, poked into his mind. He was thinking about the times he hadn't been there for me, not because he didn't want to be, but because his Sheriff responsibilities wouldn't permit it. He was scared that I wouldn't understand the huge amount of time that went into his job on a regular basis.

"Why would you think that? I know we haven't been together while you've been Sheriff, but I knew we weren't going to get to hang out all the time after this was fixed. I love and support you, though. If there's nights where you're stuck doing paper work or something, I'll understand."

Relief and pride filled the bond as his arms wrapped around me and squeezed me tight. "You're so incredible. I have been worried how you would handle me getting heavily involved in Vampire politics again."

I straddled him and put my hands on his chest. "While you were cursed, do you remember when you asked me to sit on the throne beside you at Fangtasia?"

"Yes."

"I don't know if you remember the intent behind it then or not, but when you offered your hand to me, I knew what it meant. It wasn't about me letting you in, it was asking if I could stand by your side. Be yours when it meant that I had to become a major part of your world."

Recognition lit his eyes, and a huge smile appeared on his face. "You sat with me that night."

"Yes, I did, and I always will." I lowered myself onto his chest and kissed him deeply, letting my devotion and loyalty pour out into the bond. When I pulled back, there was a small red dot at the side of his eyes. Deciding to act like a vampire, I licked up each bit of blood, savoring the tangy sweetness on my tongue.

"I still need to ask something of you."

"Anything." It was true; I would do anything for him. He meant everything to me, and I was more than happy spending the rest of my days giving him anything he wanted.

"When we're at the club or before other Vampires in general, you can't undermine me in any way. It's extremely important the Vampires in my area respect and fear me. Honestly, being bonded is going to weaken my reputation as it is. If they thought you had me . . . what is that human term? Oh, yes, whipped. If they thought you had me whipped, then things could get ugly for the both of us."

I wasn't exactly sure how I felt about that. It made sense in one way because not very many Vampires saw being bonded a good thing. On the other hand, it kind of made me feel like the submissive pet.

"So what exactly would I have to act like around you?"

"You can be yourself, but I can't be like this with you unless we are alone. And you must never try my authority."

"I've done that before, though."

"Yes and many were surprised I didn't kill you on the spot. Now that you're my bonded, they will expect for me to have subdued you."

"But, you haven't."

A loud roll of laughter bubbled up from his chest. "Of course I haven't, I doubt I ever will. But they can't know that. For both our safety, alright?"

I still wasn't sure about all this, but Eric had been right earlier; I had to trust his judgment. He had been a Vampire and in their politics for _much_ longer than I had been. It was time I stopped acting like an indignant child and actually trusted him like I claimed to.

"Okay. I trust you." He beamed at me and gave me a long passionate kiss.

"Let's go before I fuck you again and Pam hurts a waitress." He pinched my butt, emphasizing his point.

"Ouch!" I screeched while swatting his chest. Leaving our bedroom was the last thing I wanted to do, but I got off him and put on the outfit I planned to wear for the evening. It was a black pair of slacks, a tight red boustie, and red "fuck-me" heels. It was a perfect combination of professional and slut. Just what being a manager at Fangtasia required. Eric wore a pair of black slacks as well with a black wife-beater tank. We both took in the other and licked our lips.

"You're making it hard for me not to fuck you again." He emphasized the word hard making my insides clench together again.

"Well, you're making me want you to take all this off. I'm not wearing any underwear you know." Poor choice of words when we were trying to leave. His fangs came back down and he jumped on top of me, sending both of us clattering to the floor. It was the reaction I wanted, but I knew we needed to leave, so I held onto him and popped us both to his office. Eric stood up looking confused.

"Why are we here?" he asked impatiently.

"Because you were about to tear my clothes off, and I couldn't be responsible for the death of someone."

"It was your fault," he growled at me. I giggled and patted his ass before walked out into the main part of the bar. Pam saw me and relief flooded her features. She walked over to me and I noticed she was dressed up in a halter red leather dress. She smelled really good too–—sweet and irresitable almost.

"Have a date, Pam? You smell really nice." She rolled her eyes at me, but I noticed how they lingered for just a second on a man sitting at the corner of the bar. He was tall with dark hair and deep-set eyes. He was also boring holes into Pam and looking like he wanted to devour her.

"What's his name?" I asked nonchalantly, nodding my head to the guy at the bar.

"Just the vermin of the evening. I would ask what took you two so long to get here, but it smells like you took a bath inside Eric; he's covering every inch of you. And fang marks to go with it, trying to prove a point is he?"

I reached up and touched my neck to find she was right; I did have two tiny little fangs marks from where he bit me earlier. He'd never purposely left a mark before. That kind of made me angry, since it was obvious from Pam's reaction that he was trying to mark his territory.

' _Calm down! He's just trying to protect us. He knows what he's doing. He knows what he's doing.'_ I kept repeating that to myself until I felt the anger start to dissipate. Besides, what did it matter if he was showing off I was his? That's what I wanted in the first place; I just didn't expect it like this. I should be insanely proud to be here marked as his, even if it did make me feel like a piece of property. He was old, powerful, sexy as hell, and he wanted me. Big girl panty time.

I could feel Eric walking up behind me, and the entire room went into a hush. I opened up my mind to find most of them were absolutely thrilled he was back. Everyone thought Pam, while effective, was a total bitch and they'd missed him. The fangbangers were all trying to figure out how they could be the first one to be with him. Their willingness to do literally anything for sex with him was appalling and disgusting; they truly had no self worth. How any Vampire could stand to be around them was lost on me. I know to them sex and blood is fine from anybody, but even they had to have some sort of standards!

Without looking anyone in the eye, he grabbed my hand and pulled me over to where his throne still sat. Pam must have never had it removed; she knew he'd be back some way or another. He gracefully lowered his massive frame into the huge throne and brought me down to his lap.

His authoritative voice filled the room; each person was captivated by his power and hung on every word that escaped his lips. "I've been gone for some time resolving issues with our Queen. Pam was instated as Sheriff during my absence and I commend her for keeping my area in perfect working order. As it turns out, our famed telepath here belonged to Sophie-Anne without my knowledge. For obvious reasons, I vied to keep her among our retinue in order to make us the most prosperous and valuable area in Louisiana. I have succeeded and made her my bonded to ensure she never leaves us again." Several gasps went up among the crowd along with many nods of appreciation and awe at his ability to secure me from the Queen.

"I introduce to you my bonded, our telepath, and your new mistress: Sookie Stackhouse." Vampires started lining up and bowing beneath my feet pledging their loyalty to me. Though Eric's version of the past two weeks was nothing but a fabrication, it was truly genius. Instead of the Vampire's thinking less of Eric or hating me, they only worshipped him further for securing such a valuable "asset" for their area. I have to say, I was slightly disappointed this wasn't the proclamation of his love for me I thought it might be, but it still felt good to have our relationship out in the open.

My predictions were right about one thing though; the fangbangers were absolutely livid. Most of them were thinking that he better not only be sleeping with me or heads were going to roll. One of them had the nerve to come up and offer herself to him with me still on his lap. She literally crawled up the stairs and stretched out her neck to him.

I didn't know what overcame me, but I kicked her in the face. It wasn't until then that I realized Eric's anger was flowing into me as well, which was probably what caused to me overreact. I looked at him and gave a look that said sorry, but he only waved for Pam to come over and get rid of her. She tried to put up a fight clawing at Pam to get away and come after me, but it obviously wasn't worth it, Pam was much stronger than her.

Several Vampires lifted an eye at my behavior but didn't say anything. The DJ yelled something about not letting the party stop and cranked the music up to its normal ear deafening level. Everyone started to dance and get drinks from the bar leaving Eric and I finally alone on his throne. It amazed me how he always looked the same on his throne; powerful, bored, and sexy-as-hell. Feeling frisky, I slipped my hand behind me and started stroking him through his slacks. My attempt at mirroring Eric's cool façade utterly failed as I couldn't help but smile at the small moan that escaped his lips. I loved knowing I could make him lose control no matter the situation.

One of the Vampires approached us forcing me to stop my impromptu hand job.

"Sheriff, I wanted to express my congratulations at finally taming the bitch." He nodded to me as he spoke, the hate in his eyes evident.

"Having such an asset is quite a rarity. I was worried before that she would never understand her place as a vermin and servant to you. It seems she's become quite the nice little pet. If you loan her out please consider me interested."

Burning rage and hatred for this Vampire consumed me. I stood off Eric's lap getting ready to confront him and use my powers if necessary; no one talked to me like that!

' _Sookie, don't.'_ Eric thought very loudly in my head.

' _I can't let him get away with talking about me like that!'_

' _Do you trust me?'_

Every time he asked that question I said yes and he had yet to let me down. I'd agreed to play the submissive role and I couldn't afford to fail.

"I'll let you two talk business." I said, doing my best to not appear angry as I walked down the platform and to his booth in the corner. Feeling angry out of my mind I flagged down a waitress and had her bring my usual gin and tonic. For several minutes I sat slowly drinking the alcohol, trying to calm myself down. Tears stung the corners of my eyes but I refused to let them fall here.

' _Sookie.'_

My head snapped up to meet Eric's gaze. He motioned for me to come sit with him again, the other Vampire had left. Part of me felt like telling him to fuck off after what had just happened, but I knew that wasn't acceptable behavior. With only the resolve to keep my promise, I rejoined Eric on his throne. He gently traced circles on my arm, but that only made me angrier.

' _Don't touch me. I'm mad at you.'_

' _For what?_

' _You know what.'_

' _Not killing him for disrespecting you?'_

' _Yes.'_

' _Until you are Vampire they will never accept you. We talked about this; I can't let them think I have given you total freedom or they won't believe I'm capable of being Sheriff. However, I did make sure Mickey knew you were not to be talked about in such a perverse manner and that I wouldn't be sharing.'_

' _Oh, I feel so much better.'_

' _This world has always been your choice. You may leave now if you like.'_

I took a deep breath and let out a long sigh. He was right, it was my choice and I already knew what that decision was; I just didn't realize exactly how hard it would be on me. Closing my eyes I reached for the bond and let it cover me in its safety. I could really feel his love for me inside it; I tried concentrating on that instead of everything that was going on around me.

' _I love you. '_

' _I love you too. Can I touch you now?'_

' _I guess so.'_

He started massaging my neck, shoulders, and back making me relax and lean into his touch. In seconds his skillful hands had me moaning at the relief he was giving my tense muscles. Shivers went down my spine when I felt his cool breath by my ear.

"If you keep making those sounds I'm not going to be able to keep from fucking you."

Involuntarily, I licked my lips and rubbed my legs together seeking some friction.

"I don't see that as such a bad thing."

"You're right, but I should sit here a little longer and you're making that difficult."

I knew it was important for him to be in front of everyone but my libido didn't care. I spent the next several minutes trying not to squirm on his lap. Feeling annoyed I decided to play dirty and get even. I replayed our first time together in the shower and all the following nights of passion in my head and projected them to Eric. He shifted underneath me whispering a few curses under his breath. Taking advantage of a fantasy I knew he had I sent the image of me bent over his desk in the white dress I wore the first night here.

His hands came around and gripped my thighs tightly. "Promise me we can do that sometime soon, and we won't stay out here much longer."

"I promise. Perhaps I'll even throw in something extra." I envisioned myself on my knees taking all of him in my mouth with the dress pulled down to reveal my breasts.

"One more hour and we'll go to my office."

An hour seemed like to long a wait but I didn't really have a choice. The rest of the night passed pretty quickly. Nothing really happened besides a few more Fangbangers approached us, but Eric dismissed all of them with a wave of the hand. Eventually, Pam came over to tell us everyone was whispering about Eric not accepting offers from anyone else; he was known to be quite the stud after all. He rolled his eyes and slouched back in the throne. The bond told me that he was as annoyed as he looked. It reminded me of the time I forced him to tell me why he wanted to bond with me; he was trying to decide how to explain himself and he didn't like having to do it.

The next fangbanger that came over was much more brave in her approach and even touched Eric's hand. It took all my control not to kick this one in the face, too. Eric's large hand wrapped around her wrist and squeezed tight, causing the pathetic girl to whimper in pain. He leaned around me and pulled her close to his face. Everyone in the club had settled down and was watching the interaction between them take place. "I want to make it clear that I will not be taking anyone who offers because I have the finest delicacy you could ever image. Look at my bonded. She is powerful, she is ripe, and she has the sweetest blood I have ever tasted in my thousand years. You," he said as his eyes left hers and scanned all the fangbangers in the crowd "taste like trash compared to her." He threw her to the ground and went back to scanning the crowd.

All the Vampires in the room now were looking at me like I was a piece of meat, so I looked at the girl still lying on the floor crying and decided to peer into her mind. She had lost her parents two months ago and was on the decline ever since. They had always been the ones to keep her on the straight and narrow and she didn't have anyone without them. She had come to Fangtasia tonight seeking someone, anyone to pay her attention and love her. Now she felt ashamed and guilt ridden with what they would think of her now. She wanted to die and escape the mess her life had become.

My heart lurched for her. I knew what it was like to lose your parents. I don't know what would have happened to me and Jason if we didn't have Gran. Slowly, I got off Eric's lap and walked down to the girl. When she saw me coming, she started crying more and begged me not to hurt her. It was then that I realized I had to stop judging these people. Not all fangbangers were bad, just like not all Vampires were bad. I vowed to myself not to lose all my compassion just because I was a "supe" now—not even if I became a Vampire.

With tenderness, I bent down and helped her to her feet. I wiped the tears from her eyes and brushed the hair from her wet cheeks.

"What's your name?"

"Diane" she said in-between sobs.

"I lost my parents, too Diane. They died in a flood when I was very little. I know what it's like to feel lost and confused."

Her eyes were wide as saucers at me being nice to her and knowing what she was thinking about. "I just don't know what to do. I came here tonight to either go home with someone or to ensure I didn't go home at all. They would be so upset with me."

I rested my hands on her shoulders trying to bring her some comfort. "You're right, they wouldn't be proud of you like this, but you were a good person before they died. Do you want to get that back?"

"Yes, more than anything. I want to think they're looking down on me with pride."

"Then keep their memory close to your heart, and let their belief in you carry you through this. You were going to college when they died?"

Slowly, she nodded her head at me. "I . . . I had to stop because all of my tuition money went to paying for the funeral bills. That's when thing started to get really bad."

Fortunately I just happened to know someone with a bunch of money that might help if I asked him nicely.

' _Can I please?'_ I silently asked Eric's permission to help her. He nodded to me his approval; watching us with a curious glare.

"If you'll go back to school, it will be paid for in full." She stared at me for a few minutes before breaking down into sobs again and hugging me like her life depended on it.

"Thank you, thank you so much!" I gave her a hug in return letting it last for several minutes. Tears stung my eyes as I remembered how much Gran's good hugs had helped me through all my hard times. My heart broke knowing this young girl didn't have anyone to give her a reassuring hug when the day had been hard. I told her to give Pam all the information on the way out and to make sure and get my contact information as well.

"Anytime you need someone you can call me. I really understand what you're going through."

"Thank you again, you're an angel." She bounced off to see Pam as I returned to Eric's lap trying not to smile like a school-girl at what I'd just done. Behind the greeting stand, I saw Pam roll her eyes at me after the girl left.

' _You do realize he's ruining business right? All those girls come here for is a chance that he'll notice them, not to get your charity.'_

' _And what do you suggest I do about that Pam? Pimp him out?'_

She looked over at me and smirked before replying. _'No, but you could put on a show to make up for the one they don't get in private anymore.'_

' _Would he be alight with that?'_

I could see her frustrated sigh from across the room. _'Have you completely forgotten he's a Vampire? If it was alright with you, he'd throw you down on that platform and fuck you so everybody could see what he has.'_ Heat and color rushed to my cheeks, and I was slightly mortified to realize her words had made me wet.

Eric noticed the change in my mood and looked from me to Pam. "What is she saying to you?"

"She's saying I should let you fuck me right here."

His face went slowly from angry to surprise. "I felt you in the bond. You were embarrassed but also excited by the idea," he leaned in close to my ear while both his hands caressed from my knee up my thigh. "Would you like that, lover, to show everyone that you are mine?" Perhaps I'd finally gone crazy, but if I'd had panties on, they would have been completely soaked. What was wrong with me? I was a Southern lady and certainly didn't have sex in front of people, much less think that was a good idea!

"Uh . . . no, not here." I managed to breathe out.

"Are you sure?" He scrapped his fangs along my shoulders, eliciting a low moan from me. His hand cupped my pussy through my pants and squeezed hard, nearly making me come on the spot. Quickly, I spun around and straddled his lap.

' _I'll admit the idea of showing everyone why you're mine and vice versa is tempting, but I don't think I can do that. Not to mention, I believe that's slightly illegal. You can still give them a preview if you like, though.'_

He gave me a fangy grin before removing my bustier, leaving me in just the black slacks and bright leather bra. If I'd been paying attention, I would have heard the many fangs that popped out all over the room.

' _You should see their faces. Pretend to bite each other!'_ came Pam's excited mind-voice.

I shut her out of my head, reminding to pay her back later for always interrupting us. I wanted to attack Eric in a flurry of heated kisses, but I thought it might be better to give him complete control in this situation. I got what I wanted anyway when Eric peeled off his shirt and brought me close to him locking our lips together. He ground his hips up into me, giving me all the encouragement I needed. I returned his thrusts and ground down into him while dragging my fingers down his arms. He let me breathe for a second while kissing my neck and teasing the audience and me with tiny pricks of his fangs here and there. When we finally couldn't take it anymore, he picked me up and took us into the office. The rest of our clothes were gone in record time and he forcefully bent me over his desk.

"You were made to be mine; I know it's been hard to act submissive, but I promise I will repay you like this every night." With that he pushed deep inside me, making both of us groan in pleasure. Over and over again, he pulled out and slammed back into me. I held onto the front of the desk trying to get enough leverage to meet him thrust for thrust. He reached one hand around and played with my clit, sending me screaming into orgasmic bliss. After a few more hard thrusts, I felt him swell and pour himself deep inside me. He helped me up and turned me around for several more minutes of passionate kissing. By the time we were done, he was hard again, and I groaned at the sight of his hard length brushing along my thigh.

"I feel like I can never get enough of you," I said while taking him in my small hand. His head rolled back as he moaned my name. Gently, I pushed him into the desk and lowered myself to my knees. With one hand, I firmly stroked up and down his shaft while my other fondled his balls.

"Fuck," he hissed when I started to tease him by sucking the tip of his cock in and out of my mouth. After I could feel his tension hit its limit, I lowered my hand and took as much of him in my mouth as possible. He gripped the edge of the desk so hard pieces of it broke off into his hands. After a few more strokes I scraped my teeth up his base and over the tip, and it was the end of him; he grabbed my hair and held me down while his sticky sweet come shot down the back of my throat.

"Fuck!" he repeated, apparently incapable of any other words at the moment. I kissed my way up his torso while he continued to enjoy the post-orgasm tremors. Much to my dismay, there was a slight knock at the door before Pam stuck her head in.

' _We're really going to have to talk about her interrupting us,_ ' I thought to Eric.

' _She's just jealous,'_ he replied as he winked at me.

"The paperwork on your desk must be completed by tonight. And you were successful in letting everyone know how good you two can fuck, so congratulations."

I had forgotten just how good Vampire hearing could be. I guess a show out on the floor was unnecessary when they could hear every moan and scream that happened. That was okay with me, as long as my body wasn't on display for everyone to judge. I'm glad they knew how much we affected each other.

"Thank you, Pamela." She dipped her head before throwing my bustier at me and leaving.

"I do need to ensure I understand everything that happened while I was gone. Pam did an exemplary job keeping things in order, but I'm the Sheriff now."

"Of course," I said before parting from him and putting on my clothes. "Is this what you normally do? Sit out there for a while before doing Sheriff stuff?"

"Yes."

"Is there anything you want me to do besides sit with you out there?"

"You have an extensive knowledge of waitressing, would you be willing to review our procedures and streamline them?"

"Okay, I have noticed some things could use improvement."

"I'd also like you to work with Pam to hire new employees; I have a feeling you would be very discerning with their intentions. If you could scan the crowd every once in a while, that would be very helpful as well."

"Consider it done. I'll go sit in your booth and get started while you go over everything in here."

"I'm going to miss being inside you," he licked his lips and not-so-subtly rubbed his hand over the large bulge in his tight slacks. Without saying a word, I turned and walked out the door; if I stayed any longer, he wouldn't have been missing anything.

The rest of the night when by smoothly, and I found I really liked being at Fangtasia with Eric. It was nice to know I could be a part of his regular life. Being a good Sheriff was extremely important to him, and I didn't want to be a distraction from that.

Upon closing time, I had completely learned their waitressing system and wrote down some ways I thought they could improve it. Reading minds wasn't tiring anymore with my new powers, so I kept it open for almost the rest of the evening; besides a couple underage girls, there wasn't anything to pick up on. Pam left with the human I had seen her chatting with earlier, and I idly wondered if she would ever find something more like Eric and I had. Speaking of Eric, I was wondering what was taking him so long to finish the paperwork. Quietly, I rapped on his office door but didn't hear anything.

"Eric?" I knocked a little louder this time, but still didn't hear anything.

Panic tingled up my spine, so I threw open the door to find . . . nothing. I searched the bond and realized it was absolutely quiet. I could still feel him; I just couldn't tell _what_ he was feeling. I replayed the evening's events over in my mind, trying to figure out when he had disappeared. I grabbed my cell phone from my purse and put in Pam's number. Just as I was about to hit the send button, my heart flooded with calm.

"It's okay, Sookie, I'm here." I whipped around to see Eric sitting in his office chair. I sat down on his lap and cried into his shoulder.

"I couldn't tell where you were or what you were feeling. What happened?"

"I met your great-grandfather." I looked up at him in confusion; my granddad had been dead for a _long_ time.

His eyes bore into mine and he held my hand tight. Whatever he was about to say, I had a feeling it was going to be mind-blowing. "Your Fae great grandfather."

* * *

I wanted this chapter to really define Sookie and Eric's relationship now that all the excitment is over. I like rough bad-ass Eric who knows how to be a Vampire but can also love Sookie. I don't think he'd ever let his duties fall behind and he would always do what he saw necessary to keep them safe.

The scene with the fangbanger was important to me as well. While I see Sook embracing her supernatural roots her personality wouldn't allow her to be as callous as some and I wanted to show her compassion.

Let me know what you guys think! Where do you see things going with Niall?


	19. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  _A/N: Here is the much awaited Chapter 19! Thank you very much to my beta YoungBoho who got this back to me last night! A big thank you to all my readers who have stuck out the long wait! There's a full summary below and the end of Chapter 18 to give you a refresher!_

_A/N: Here is the much awaited Chapter 19! Thank you very much to my beta YoungBoho who got this back to me last night! A big thank you to all my readers who have stuck out the long wait! There's a full summary below and the end of Chapter 18 to give you a refresher!_

 _Much love! Enjoy!_

 __

* * *

_Summary:_

 _*Mark escapes and they are unable to break Eric's curse_

 _*Eric has to convince Sookie he will still love her after the curse is gone so she will open up to him, she yields to him._

 _*Andre shows up at Fangtasia to take Sookie away, so in desperation Pam tells him that Eric and Sookie are bonded. Sookie refuses to go through with it until Eric is back to normal and it's "real"_

 _*Mark tries to kill Sookie but she gets away, this is where she first starts realizing her Fae abilities._

 _*She drives to Hekate's magic shop where she's safe from Mark. Hekate lets it slip that she's a Fae. She also offers to help Sookie develop her gifts, and help them track Mark._

 _*They track down Mark and get the curse lifted. Eric remembers nothing and treats Sookie like a fangbanger leaving her emotionally shattered. She's desperately afraid her recent nightmares ofAndre are going to come true._

 _*Sookie starts training with Hekate_

 _*After Andre visits at Sookies house, she's forced to move in with Eric_

 _*Eric finally offers to bond with Sookie but she won't do it because he won't admit he loves her_

 _*Eric calls the Queen and Sookie assumes he's handing her over. She's terrified of Andre coming to get her for two weeks- during which time she still refuses to bond with Eric out of duty._

 _*Eric leaves and Pam tells Sookie he didn't hand her over to the Queen and now he's going to get in trouble over her._

 _*Sookie kills Andre (yay!) Saves Eric from the Queen._

 _*Eric finally admits he loves Sookie and they bond. She confronts the Queen and tells her to back off. She also saves Jason in the process._

 _*Eric meets Niall Brigant who wants to setup a meeting with Sookie._

 _  
_

* * *

  
_Previously:_

 _Panic tingled up my spine so I threw open the door to find… nothing. I searched the bond and realized it was absolutely quiet. I could still feel him; I just couldn't tell what he was feeling. I replayed the evening's events over and over in my mind, trying to figure out when he had disappeared. I grabbed my cell phone out of purse and put in Pam's number. Just as I was about to hit the send button my heart flooded with calm._

" _It's ok Sookie, I'm here." I whipped around to see Eric sitting in his office chair. I sat down on his lap and cried into his shoulder._

" _I couldn't tell where you were or what you were feeling. What happened?"_

" _I met your great-grandfather." I looked up at him in confusion; my granddad had been dead for a long long time._

 _His eyes bore into mine and he held my hand tight. Whatever he was about to say I had a feeling it was going to be mind-blowing. "Your fae great grandfather."_

* * *

' _What the fuck?'_

Words evaded me as I tried to process what he was saying. He knew what part of my family was Fae and that they were alive? Excitement raced to the surface as I realized that I might finally get some answers to my many questions.

"Why didn't he come to meet me?"

"He knows you trust me and wanted me to arrange everything. Is this okay with you?"

"Yes, of course! What's he like?"

Eric avoided my gaze and shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "Hekate was right about one thing, he is very powerful. You're essentially a Fae princess." That didn't sound like a bad thing to me, but his behavior was making me hesitant.

"You don't seem excited about that."

His eyes snapped up to meet mine full of intense concern. "No, he has a lot of enemies and if I'm smart I won't let you anywhere near him. If the supe community finds out about this, it won't be good."

Just what I needed—more trouble. But if I had family out there, I had to at least meet them, no matter the costs. Curiosity would never let me pass up the opportunity to get some answers either.

"I want to meet him. When are we doing this?"

He looked at me with eyes full of sorrow and worry before answering. "In three days here in the office before the club opens. Are you sure you want to meet him? The Fae can be sneaky selfish creatures; he won't be like a human grandfather."

"I understand, but I want to know the truth about my powers. What's his name?"

"Niall Brigant." The name gave me chills and sent warning bells ringing in my ears. Hekate's warning to listen to my instincts rang in my ears, but regardless, I had to do this or I would always regret it. I straightened myself and looked Eric square in the eye with a confident gaze.

"Ok then, three days it is! Let's go home and get some sleep. I have to take Jason that dinner I promised him tomorrow and I'd also like to visit with Hekate."

The worry in his eyes vanished and was replaced with hope. "Are you going to talk to her about the possibility of . . . turning?"

"Among other things." I tried to sound nonchalant, but my heart was racing and the bond was overflowing with excitement.

"Let's get you to bed then, I want to know when I can make you mine forever."

"Still sure you want me that long?"

"I'll always want you, lover."

Grabbing his arm, I popped us both into our bedroom. Eric did get me right to bed; however, sleep wasn't involved until the sun had started to rise and we were forced to part our bodies. Sex with Eric was getting to be an addiction; it was like an otherworldly experience and there was no way I could ever tell him no when he wanted me—which was all the time. After dawn pulled him into his daytime slumber, I set an alarm on my phone before letting sleep take me away.

A few hours later, the loud ringing sound startled me awake. Annoyed, I blindly grasped for the object that was interrupting my beauty sleep. Unfortunately, my anger prompted me to move so fast I fell off the bed just as my fingers found my phone. The back of my head hit the corner of the dresser and the carpet scraped off a good portion of skin on my knees. After a few choice words at my phone and the dresser, I sat back up on the bed and examined my wounds. In awe, I stared as the small cuts healed themselves before my eyes. Perhaps I had ingested a little too much Vampire blood recently.

I screeched again as the big arm of my Viking wrapped around me and pulled me into his chest.

"How was your day today, lover?" he asked as he nuzzled my hair.

Before I could answer, I was on my back with a very concerned Eric inspecting my knees and forehead.

"Are you alright?" his voice was concerned, but there was an edge to it that meant death for whoever had been the cause of my injuries. I was so surprised he was moving or talking to me in the middle of the afternoon that I could only stare at him in wonder.

Gently, he shook me while staring deep in my eyes. "Sookie, can you hear me?"

Realizing that I must have looked like someone suffering from shock, I shook my head and pushed him back so I could sit up.

"I'm fine, I scraped myself but I've had so much of your blood that they've already healed. How are you awake?"

His eyebrows crinkled and his gaze wandered over to the clock on our nightstand. Confusion clouded his eyes as he brought them back to my gaze.

"I don't know. I don't even feel the urge to be at rest. I thought it was already dusk."

We stared at each other for a while as if the answer could be found in the other's face.

"You don't feel any sickness at all?" I asked even though he had already answered the question. My mind was trying to wrap itself around just how Eric could be awake right now.

He shook his head at me and tried to block the worry and fear that was coursing through the bond. I was worried too though; Vampires in general never woke during the day unless they were in extreme danger. My imagination was concocting all sorts of horrible situations where Vampires burst into the room and killed us both, or Faeries popped in and took me away; my powers were no match for all of them.

And with the thought of my powers, I burst into a hysterical fit of giggles.

"This is no laughing matter, if I'm awake, we should be expecting trouble."

It took a few minutes for me to calm down enough to talk, which I think made Eric decide that I had officially gone crazy.

"I was having all sorts of doomsday thoughts too, but the answer's so obvious." He did not look in the mood to play twenty questions with me, so I finished explaining before he bit my head off. "We just talked about you having extra powers. I don't think we're in trouble. Maybe you don't have to die during the day now. It's one of your new powers."

Alarm and relief flooded both through him and the bond.

"I want to go upstairs." He sped over to the security system and punched in a couple of codes that I still had to learn. Above us, I heard mechanical noises as things started to close. I gave him a curious glance wondering how he was going to go upstairs in the daylight.

"My entire house is lightproof. Being as old as I am, I often stay awake past dawn and rise well before dusk. I don't like feeling confined so I made sure I could roam freely if I wanted."

My entire face lit up as I realized that meant we could spend entire days together. I wouldn't have to share the breakfast table alone anymore or keep such weird hours if I didn't want to. Until I become a Vampire that is, my heart saddened momentarily at the thought of not seeing the sun again until my gaze wondered over to my Viking and I remembered what I'd be getting in return. Having someone to love, love you back, fight with, cry with, live with for all eternity absolutely was worth giving up billions of sunny days. I was broken out of my reverie by Eric starting to ascend the stairs into the house.

Regardless of the exciting situation we found ourselves in, I couldn't help staring at his world-class butt all the way up the staircase. While he might think I'm crazy for thinking it, his ass was still my favorite part of him—to stare at and admire at least. When we reached the top of the stairs, he acknowledged my ogling by wiggling his rear and winking at me over the shoulder. A lot of my naïveté had disappeared since accepting my supernatural origins, but that didn't stop the blush that rushed to my cheeks for being caught 'sneaking' glances at him. His body looked like it had been modeled after a Greek god and he knew it; there was no point in me making his extremely large ego any bigger than it already was.

A knowing smile broke his lips as he pushed open the door into the movie room. After turning on the lights, he took off and ran around the house in a blur. I took note of the fact that I could actually see the blur now instead of him just appearing places; my eyesight had become much more efficient.

Being left alone to my thoughts, I couldn't help but wonder about the implications of Eric's new gift. How was I ever supposed to get things done if he was awake all the time? Especially if he was awake during the day and had to be cooped up. When was I supposed to sleep if he didn't need to? Things were getting more complex everyday and I didn't really like it. While Eric's being awake was probably a great thing, I still needed to see Hekate today and take Jason some dinner.

Eric came flying back into the room with a giddy grin on his face. "I don't feel the least bit weakened! My strength should be non-existent at this time of day, but I can run at full speed, fly, and anything else I want to." He stopped flying in circles long enough to take note of the furrow in my brow and worry in the bond. He flew over to me and took my hands in his.

"Is something wrong lover?"

I really didn't want to be the bitchy girlfriend that makes everything about her or always sees the pessimistic side of things, but I knew this development could really change things in our relationship.

"Well, what exactly does this mean? Can you just stay awake all the time now? 'Cause I love you and all, but I'm still mortal and have to sleep. And I have things I wanted to get done today, like seeing Hekate and Jason. I don't mean to be a downer or anything, but this changes a lot of things and we need to figure out how this is going to work."

His demeanor changed immediately from playful to serious as he contemplated my words. Give Sheriff Northman a problem and he's going to fix it while simultaneously working things to his advantage. I had no doubt this situation would be any different.

"This will be a good thing." He said like it was a fact rather than a possibility.

"I will have more time to get my overwhelming amount of Sheriff work done during the day; in fact, this new development will give me an edge no other Vampire has by allowing me to excel in my duties. After you come home for the evening, we can spend time at Fangtasia, but only long enough for you to screen the patrons and for me appease the vermin. Does that sound alright to you?"

When he put it that way, it sounded more than alright to me. I didn't particularly enjoy sitting in the bar by myself for hours while Eric did his Sheriff duties. Screening so many people at once was easy and didn't give me headaches anymore, but that still didn't make it a fun or enjoyable job to do.

"That sounds just fine to me. I'm going to make Jason some dinner, if I can in your beat up kitchen, that is. When are we moving to my house?"

"The workers should be done with the renovations this evening and then we will go. It will take them one week to make the repairs here and after that we can move back whenever you like."

"One week, that's all?"

"You'd be surprised how fast things can be accomplished when the pay is high enough." I raised my eyebrows at him wondering just how much money he had. If I had to guess . . . well, I probably wouldn't be able to. I had grown up not wanting for anything, but certainly not having a lot. Gran gave us everything she could and then some, but she didn't have a lot of money. Eric had not only been around for over a thousand years, but he also had a very keen business sense.

"Interesting . . ." It would have been rude to ask him how much money he had. I gave him a kiss on the cheek and passed him into the kitchen. Upon opening the refrigerator, I realized I was definitely going to have to run to the store before I could make Jason any kind of decent meal.

Cold arms wrapped around me and squeezed me tight to a marble chest. Icy breath blew over my ear, bringing out goosebumps all over my skin and gathering my nipples into taught mounds.

"What were you curious about lover? I could feel it in the bond." It was times like this where I wasn't too excited over our bond. I was so used to picking up on other people's feelings through their thoughts, and it was weird to be on the other side of it. They say honesty is the best policy in a relationship and we have no problem in that area; the bond is like an automatic truth serum.

"You know I don't come from a lot of money. It's something I've learned to live without and don't place a lot of importance on."

"Yes, I know. That's one of the things that awed me about you."

"Well when you said you could get this entire house fixed in one week pretty much by paying the contractor a lot of money, I wondered just how much you had, being around for so long and all. I didn't want to ask though because that's extremely rude and Gran would have smacked me silly." I was rambling, but that was a nervous habit of mine. I really hadn't wanted to ask him how much money he had, it made me sound like a gold-digger!

Apparently Eric thought my distress over the matter was quite funny, as he was laughing hysterically inside the bond. He was smart enough not to actually laugh at me, but I caught the slight upturn of his lips when I turned around to look at him. "I have billions of dollars. More than you or I could ever spend most likely. Only Pam and I know where the majority is kept or the Queen would have her hands in it."

"But it's your money, why would she do that?"

"Because she would say that part of it would go to her out of fealty, much like the profits from Fangtasia. Giving her tribute from the bar I started in her area I do not have a problem with, but giving her even a part of the money I have earned throughout the years is not something I'm interested in doing."

"Oh, I see." Though I really didn't. As far as I was concerned, Vampires had far too many rules and way too much power for those in higher positions. They ruled themselves like old monarchies where Kings and Queens had all the power; their word was law. Being that they were so old, I guess it made sense in an odd way.

"Isn't it hard for new vampires to understand the way things work? With fealty and the Kings and Queens having so much power over their areas? I know there has to be rules, but society just doesn't work that way anymore."

"It can be hard to get used to, but this system has worked for a very long time. Until we revealed ourselves to the public, it was a constant effort to make sure we weren't discovered. Putting our race in a precarious situation was punishable by death and kept outrageous offenses to the minimum. We wouldn't be here today without some sort of strict government."

"But it's not about survival anymore so why not change things?"

"You forget how fast time goes for us. While you count in years, we count in decades. Perhaps the way things are done need to change, but our process of going about things is much slower than yours."

I nodded my head in understanding, happy to know a little more about the way Vampires worked. My deep thoughts came to a halt when Eric lifted my chin and placed a gentle kiss on my lips that I lost myself in for several minutes until I remembered that I still had a brother sitting in the hospital. Reluctantly, I parted my lips from his and released a heavy sigh into Eric's shoulder.

"Do you think it's always going to be like this?" I barely whispered, knowing he could hear me.

"Like what, lover?"

"Feeling like I can't ever get enough of you, but like I'm drowning in you at the same time. I feel like I could forget everything and go for years just being with you."

He pulled me in close and squeezed me tight to his chest. "My love for you does feel a bit . . . overwhelming at times, but unfortunately we must be careful to always remain focused. The moment you feel safe and turn your back is always when your enemy with catch you off guard."

"Will we ever have time to just enjoy each other without looking over our shoulders?" My brow crinkled thinking about how unsatisfying that type of life would be.

"It's not about looking over your shoulder, it's about always being aware and ready. Completely loosing yourself to anything is the quickest way to get yourself killed in our world."

It didn't escape me that he said "our world" not "my world." He was starting to acknowledge that I was a full-blown supe like him. It was nice to feel that level of acceptance from him. He squeezed me again before pushing me back to arms length and running a finger down the side of my cheek. Closing my eyes, I sighed and leaned into his loving touch.

"I will, however, take you on many trips to get away from the politics and stress this life can bring. I know you made the choice to be with me, but I will do everything within my power to make sure you're always happy with that decision."

His words made me feel all goopy inside and I think I would have swooned my way straight to the floor if he didn't have his hands on my sides steadying me. "I love you so much." I strained out between the happy sobs gathering in my throat.

"I love you as well."

I reached up on my toes and pulled on his shoulders to bring his face to mine for a chaste kiss. Mere inches from his eyes, I tried to communicate the depths of my feelings for him.

"And as long as that stays true, I'll never regret my decision." In truth, even if he did suddenly stop loving me, I still wouldn't regret my decision to be with him. Eric Northman had effectively stolen my heart and ruined me for anyone else. There was no going back now, no matter what the future held and we both knew it.

He returned my kiss with a deeper and passionate one of his one. By now, Eric knew just how to get me hot and bothered, and this was no exception. When his tongue started probing my swollen lips I stepped from him with a strangled moan. I needed a few deep breaths before I could talk again. When I looked at him, his trademark smirk was firmly planted on his features, more than pleased with how easily he could affect me.

"Remember my worry about neither of us getting anything done? This is exactly why." The smirk remained on his face as his fingers started dancing across my chest.

"Can't resist me, can you?"

I wanted to say yes, that I still had an ounce of self-control left in my body, but we both would have known it was a lie. Besides that, I was hoping he would let me go and get my stuff done if I just admitted i was addicted to him. Trying to think like Eric, I carefully plotted my answer.

"Of course I can't resist you. Every time I see you, I envision you making me scream your name while you thrust into me or lick my soaking wet pussy. But I also know that longing for you all day and daydreaming about how sexy you are makes it so much sweeter when you normally rise for the night." I looked up at him from under my lashes and flashed him a confident sexy smirk. "Don't you want to know how satisfying that relief can be after hours of denial?"

He pushed me into the counter, pressing his body close to mine and let out a deep growl.

"Or I could take you here on the counter and have the satisfaction of hearing you scream my name now."

Well that sounded like a good option. What was it I had to do that was so important again? Before I could remember, he'd lifted me onto the counter and stuck his head underneath my robe. Just as I opened my mouth to protest he slipped his tongue over my folds and my very sensitive nub. My protest died in my throat and only a strangled moan escaped. Damn him for being so delicious!

He knelt down in front of me, grabbed my thighs and pulled me to the edge of the counter, burying his face between my legs. Very slowly, he traced the edges of my lower lips while his hands barely tickled my thighs. I'd had him only hours before, but my abdomen still tightened and I became increasingly wet at his ministrations.

Teasing me further, he started nipping at the insides of my thighs eliciting deep moans from my chest. Feeling my burdening need, Eric finally stopped torturing me (albeit, in the best way possible) and firmly sucked my clit into his mouth, gently swirling his tongue around it. With complete abandonment, I tangled my fingers in his hair and pulled him even closer to me.

"Oh, you are so good at that." He drilled his tongue into my center causing shivers to run up and down my spine and a scream to leave my lips. I rode his tongue hard, enjoying every second of the mind-blowing pleasure he was giving me. When his fingers replaced his tongue pumping into me and when he bit down on my nub, I exploded all over his fingers and screamed his name just like he'd predicted.

After lapping up my juices for a few more minutes, his head popped up from beneath my robe, revealing a very satisfied smirk. He disappeared for a second and returned dangling the keys to his car in front of my face.

"Now, I believe you need to get to the store. Go get dressed and you can take my car. You do still know how to drive right?"

It took me a second to respond in my haze of post-orgasmic bliss. I was confused as to why he hadn't thrown me down and had his way with me.

"Of course I know how to drive. Why wouldn't I?"

"Because you've been popping everywhere. While convenient, I think the people of Shreveport might be a little suspicious if you just appeared in the middle of the grocery store."

"True." I jumped off the counter and started walking toward our bedroom. I stopped in the kitchen doorway and turned around.

"And why aren't we having sex right now?" I asked with a bewildered expression on my face.

"Because you have things to do, and so do I. We'll just have to test your theory about procrastination making it better." He winked at me and strolled off to his study, purposely grazing his entire body against mine when he passed. As much as I wanted to hate him for turning me on and then leaving, I had to admit that I liked the idea of both of us controlling our desires until we couldn't take it anymore. I had a thing for my Viking out of control. And I really did have things to get done.

Determined, I got dressed in jeans and a t-shirt and headed off to the store to get everything I needed to make Jason a real, Southern home-cooked meal.

* * *

As I got closer to Jason's room I could hear him screaming obscenities at whoever else was in the room with him.

"I will not calm down! I am obviously doing much better and I want to go home, lady. Right. Now!"

"Mr. Stackhouse, I understand you want to go home, but even if you're feeling better, there is no way we can discharge you yet. So please have a seat."

"Fuck you, lady."

I entered just in time to see him invading the woman's personal space, trying to intimidate her.

"Jason Stackhouse, you sit down right this instant! Gran would have your hide if she saw you treating a woman like that. You ought to be ashamed of yourself!"

He backed down a bit but he was still upset. I turned to the nurse and gave her an apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry, miss, I'll try and talk some sense into him."

She nodded her head and swiftly excited the room, obviously relieved to get away from my irate brother.

I took a good look at him and realized he was still covered in wounds, but they didn't seem to be as serious as they were just two days before. It was then that I noticed the faint blue glow emanating from the center of his clenched fists. It didn't look nearly as bright as mine had been at first, but it was still there. I guess it shouldn't have surprised me, we were related after all, and if I was part Fae then he must be as well. It was only a matter of time before he started showing some Fae qualities as well. His first bit of power still took me off guard and my eyes went wide as I quickly set his plate of food down before making him open his hands for me. He freaked out and jumped off the bed.

"What the hell? Am I a smurf now?" The look on his face would have made me laugh if he didn't look so scared.

"No, no just sit down and I'll explain." He slowly sat down on the bed next to me, but couldn't take his eyes away from the blue glow that was slowly disappearing as he calmed down.

I told him the entire story from start to finish, including the part about our bloodline being part fairy. He seemed to take it all very well, minus the part about me still being involved with Vampires. After I kindly reminded him that it was the help of a Vampire that saved him he let it go. He only stopped to interrupt me again when I explained the full extent of my powers. He wanted me to show him the different things I could do. His face was utterly priceless when I put my shield around me and popped to the other side of the bed. He sat there staring at me for a long time, likely trying to figure out if he wanted to believe everything I'd just told and shown him.

"Wow. That's all really crazy, Sook."

"I know."

"So we're fairies?"

"Yes."

"Real faeries . . . faeries are real?" It took all my strength not to roll my eyes at him, but I knew it was a lot to take in.

"Yes they are real, and yes we are part fairy. I'm meeting with one of our ancestors in a couple days, actually."

"Can I come?"

"I don't think that's the best idea. Eric said it's very possible he's dangerous and he didn't say anything about inviting you. I don't want to make him mad." Jason nodded absently at me.

"Just let me know what he tells you."

"Of course." I patted his hand reassuringly.

We sat in silence for a while as he processed all the information I'd just given him.

"So am I going to be super powerful like you?" I chuckled at him, knowing it would end up being what he took from the situation.

"No. I'm kind of different that way. Eric's blood made me stronger and more powerful. Plus there's the fact that we might be destined for something, blah blah blah." I still wasn't sure about the fated thing so I brushed it off like it was no big deal.

"You drink his blood? That's just disgusting." I smirked at him and dropped the subject, not wanting to get into details of my amazing sex life with my brother.

"So if I'm not going to be like you, what does being a fairy mean for me?"

I thought about it for a second and realized I had no idea. Something else to add to the list of things I needed to ask my great-grandfather.

"I'm not really sure. I'll ask Niall when I see him and get back to you okay?"

He sighed dramatically and leaned back against the hospital bed.

"I guess I'll take what I can get. Now what did you bring me?" I smiled at him, happy to see my normal brother returning to the surface. I uncovered the plate I brought him of homemade fried chicken and dumplings. He mumbled a thanks before digging in. When he was finished, I said my goodbyes and left the hospital feeling joyous that at least one relationship in my life had been set to rights. I could only hope that he would take my decision to become a vampire with such grace. One could dream, right?

 _  
_

* * *

  
_A/N: Yes, Jason has a bit of power in my version of SVM. I personally think Harris sounded completely retarded saying Sookie would have all this power and Jason would have nothing. If they were simple half breeds of the Fae, then maybe that would fly with me, but she made them descendants of the MOST powerful and royal bloodline! And her grandfather (Fintan) practically had the qualities of a true Fae, so really—how could they not have distict Fae qualities? Ridiculous….._

 _So you can also just pretend that Sookie's dad had more Fae powers than he let on, he just kept it a secret_   
_Don't worry though, besides a little blue energy and a longer life he's not gonna have anything special._

 _I would truly truly love if you would review =DDDD_


	20. Killing Me Slowly Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  _A/N: My husband had to work on school stuff tonight, so that combined with the fact it's freezing outside has made me want to write. I'm in my pajamas, cuddled under the covers, hot coco in hand and ready to unleash the creative beast within._

_A/N: My husband had to work on school stuff tonight, so that combined with the fact it's freezing outside has made me want to write. I'm in my pajamas, cuddled under the covers, hot coco in hand and ready to unleash the creative beast within._

 _Anyways...I was completely and totally overwhelmed by all the reviews welcoming me back and complimenting my last chapter. I don't doubt myself near as much as I used to and I have my beta, YoungBoho, and all of you to thank for that. I love writing and this story is just so much fun! I know updates are a little slow, but I work over 60 hours a week and I'm taking Graduate classes so my spare time is very limited- and when I do have it I'm usually passing out from exhaustion lol._

 _For all of you who have asked, Eric will not be walking in the sun. Like I said at the beginning of this, my story is going to have a lot of twists and turns but it's still going to make sense and it's not going to be your typical fanfic. While Sookie and Eric will be powerful and have advantages over others of their kind, they will still have their respective weaknesses- iron and lemons for Sookie and sunlight and silver for Eric._

 _  
**I'm now on twitter, facebook and livejournal. Plus I have my Hadley/Amelia one-shot posted and a one-shot up for Vampire Diaries so please check out my profile!**   
_

_That is by far the longest A/N I have ever written lol. On with the show!_

* * *

Previously:

 _"You drink his blood? That's just disgusting." I smirked at him and dropped the subject, not wanting to get into details of my amazing sex life with my brother._

 _"So if I'm not going to be like you, what does being a fairy mean for me?"_

 _I thought about it for a second and realized I had no idea. Something else to add to the list of things I needed to ask my great-grandfather._

 _"I'm not really sure. I'll ask Niall when I see him and get back to you okay?"_

 _He sighed dramatically and leaned back against the hospital bed._

 _"I guess I'll take what I can get. Now what did you bring me?" I smiled at him, happy to see my normal brother returning to the surface. I uncovered the plate I brought him of homemade fried chicken and dumplings. He mumbled a thanks before digging in. When he was finished, I said my goodbyes and left the hospital feeling joyous that at least one relationship in my life had been set to rights. I could only hope that he would take my decision to become a vampire with such grace. One could dream, right?_

* * *

My body switched into autopilot on the drive over to Hekate's _,_ letting my mind wander and be anxious for the upcoming conversation. The idea of becoming a Vampire wasn't so far-fetched considering I wasn't really human anyway, but it still frightened me more than I let Eric see. I knew he would be an exceptional maker and ensure that I could handle the vampire life even if he was gone, Pam's prowess as a Vampire was a testament to that. However, I was so worried that becoming a Vampire would irrevocably change who I was. Accepting my supe origins already made me more cynical and hard; the old Sookie never would have kicked fangbangers around. After I pulled into Hekate's parking lot, I gripped the steering wheel hard, closed my eyes and took a deep calming breath. The image of Eric's face after I told him I was considering becoming a Vampire drifted in front of my eyelids and a peace settled over my heart. Even if I lived for hundreds of years, it wouldn't be enough time to put that kind of joy on his face everyday. I wanted forever with him, and becoming a Vampire made forever a real possibility. With a clear goal in mind, I entered Hekate's shop to see if she could help me.

"Well, you're alive, I'm glad to see your bright face 'round here again. You've bonded with your Vampire, about time child."

It shouldn't have surprised me that Hekate could tell that I had bonded with Eric, but my eyebrows still shot up and I stopped in my tracks.

"Yes we did, but how did you know?" I cocked my head to the right, silently wondering how she always seemed to know things. Being a witch didn't really explain her perceptiveness and I pondered the idea that she might be a little clairvoyant. Hekate was certainly an enigma and I doubted I would ever get to know her thoroughly, even if I did end up with an eternity to try.

"I know because your aura isn't just your own anymore, or your mind for that matter. You've become one in the most sacred and powerful way two people can—connected by mind, body and soul. Your power is different, it's all over you now and much stronger. Come and tell me what all has happened." She gestured to the stool across from her in front of the store counter.

I sat next to her and enjoyed the comfort and familiarity I was starting to identify sitting in this spot with Hekate. She was filling a hole in my heart that had been there since Gran died. Eric had healed my heart and soul and I knew I wouldn't be alone, but he still couldn't fill the role in my life my Gran had. She was my best girlfriend and mentor—wise beyond her years. Hekate could never replace Gran, but she did fill that empty spot in my heart and that made me smile. I told her all about killing Andre and accepting my true heritage and letting go of my humanity. I continued, explaining how I had to save Eric and use the pendant. Her face lit up and she smiled with a humble pride in her intuition regarding that priceless item. I explained how Eric had finally admitted his love to me and how we bonded as a result. Finally, I told her what I had done with the Queen and watched as her face became more clouded as I finished the story.

"You best watch out for retaliation from the Queen. Regardless of the power you demonstrated over her, she is not going to be happy and I bet she's stupid enough to still try and harm you."

My heart dropped at her words. Sophie Anne had looked very frightened and I really hadn't thought she would try to do anything after I put her in her place, but Hekate was right. There was no way a Vampire as arrogant and quick-tempered as Sophie Anne would just let everything go. I groaned and dropped my head to my hands, trying to rub out the migraine I was beginning to think might be permanent.

"Is there ever going to be a time where someone isn't trying to kill me?"

Hekate's laughter filled the shop and amusement shown through her eyes. "Probably not, but you're not powerless anymore, you should be grateful."

That was true. I wasn't powerless anymore and I was very thankful for that. I was extremely blessed to be able to take care of myself without ending up in the hospital every couple of months.

"I know, and I am; I really am. It just seems like everything is happening all at once. I haven't even told you about my Fae great grandfather, or my brother and Eric's new powers." My nerves were starting to get to me the more I thought about just how much was on my plate right now. Before I could really get myself worked up though, I felt a huge wave of calm engulf me, immediately recognizing Eric's emotions invading my own. Closing my eyes, I let his peaceful feelings wash over me and settle my nerves, surprised that we could control our bond from several miles away. Wondering if my telepathy would work as well I sent Eric a thanks for calming me down.

" _I keep forgetting you're awake. Thank you for that, I really needed it."_

A huge smile lit up my face when I heard his mental reply loud and clear _. "What has you so upset?"_

" _Just that someone is always trying to kill us."_

" _And?"_

" _And? And someone is always trying to kill us."_

" _This surprises you?"_

" _I guess it shouldn't, huh?"_

" _It's part of our world, but you have no reason to be afraid."_

" _We still have much to discuss, Viking, and you are interrupting us. She will be home soon enough."_ Hekate's chiding voice interrupted our conversation. I chuckled when I heard Eric's mental growl at her.

" _Love you, Eric."_

He paused, still not used to showing his affection for me in front of anyone besides Pam _. "And I you, lover."_

I shut off our mental connection and refocused my attention on Hekate. "Sorry about that, it's going to take a while to adjust to these rapid changes." I finished telling her about Eric and my new abilities and my Fae heritage.

"I knew you were from a royal bloodline!" Her face was alight with pride and satisfaction. "You seem hesitant, though. What's troubling you about you're heritage?" My eyes suddenly found the floor extremely interesting as I avoided her probing gaze.

"From the moment I heard the name 'Niall Brigant' it made my skin crawl. I have a feeling meeting him is going to be a real disappointment, but I need some answers about where I come from and what to expect in the future."

"Remember what I told you about trusting your instincts. Just because he's your blood doesn't make him family and doesn't mean he should be trusted. I can understand your need to have questions answered, but don't let that need cloud your judgment. There's always another way to find the answers you seek."

"That's actually part of why I came to see you today. I don't exactly feel comfortable talking to Niall about this and wanted to see if you could help me." I paused to steady myself and took a deep breath. "I know you said you had never heard of a bonded part Fae becoming a Vampire, but I was hoping you could look into it a little more. I'm not sure if I'll retain the Fae lifespan, but forever is really the only option. I can't and would never want to leave Eric. What do you think? Am I crazy? I probably shouldn't even be asking you, I'm sorry for bothering you." I was rambling, but I couldn't help it. I was terrified she would tell me it couldn't be done and that I'd have to part from Eric one day. Just thinking about it hurt too much to bear.

"Stop fretting so much, of course I'll help you. Though I can tell you right now you will live for hundreds of years just as you are. With your other Fae qualities manifesting so greatly it would be absurd to think you wouldn't gain longevity as well."

I let out a breath I hadn't realize I'd been holding. "Thank you so much, I really appreciate it. Thinking about permanently being away from Eric is debilitating. I don't think I'd mind staying as I am for a few hundred years though. Being almost a full-blooded Fae is already a big adjustment, I don't want to have to learn how to be a Vampire at the same time."

"Wise choice young one; I'm proud of how much you've grown in the short time I've known you." My face beamed with joy at her gracious praise, I knew her compliments were likely even harder to come by than a Vampire's. "Thanks, that means a lot to me!"

We sat and chatted like old friends for over an hour more. It was nice to sit and visit with Hekate when death wasn't knocking on my door. She is an incredibly witty and fun person to carry on a conversation with. We only said our goodbyes after a customer came in and she had to excuse herself to help them find an ingredient for some banishing spell.

I pulled out of the shop feeling much more light-hearted and clear-minded than when I had went in. Just like Gran, Hekate was able to help me sort through my thoughts and emotions to keep me on the right path and help me be true to myself.

When I walked in the entryway of our home there were two suitcases sitting next to the door. Eric appeared before me in a flash, causing me to gasp and take a step back. "You still scare me when you do that you know." His eyes glittered with amusement and a smirk appeared on his way-to-kissable lips.

"I missed you today." He wrapped me tightly in his arms and placed kisses all over my neck and face making me shiver in delight.

"I missed you too, so much" I smiled wide before giving him a sweet kiss.

"How did things go with Hekate? Did you discuss the matter of becoming a Vampire?" he asked anxiously.

"Yes I did. She told me she would look into it and try to find something of use to us. The good news is she said it's practically one-hundred percent guaranteed I'm going to stay just as I am for hundreds of years. So we have a while to research things and for me to get comfortable in all my new powers before trying to learn how to be a Vampire, too."

He sensed my worry and sent a wave of calm through the bond. "You know I will teach you very well as your maker, you don't have to worry about that."

"I'm not worried about that, I know you will be the best maker a new Vampire could ask for. It would just be a little too much at once, you know? If I'm going to stay the same for a while anyways, there's no point in rushing it." I made sure the bond was wide open so he could tell I really wasn't having second thoughts, I just knew it would be better if we waited a while.

"I understand. This is still spectacular news then." His face lit up with a big genuine smile and I felt his final bit of worry over my mortality slip away from the bond. He gave me a strong hug that I returned with equal vigor. It was beyond reassuring knowing I would never have to give him up.

"What are the bags for?" I asked motioning to the suitcases next to me.

"The changes have been made to your home, so we're ready to stay there while the repairmen fix all the damage that's been done here." That was good news. I was by far ready to stop feeling like I was living in a disaster zone. "After our appearance at Fangtasia tonight, we will go to your family home if that is agreeable with you."

"Sounds perfect to me. What time do we have to be at Fangtasia?"

"Pam is opening per usual so we don't have to be there until ten at the latest."

I glanced at the clock noting it was only six o'clock. I gave him a mischievous smile and grazed my hand along his thigh. "Whatever will we do for the next four hours Viking?"

The playful glint disappeared from his eye and was replaced with a predatory hunger. "Do not start what you can't finish. I have been thinking about fucking you all day. You are the one who wanted to play this ridiculous game of waiting until the evening was over. Can you not abide by your own rules?"

The smirk was dancing on his lips again, but this time with a dangerous edge to it. I had been so preoccupied thinking about getting him out of his clothes that I had forgotten about my earlier idea. I hadn't really intended to carry it on through sitting at Fangtasia, but his demeaning words riled my pride and I simply couldn't back down.

"Oh I can still play just fine, but it doesn't mean I have to play fair." I gripped him through his jeans and stroked his rock hard member. He grunted and leaned into my touch, roughly grabbing me by my hair and waist and pulling me into a bruising embrace. Just as he brought his lips close to mine, I used my Fae powers and popped out of his arms into the kitchen. I heard his roar of frustration and I couldn't help but burst into a fit of giggles. I loved being able to get the upper hand on him every once in a while. Unfortunately, I had forgotten how much of a bad idea it is to laugh outright at an ancient Vampire. He sped into the kitchen and trapped me against the refrigerator.

"Do you think it's fun to torture me woman?" I couldn't quite seem to get the smirk off my face, but knowing what was good for me I still managed to shake my head back and forth.

He pushed his body fully up against me, letting me feel the entire length of his hardness press into my heated core. I gasped as he projected all sorts of dirty images of us together in my mind. Compared with his fantasies, mine were completely G-rated. The particular vision of me strung up in the basement of Fangtasia while he pounded into me relentlessly made me squirm. For some reason, it made me moan and thrash in his arms rather than be repulsed. There was something so primal and hot about letting him take full control like that. Where once I probably would have seen that as disrespectful, now I trusted him enough to never hurt me and to take me to heights of pleasure I've never known before. He bent down and scraped his fangs against my neck before stepping away. I fell to the floor in a heap of quivering arousal.

I felt his mouth at my ear, his breath sending chills down my back. "Two can play that game, lover."

He left at Vampire speed and I heard his own laughter reverberating throughout the house. Damn that man. It just wasn't fair that he had a thousand years of experience on me. I pouted for a second before picking myself up off the floor. After the lust abated a little, my stomach reminded me that I still needed to feed it. There wasn't much in the refrigerator so I made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I wanted to go to the store and stock up, but I figured it would be better to wait until we were at my house so it wouldn't all spoil by the time we got back here.

After finishing my sad little dinner, I used my telepathy to feel for Eric. His distinct energy pulse was in the upstairs study. Assuming he still had work to complete, I left him to it and went to the exercise room. I felt like getting in some cardio before going to Fangtasia; my life may not be in any immediate danger, but I had become used to the routine of practicing with my Tsias. I called them to me from the shelf and began the set of moves Eric had shown me. When I first turned around to look in the mirror, a flash of our earlier sexual rendezvous in that very room danced before my eyes, and a shiver went down my spine. I had a feeling practicing in that room would never be the same after that experience. Concentrating on my goal, I pushed the lust aside and focused on sharpening my movements with the Tsais. After becoming comfortable with my normal sequence of training, I started adding in my additional Faery powers—popping from place to place, throwing the Tsai only to call it back to me, as well as popping in midair and using my telekinesis to bring myself quickly back to the ground.

After a couple hours of practice, my forehead was beaded with sweat, my hair was slicked back from the extra moisture, my breath was coming heavily, and I stunk to high heavens. I felt good, though—really good. The slight twinge to my muscles let me know I'd had a fantastic workout. My powers had been stretched and used extensively, making my skin light up with the faint blue glow I had become accustomed to.

By the time I was done, it was eight-thirty, so I rushed to take a shower, grab another quick bite to eat, and pack for the couple of days at my house. At nine forty-five, Eric was practically tapping his foot, ready to get out the door. I threw the last couple things in my suitcase and rushed out to the car. The trip to Fangtasia was extremely long and uncomfortable, the air in the car alive and crackling with the intensity of our sexual tension. I'm ashamed to say that not even halfway there I had to literally sit on my hands to keep from touching him. Absently, I wondered if it would be like this between us forever. Would my lust for him ever ebb, or would I always have an insatiable need to feel his skin on mine? Part of me wished it would tone down a bit, just so I could focus on other things once and a while, but the other part me never wanted to be satisfied. As long as he was there to stoke my fire, I was ok with it burning brightly inside me. I wondered if he suffered from the same problem I did, so I asked.

He thought about it for a little before responding. "I do frequently get distracted by my lust for you, but since Vampire minds work differently I can compartmentalize it if necessary. I would still feel the burning desire, but I could also think about many other things and make decisions very clearly. It's a very convenient perk of being a Vampire. You'll know one day." He gave me a genuine smile at that last remark, obviously still on cloud nine from our earlier discussion. I returned the smile and covered his hand with mine. The pangs of desire that were unbearable moments earlier returned with a vengeance at the contact. Eric groaned, feeling the new intense wave of lust through the bond.

"Wavering in your decision, lover?" He glanced at me with a laviscious grin.

"Absolutely not, I'm not some hussy; I can wait to have sex with you." I rolled my eyes at him, but he just laughed in return. Our bond let him know I wasn't not nearly as confident as I sounded and was wavering in my ability to not jump him. Thankfully, we pulled into Fangtasia at the precise moment I felt my last resolve slipping away. I practically bolted from the car, trying to put some distance between myself and my irresistible Viking.

Still almost running, I got through the employee entrance as fast as possible and took a deep breath. I tried to tell myself to think of things to calm my libido down, but you know how that goes; you tell yourself not to think of something and it just makes those images pop up that much more. Eric and I in the shower, in front of the mirrors, in our bedroom, and everywhere else we'd been together. Closing my eyes I took a deep breath to calm myself and force my feelings back in check. When I opened my eyes, I was uncomfortably close to a very amused looking Pam. I shrieked and tried to jump back.

"Pam, don't do that!" She leaned in close and sniffed me from my shoulder all the way up my neck. My heartbeat picked up, unsure of what she was going to do.

"You smell less like my master tonight and the scent of your arousal is very strong. Would you like me to help you with that?" She grinned at me with her fangs down and her eyes full of lust.

"Uh, n-no," I stuttered. I was very relieved when I heard Eric's voice coming from right behind us.

"Leave her alone, we're playing a game to see who will last the longest, or if we can both last until the end of the night."

Pam's eyes glittered with amusement as she took a few steps away from me. "You are both ridiculously stupid, but I shall enjoy watching your pain" she smirked at us and walked back out to the main floor. I watched her as she walked away, still stunned by our small exchange.

"I think I know what to expect from her and then she goes and does something crazy like that. I wonder if I'll ever really know Pam."

Eric gave me a knowing smile as he walked passed and grabbed my hand to drag me with him. "That's one of the very reasons I decided to turn her. Forever is a very long time to be connected to someone, she has yet to bore me over these hundreds of years, and I doubt she ever will."

"And what about me, do you think you'll ever tire of me?" I asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

He stopped walking and turned around to look me hard in the eye. "After everything we've been through, do you honestly think I could ever get bored with you or leave you?" There was an edge to his voice I hadn't heard directed at me in a long time. I should have known he would have sensed the serious undertone in my question. He looked insulted and angry.

I took one of his hands in mine and used the other to cup his face. "Of course I don't really think that. I may be all supernatural now, but I'm still a girl, and girls never stop worrying about stuff like that. It's just good to hear you repeat how much you think I'm amazing." I gave him a million-watt smile and threw my arms around his torso.

I felt his body relax and his chin came down to rest on top of my head. "If reassurance is what you need from me, then I will tell you how much I desperately need and want you every morning of my existence."

My heart melted and happy tears gathered in the corner of my eyes. "I love you," I whispered before standing on my tiptoes and giving him a sweet kiss.

"As I love you dear one. We need to go make an appearance now." I nodded in understanding and followed him out to the main floor. Immediately upon entering the throngs of people, something didn't feel right. My spidey sense was screaming danger over and over again. Trying to push it aside so I could function, I grabbed Eric's arm and followed him to our thrones. Thrones . . . I still thought the principle was silly and downright unnecessary.

After taking our seats, people started lining up to get a chance to speak with Eric or even myself at times. Mostly, I remained quiet trying to figure out what was going on that had my instincts on such high alert. I scanned the crowd, finding nothing out of the ordinary except for one man. It wasn't that his thoughts were malicious or anything; they were blank. I couldn't hear him. My forehead wrinkled as I once again tried to peek into his thoughts. When I got nothing for the second time, worry began seeping into my bones. No one had been unreadable to me since I had fully accepted my Fae powers. Trying again, I realized that I couldn't even get to his mind, it was like he was using an energy shield similar to mine, but it was invisible. I tried every way I could think of to get through, but it was useless. I noticed the man flinched when I pushed particular hard against the barrier. After that, I withdrew my mind from his presence, realizing he knew what I was trying to do.

" _Eric I think we have a problem."_

He inclined his head toward me with a questioning look in his eyes. _"Is a member of the Fellowship here? I can have Pam take care of them."_ His lips curled up into a smirk revealing the tip of his fangs.

" _No, that man over in the corner booth, I can't read him. At all. I've tried everything but it's like he has a shield up similar to mine. Even worse, I think he knows I was prodding. I've never run into anything like it before."_ The words went unsaid, but I knew he could tell through the bond that I was nervous and scared.

To my horror, Eric fixed his gaze on the man and waved, summoning him over to us. The stranger's face lit up with an evil grin that made my skin tingle. I wanted to get as far away from him as I could. After taking his dear sweet time, he was finally bowing at our feet. Eric's nostril's flared and his eyes widened.

" _He reeks of magic."_

" _Great, just what we need; more magic."_

Now that he was out of the dark shadows of the corner I was able to get a better look at him. He was a tall slender man with a beautiful muscular build. He seemed to ooze natural beauty with his long black hair, piercing green eyes and strong chin. He was dressed in a sleek black suit that probably cost more than I was used to making in a year. I think all the women in the place went home with whiplash trying to decide if Eric or the stranger was more beautiful. However, like the Vampires he also gave off a deep vibe of aggression that made everyone give him a wide berth.

"I have not seen you before. What is your purpose in my area?" The humans around the bar caught onto Eric's meaning; the man in front of them wasn't what he appeared to be—wasn't human. As if finally sensing the danger surrounding the newcomer, everyone around him took a further step back. Unlike most people who spoke to Eric this guy was confident and looked him straight in the eye.

"I've come to tell you you're both dead, that she's going to die painfully and brutally." His lips cracked into a full smile revealing two razor sharp teeth that resembled fangs.

Eric roared at him in rage, like only a true Viking could, and lunged for him. He grabbed him by the neck and lifted him high into the air. "How dare you threaten me or my bonded! What are you?"

He completely ignored Eric and locked his gaze onto mine. "Really, you don't recognize one of your own kind?" He said in a mocking tone. The muscles in my stomach seized into knots, my breathing became labored and acute terror took over. I couldn't read him because the magic he was using was the same as my own. He was a Faery, but an evil one from the looks of it. Though for all I knew, Faeries _were_ evil.

Not wanting my truth to be exposed, Eric went to detach the Fae's head from his body, but he popped out of his grip and disappeared. All that remained were the faint echoes of his maniacal laughter. Eric let out a grown of frustration and started pacing around the room, looking like he'd gladly rip off anyone's head to satisfy his need for blood. Everyone's sharp intake of air could be heard throughout the room. As far as the humans were concerned, until two seconds ago Vampires were the only supernatural thing that existed. You could tell that most of them were in shock.

' _Pam, shut all the entrances and make sure none of the humans leave until they've been glamoured.'_ I was glad Eric still had the capacity to make quick decisions because I was still focused on the "she's going to die painfully and brutally part." As I sat and mulled over his viscous words, I felt Eric's hand gently grip mine.

"It's going to be alright, I'll never let him hurt you. Would you please help us glamour the humans?"

 _'Is it ok if everyone knows I can do that?'_

 _'Yes, if anyone asks it's a part of your telepathy.'_

I nodded my agreement and couldn't help the smile that came with his words. He was truly thinking of me as a supe and an equal rather than as a human. As indiscreetly as possible, I made my way around the room and erased the night's memory along with all the Vampires. When everyone was done, I did a quick scan to make sure we hadn't missed anyone. I gave the all clear and everything went back to normal like nothing had happened. The humans shook off the daze and started drinking and socializing once again. Several Vampires came to the front, reassuring Eric of their fealty and offering to help in any way possible. You could see the burning question in many of their eyes wanting to know what the creature was and how it related to me.

" _I have a feeling we're not going to be able to keep my identity as a Fae a secret for much longer."_

" _You have been masking your scent, there's no reason for anyone to suspect anything."_

" _Unless they find out that the guy who attacked us was Fae too, I mean it was kind of obvious from the powers he used. Anyone who's familiar with the Fae would know what he was."_

" _Even if the Vampires here made the connection, there's not enough evidence to make it worth spreading to those who could cause us problems. Unless you start expressing authority over them by wielding your Fae powers we will be fine."_

I let his words calm me down as much as possible and pushed the fear as far from my mind as possible. We had already survived several misfortunes and had just discussed earlier how this was a side effect of being a part of the supernatural world. I had to get used to the idea of people making threats at me and I needed to take them in stride. If I got freaked out and stressed every time it happened, I had a feeling I'd be in for a very long eternity.

" _So what now?"_

" _Now we continue to entertain the vermin."_

" _And what about the Faery?"_

" _There isn't much we can do about it now. But my list of questions for your great grandfather has grown substantially. Regardless of the fact he is your family, I will not hesitate to kill him if he had a part in this."_

I thought about it for a minute and came to the conclusion that my great grandfather was most likely not the instigator. _"I don't think that makes sense, why send someone after me if he could take care of things himself? After all, he's had the chance. Maybe he'll know how to find the guy."_

Eric nodded his agreement and I could feel his resolve to figure things out in the bond. I knew he wouldn't let this fiasco go until he'd hunted down and killed the Faery who had threatened me.

Eric was rude with everyone else who approached him the rest of the evening. He was acting like the old Sheriff Eric, and it was seriously turning me on. I felt way too hot, so I asked if I could go get a glass of water. Eric excused me so I trotted off to the bar. Quickly, I returned to his side, drink in hand. I leaned over and gave him a passionate kiss letting my free hand glide up his thigh to rest on his rising arousal. After a gentle squeeze on his manhood I sat down on my throne. Instantly, I could tell his torrent of anger at the attack had shifted into a deep lust for me. Smiling at him from underneath my lashes, I latched my lips over my straw and sucked up the liquid. Feeling naughty, I sent him a mental picture of me sucking on something that definitely was not my straw.

In a flash he had me out of my seat and pinned against the wall, his hand around my throat keeping me in place. Two bright white fangs had clicked into place, projecting Eric's aura of authority and danger even higher.

With eyes full of bridled anger and lust, he leaned in close to me. "Do. Not. Tease. Me." He whispered in my ear. Several months ago, his actions would have terrified me, but now I knew Eric would never hurt me and I could always stop him if I wanted to. So, instead of being scared, I was just really turned on from his show of authority. It took a lot, and I do mean a lot, of willpower to not moan in desire. I lifted my lips closer to his ear and whispered in a voice low enough for only him to hear.

"And what are you going to do if I don't listen, Master Eric? Punish me?" I had meant for the whole thing to come out dripping with sarcasm, but instead I ended up sounding like a depraved hussy. Eric's lips turned up into a snarl and his eyes dared me to challenge him. He couldn't fool me, though; the bond was screaming with surprise and a deep uncontrollable lust.

His grip around my throat tightened slightly, emphasizing his control over the situation. "Yes, I would punish you, and it would not be pleasant."

Contrary to his words, my insides tingled and a throbbing ache began in lower belly. If everyone hadn't been staring at us, I would have begged him to take me up against the wall, but a part of me, still wanted my sex life to be semi-private.

Wanting to push him further, I gently caressed my fingers up and down his side. He growled at me and threw me over his shoulder taking me into his office. He threw me down on the couch and loomed over me.

"So does this mean I win? That you give in?" I asked as innocently as possible.

Real irritation glazed his eyes making me shrink back from him a little. "What makes you think I was bringing you in here for that purpose? I'm punishing you Ms. Stackhouse. So stay here like a good girl and maybe we'll play later."

With that, he sped off at Vampire Speed, leaving me alone in his office very unsatisfied.

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 _A/N: Yay! I really enjoyed writing this chapter! I was getting bored with the constant E/S nookie so I decided to turn up the heat by way of sexual tension :) lemons will be back next chapter though! And I'm obviously bringing badass Sheriff Eric out to play ^^  
_

 _What's up with this new villain? Who do you guys think he is?_

 _Please leave a review and PLEASE friend me on facebook/twitter/livejournal...cus I feel completely ridiculous posting for myself lmao *muah*_


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